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age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: Hi folks,I go to this club to sing and I have a lot of friends there and enjoy spending time with them. There are a few guys and women I talk to, all different ages and one girl there is my friend and she is much younger and has a new boyfriend. He is a guitar player and he sings too. One night he was playing the guitar and it was so crowded that me and my guy friend had to stand by the counter almost directly in front of him. While my friend turned around to watch the game on TV, this young man started to smile at me while he was playing and he looked at me quite intensely, almost in a flirtatious way. Every time I go there I catch him looking at me and smiling. I wanted to brush it off and say that he is just being friendly by smiling but now he does it more often. I have only spoken to him once and it was about his guitar. I'm trying to just be polite when I say goodnight everyone and he gives me an intense look every time. Do you think he might be a player?
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (24 November 2013):
 You say that he (and his girl) are much younger than you....
Maybe he has a "Mommy" fixation.... Ask him... better to flush it out now, than find out later that he just wants to accompany you whilest you sing....
Goood luck...
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2013): Stop making yourself available to be on the receiving-end of his smiles and intense stares. You're eating it up!
Remember your irlfriend and boyfriend? Two people who trust you?
Don't label him a player, if you're the catcher. Limit your eye-contact, and pull closer to your boyfriend to send the message that "you're not a player."
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (24 November 2013):
 He's your friends BF so I would just ignore it. Maybe he was looking at you because he knew you, I know some performers have a hard time knowing that a lot of people are looking at them so they focus on ONE person or ONE spot and it feels less intimidating.
OR maybe he just is a bit of a flirt.
Either way, ignore ignore ignore.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2013): I don't think that just because someone smiles and maintains eye contact that he's necessarily a "player".
If you notice this mainly when he's performing (or just before/after performance) this could be part of his "stage persona". As a musician, performances in pubs and clubs are often treated more like having a radio or DJ playing so artists show their appreciation to those who are actually watching them by smiling and maintaining eye contact with their audience.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (24 November 2013):
 It doesn't matter what he is...If he stares at you and you are there to stare back you are going to encourage him to continue. I wouldn't stand where he cannot see you.
He has a girlfriend and it's not like he is climbing over tables to get to you...just put yourself out of the reach of his gaze and pretty soon you will see him making eyes at someone else...
It's an ego thing.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (24 November 2013):
 He thought when you stood in front of him you were trying to get a good glance of him because you fancied him. Musicians are very flattered that you pay attention to them, because most of the time people treat them as background music. Maybe he heard your singing and liked it. He shouldn't be staring at women while having a girlfriend, so I would have to say he has player tendencies. Sometimes one woman's adoration is not enough.
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