A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been in my current relationship for a year next month. My boyfriend goes to a place(two hours away). And there are times when we only see each other 3 times a month. For one he doesn't exactly have any money at the moment and at times I don't feel like he cares. I have told him this countless times, and all of our arguments have revolved around this. There have been many things hes done which have shown he cares, but there have been many things that I question. Every time something bad happens that he does I complain to my friends. I complain about him a lot. But I still want to be with him. So because of this my friends have a bad attitude about him and think I should not be with him. Most recently my boyfriend wanted to take a break because I brought up how I feel he is a bad boyfriend again.. He made a good argument by saying he has never once complained about something I've done and there are little things that are annoying but he gets over them and does'mt care because he cares and love me. He wants to go on a break because maybe it will make me see that he is a good boyfriend and that he does care. He says maybe hes not right for me. Another argument he made was how if he only sees me three times a month, at times then if he didn't care why would he stay with me. When I told my friends of this recent break they said it was a good chance for me to dump him because he is not a good boyfriend. Even close friends of his who are also my friends think he is a bad boyfriend. But I cant help thinking of his argument because I do only tell them the bad and not the good so of course they are biased. I myself have thought he was a bad boyfriend but he always makes up for his mistakes. He doesnt cheat or talk to other girls, its just little things like we never really go on dates and he spent all his money on weed and didn't have enough to take me to dinner on valentines day. I'm not sure if maybe I just am too hard on him or if he really is a bad boyfriend and I should listen to my friends.
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female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (18 April 2012):
 He is a bad boyfriend. A man doesn't have to be physically and emotionally abusive to be a bad boyfriend. If you feel like you are not getting enough in this relationship it is reason to get out. Listen to yourself. Are you happier because of him, or do you feel that this relationship is still better than nothing? Your boyfriend is happy the way he is now and sees no reason to change. The break is for you to figure out whether you want a man who nurtures you inside and out, so that you don't have to feel like you are settling with a man prefers spending money on weed.
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