A
female
age
18-21,
*oolkelly12
writes: IS IT RIGHT THAT MY PARENTS HAVE PUT ME IN PRISON ? AND ARE THEY BEING MEAN FOR NOT LETTING ME GO OUT INTO OUR GARDEN ? I got caught shoplifting, my parents said they don't want to see me go to jail, so are punishing me severely, they have sentenced me to 2 weeks imprisonment, I am confined to my room and my bedroom door is locked, we are having a heatwave and I have been SHUT away in my room for 4 days, I am BORED , FED UP and VERY miserable, because its so hot and sunny I asked my parents if I could go and sit in the garden for a couple of hours, they said NO NO NO my punishment is to have my freedom taken away which means NO going out and that's the end of it I have stay in my room and my bedroom door stays locked. IS THIS PUNISHMENT FAIR ? DO YOU THINK I SHOULD BE ALLOWED OUT INTO THE GARDEN ?
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female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (29 July 2018):
 How old are you? Eight? Or 15? Because you sound quite immature if you don’t understand that there are consequences to actions.
What do you think a fair punishment would be for someone who stole your property?
A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (29 July 2018):
 Then LEARN from this and DO NOT commit crime again. Don't steal things that do NOT belong to you and maybe your parents will start to trust you again.
Sure your sister is enjoying you being in trouble... she is your sister. Siblings DO that. But again... IT IS your own fault you are in this situation.
YOU made the CHOICE to steal. Actions have consequences.
If you were in your parents shoes what would you do if YOUR kid shoplifted? Would you just say, don't do that again and let them get away with it? OR should there be consequences?
Life isn't fair OP.
Actions (you stealing) have consequences (punishment)
Have you considered what the people at the store have to go through when people steal? Some stores TAKES the losses out if the employees wages... so someone working minimum wage has to pay for something YOU stole! How is that fair?
They also have raise prices to factor in SOME of the losses. Which means OTHER PAYING customers have to pay extra BECAUSE you chose to steal... HOW is that fair?
You are treated the way you are by your parents because they are disappointed in you and your choice to steal. They are SHOWING you what COULD happen if a store decided to press charges. You are locked up, because that is what SOCIETY do with people who commit crimes and get caught do.
While stealing something minor might not (in the bigger picture) be a big deal in your book. It can BE for those who continue to steal.
Stop whining and take responsibility.
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A
female
reader, koolkelly12 +, writes (29 July 2018):
koolkelly12 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI am finding my punishment VERY tough, my friends have just come round to my house to see if I want to go bowling tomorrow, my sister took great pleasure in telling them I am LOCKED UP and confined to my room, I want my freedom back, I don't like being confined its BORING and its MISREABLE surly I don't deserve to suffer and be punished like this ?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 July 2018): Yes the punishment is entirely fair. Be grateful your parents love you enough to try and make you a better person. And be grateful to the shopkeeper that he/she didn’t call the police. You need to think long and hard about why you shoplifted and what you are going to do to ensure that it doesn’t happen again. Prison is not a nice place and if you get caught shop lifting by the police there is every chance that is where you will eventually end up. Time to grow up!
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A
female
reader, koolkelly12 +, writes (29 July 2018):
koolkelly12 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI have bottles of water and my parents or older sister brings me my meals,my parents have taken away my tv, phone and ALL entertainment , my sister has lent me her tablet, but I am NOT supposed to have it so if I get caught I will be in more trouble, my bedroom window opens at the top so I can get fresh air, its just so MISREABLE looking out at the sunshine, I asked my parents if I could sit in the garden for a couple of hours ? they said NO NO NO my punishment is to have my freedom taken away, and that means NO going out of ANY kind , my bedroom doors stays LOCKED and I stay in my room,WHAT HARM IS THERE IN ME GOING OUT INTO THE GARDEN FOR A COUPLE OF HOURS ?I hate being punished why does it have to be so hard ?
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A
female
reader, koolkelly12 +, writes (29 July 2018):
koolkelly12 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionmy parents have set me essays to write, 1 is a 6 page essay on why its wrong to steal, and a 6 page essay on anacceptable behaviour and punishments, I also have to write a letter of apology to the shop keeper who called my parents instead of the police.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (29 July 2018):
Yes, I think your parents are right to CHOOSE how they punish you.
YOU committed a CRIME - stealing is a crime. You were lucky that you got released into your parents custody and they they CARE enough to punish you.
So what that you are bored? You are so much more focused on what you think your parents are doing wrong you are taking NO RESPONSIBILITY for stealing. Shame on you.
Maybe you should take some time and figure out why you thought stealing was OK. And maybe you should THANK your parents for giving a shit about you and your POTENTIAL criminal record.
You might think why you did was no big deal - SO many people steal. Sure. So many teenager RUIN their future for a glossy lipstick from Sephora. It CAN prevent you from certain scholarships. Internships and jobs in general.
Is that thing your stole really worth losing your parents respect for you? And ruining your future?
Think about that. And stop acting like you did nothing wrong.
You are not in prison, you are simply GROUNDED.
If you stole to impress a "friend" or someone else, you seriously need to consider who you keep around as friends. I can tell you this, any of my kids did this? They would be punished for longer than 2 week. They would also apologize to the owner or manager of the store, not be allowed to hang out with whomever was there for the theft and PAY for the item stolen. There would be no phone, no internet, no nothing...
You have your room and internet? what on Earth are you whining about?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 July 2018): To put it in perspective though you still have internet. Rather than complaining maybe you could make good use of the time. Maybe think about why you shoplifted. Were you unhappy about something in your life? The two weeks will be over before you know it but if there is some underlying problem that will still be there.
