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Anyone know this average?

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 December 2012) 17 Answers - (Newest, 24 December 2012)
A male United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

What is the average number of men a 26 yr old girl has slept with?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2012):

The fact that some kind of behavior might be common does nothing to justify it.

It is very common, and therefore very "average", for your partner to cheat on you. But that doesn't mean you should accept cheating.

I suggest you hold out for the type of woman you really want, whatever that might be. Don't settle for something else just because it is more common.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2012):

Average? Each woman is different depending on her background, some more than others.

I can say most women have slept at least with one man when they reach that age.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2012):

You should go ahead and break up with her. It's bad form to torture someone and then dump them.

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (18 December 2012):

eyeswideopen agony auntI have a strange premonition that you will be posting another question at DC in the very near future...Heads up Yos it's going to be for you....

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A male reader, Serpico United States +, writes (18 December 2012):

I dont get how an average is "none of his business." Like saying the average tax payment is "nobodys business." In short, and average reflects absolutely nothing about a single person if the sample size is not very small.

That said, I do crack up when I see the average partners for women often comes to like 4-6, yet the average partners for men often comes in as 17-20. If the size of each heterosexual reproductive population is roughly the same (and it is), then by mathematical necessity EACH OF THESE NUMBERS MUST BE ALMOST IDENTICAL. Yet in poll after poll, you see a huge spread like this.

What does this tell me? For one, I believe the real numbers for both lie somewhere close to the middle - like 11 or 12 each. For two, it is more evidence of our still strong connection to our evolutionary past. Despite what the media will tell you, most women want to be perceived as chaste, and therefore willingly lie about their number. Conversely, most men still want to be perceived as studs and willingly lie about their number. Quite the funny dance, but as is typical, the real story usually lies right in the middle....

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A male reader, Yos Netherlands +, writes (17 December 2012):

Yos agony aunt"Average" can be very misleading. Just like "normal". For this particular number the mean and the median are probably rather different

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2012):

On the basis of my past GF's, I would say the average in America is between 3 to 4 excluding the prostitutes and call girls.

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (17 December 2012):

Sageoldguy1465 agony auntMost 26 year old women have slept with 5.75 men.....

THAT's the fact, Jack.....

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A female reader, Sassy4Life United Kingdom +, writes (16 December 2012):

Does her past concern you or make you feel uncomfortable is the question you should ask yourself, not what's the average!

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A female reader, person12345 United States +, writes (16 December 2012):

person12345 agony auntThe average number of sex partners for a woman's lifetime is 4. The average number of sex partners for whoever you are asking about is whatever her actual number is. My number is lower than that. Two of my friends are still virgins. One of my friends is nearing 30. Why do you want to know?

P.S. A 26 year old is a woman, not a girl.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2012):

Why 26? Are you seeing a girl of this age whose past you are uncomfortable with? Are you going to use the "average" you get here either to accept her because hers is less, or to judge her if her number is higher?

I'm not 26 yet, so I can't provide my own number for your perusal. As many have pointed out, there is no magic number. A few girls will still be virgins, and some will have slept with more partners than they can count. The majority of us fall somewhere in the middle of those extremes. I'm guessing you at 30-35 are neither a virgin nor married to every woman you ever slept with, so unless you go around advertising your own past I'd say a woman's "number" is really no business of yours :)

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A male reader, Fatherly Advice United States + , writes (16 December 2012):

Fatherly Advice agony aunt@ Chigirl, I would think the Mode (the most popular number) would be most helpful.

Really the average number is no help in determining what is right for you. Sex forums like this are often asked what is "normal"? That is a question professional counselors won't answer. What is average for society has no bearing on what you will be comfortable living with. Average numbers just lead you to unrealistic expectations.

As to it being no ones business I don't believe that either. I think anyone committing to a long term relationship should be allowed that information. Knowing that a person has averages 1 new partner per week for a period of over 5 years says something about that person's ability to connect.

FA

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (16 December 2012):

So_Very_Confused agony auntprobably more than you would like it to be.

it's going to vary by woman and it's really got no bearing on anything to be honest as it's a private matter for the woman involved.

I know some who were virgins and some who had many partners.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2012):

I married at 19, and I was a virgin, different times, different country. My husband was 26 when he married he had 200.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2012):

Well I am a 26 year old female and I have slept with 11 guys. My oldest friend has slept with 1 person and another of my friends is at 30+. The rest are somewhere in between I believe, so I don't think there is an average really. I'm really curious to know why it matters to you though? If you are asking this to compare the average to the 'number' of someone you are involved with then I would stop right now as it is not going to benefit anyone.

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (16 December 2012):

chigirl agony auntI don't think there actually are any good statistics on this, because not every 26 year old in the world has been asked in a survey, and anyway it depends entirely on what country you live in, maybe even what part of the country you live in. And then, as always in statistics, you always have the extremes at each end, who drag the statistics way up or down. What you don't need to know is the average, what you'd rather want to know is the median (the middle number when all numbers and lined up in a row). Now, the median can be several numbers, not necessarily one number. Based on nothing more than my circle of friends I would say the median is about 4-7 people at the age of 26. However, that just counts for my circle of friends.

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A female reader, AuntyEm United Kingdom +, writes (16 December 2012):

AuntyEm agony aunt0 to 300...somewhere on that line.

The real answer is probably none of your business!!

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