From a parents point of view it can be quite hard to give and follow through on a long punishment. They obviously care enough about you to do this.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek + ♥, writes (29 July 2018):
 You are looking at this through the eyes of the wronged but you must see that you did something wrong, and you actually wronged your parents not the other way around! Stealing is a crime, you can go to jail for it. Your parents are trying to teach you that when you make transgressions there is a price to pay. I think your parents are being quite fair. Yes you are banned to your room but think about how bad it would be if you were in jail! Learn from this and think carefully about your actions in the future. I am speaking as a parent of 2 children. Trust me if my children had stolen they would have grounded for 2 weeks with no internet as well as not going anywhere!
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A
female
reader, Bazil  +, writes (29 July 2018):
what you are getting from your parents is tough love and to be honest, as a parent myself a very fitting one. Can you imaging what it would be like in a real prison if you were to be a sticky fingered adult? Two weeks of home detention in a safe environment, you should think your self lucky that your parents want better for you and STOP stealing. Just because you stole from someone you don't know does not make it a victimless crime. Society is the victim of shoplifting. That's one reason we pay more at the check out to cover the insurance cost of theft. My advice would be to worry less about the sunshine out in the garden and start worrying about regaining some level of trust with your family.
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A
female
reader, koolkelly12 +, writes (29 July 2018):
koolkelly12 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionmy parents lock my bedroom door because I have sneaked out when grounded in the past, I am finding my punishment VERY tough, I am looking out of my bedroom window at the sunshine,but I cant go out because I am locked in,have you any idea what its like to be escorted to and from the bathroom then hearing my bedroom door SLAM shut, then hearing the key turning in the lock CLICK, I know I have done wrong and must be punished, but why does punishment have to hurt so much ?
what harm can I do by being allowed out into the garden for a couple of hours ?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 July 2018): You may not think your punishment was not right and I think so too.They should have grounded you much longer like at least three months.You should not ever get a phone until you are 18.You should also have a afternoon job like pulling weeds or shoveling horse manure.If you had a job it would keep you out of trouble.If you were my kid the punishment would have been much worse.Your parents are letting you off too easy.Stop complaining all you got was a slap on the wrist.I hope you learn something from this but from the way you talk I doubt it.I hope your parents read this and give you a harsher punishment because you still do not get it.sad.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious + ♥, writes (29 July 2018):
 Your parents are not "putting you in prison". They are, quite understandably, trying to stop you ending up in REAL prison.
To answer your questions:
YES, it is COMPLETELY fair how they have chosen to punish you. They are your parents and are trying to get you to consider the path you are choosing to go down and to stop before it is too late.
NO, you should NOT be allowed out into the garden. If you are old enough to do the crime, then do "the time". Allowing you to go in the garden is not punishment. If you were in real prison, you would not be allowed to go out as and when you wished.
You are not going to endear yourself to your parents by constantly complaining about being punished. Now is the time to show you have learned your lesson and to grow up, take the punishment and realize where your behaviour is going to put you if you don't grow up fast.
If you parents are being forced to lock your bedroom door to keep you there, that tells me you are refusing to take your punishment. You did wrong. You got caught. Now take the consequences. Stop being a drama queen and throwing a strop because your parents are trying to stop you ruining your life.
Get caught shoplifting again and you could end up with a criminal record. That will have to be revealed to future employers. It will stop you getting into some jobs. Is that what you want for yourself?
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A
female
reader, Ormskirk360 +, writes (29 July 2018):
 The punishment is fair. Don't be a disgusting little thief, and you won't have to deal with the consequences. A punishment is meant to be a punishment; it's not meant to be fun, and you shouldn't get a break.
Your parents are probably ashamed and disgusted by your actions. If they don't fix you now, you'll deal with a lot worse when you're older.
Suck it up, Buttercup. Stop acting like a spoilt child that doesn't know what they did wrong. Accept your punishment, and if you've any sense you won't want to repeat it.
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (29 July 2018):
 The important question here is WHY are you stealing? Tell us the reason behind it. Did you just decide to do it yourself or influenced by friends?
Shoplifting is against the law as you well know. Broken laws can end up in jail time and as you’ve told us your parents don’t want to see you there. So surely you can understand why they are punishing you to this extreme level? I don’t necessarily agree with them locking you in your room but I suppose that’s the luxury you could look forward to if you continue to break laws when you’re older. No freedom whatsoever.
You’re at a very young age but you should still know right from wrong. Don’t get caught up with the wrong crowds that are doing illegal activities like this. Your parents love you and have gone to these drastic measures because they want to scare you straight. No parent wants to see their child on a path of crime, they want the best for them! Don’t make this a habit.
Learn from this experience, on this occasion your parents have restricted your ability to leave the house. If you get punished by the police the outcome could be a lot worse. Stealing things is NEVER okay, would you like it if someone broke into your house and stole your favourite possession? I don’t think you would, so don’t think that it’s okay to steal what another person has paid for as you will be punished accordingly!
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (29 July 2018):
 Stop with the capitals and shouting. You shoplifted, so yes, this punishment is fair, provided you can open a window for fresh air and still have regular food and drinks.
You need to buck your ideas up, OP. I'm glad you're bored. You're not supposed to enjoy your punishment. This is still better than prison would be for stealing.
Time to grow up and not act like a stroppy child. As long as you have food and water, as well as opening a window and access to a toilet, your parents are doing the right thing.
Why and what did you steal?
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