A
male
age
26-29,
*rch16
writes:I am a 16 year old male an I have fallen in love with my 23 year old co-worker who is dating our manager what do I do? she says she is leaving him for me when she gets her car I just need advice.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (8 November 2011):
 In the USA it is illegal for a 23 yr. old to date (i.e. be intimate with) a 16 year old and she will go to jail for it.
Is it even remotely possible that she's just kidding you and teasing and flirting? and that because you have a mad crush (aren't they wonderful and terrible all at the same time) you are misconstruing her words?
AND even if it is true, if she is dating someone and is willing to dump them for you, what’s to stop her from dumping you for someone else later on?
What do you do? Can you find a new job and move on?
A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (8 November 2011):
 Look this is only going to get messy and could cause a lot of trouble, I know this isnt what you want to hear but you need to stop this now and tell her you dont want to be with her (even if you do, you cant be with her for many reasons so you need to put an end to this).
First of all, what is the age of consent in your state? Normally in the US it is around 18, so if she has a relationship with you chances are she could get into a lot of trouble with the law because technically if she has sex with you it is statutory rape. And she is a lot older than you, so they wont go easy on her like they would if say she was only a year or two older than you. So do you really want her to go to prison because of you? If you really do love her like you say then you wont want her to get into trouble with the law so make sure you avoid ANY sexual contact otherwise there will be big problems.
Secondly, if this actually happens and she leaves your boss for you - work is going to be a nightmare. You wont be able to keep it secret that you are together for long, so you are both putting your jobs on the line. Can you afford to lose your job? Can she afford to lose her job?
Also I need to say this - often when a person is a cheater (like this girl is, she is cheating on her partner by having feelings for another person, regardless of whether or not you have actually acted on those feelings its still cheating) - they lie and tell stories to keep the other person (i.e. you) interested. So I highly doubt that this girl is going to leave a successful businessman for a 16 year old boy, sorry to say this but she is just telling you what you want to hear to keep you hanging on. She probably just likes the attention from you and thinks it is fun, you aged 16 wont have much to offer her whereas your manager I'm sure is closer to her own age and will be able to give her the sort of life she wants, no girl wants to date a teenager who cant drink, who probably cant drive yet, cant have sex yet....sorry but at your age you dont have much to offer an older girl.
I am 24 myself so not much older than your girl, and I can honestly say that if a 16 year old boy was interested in me I would find it funny and sweet, but it would be very very wrong to feel anything more than that, I would feel a bit like a pedophile!
I honestly dont think she is going to leave him for you, so you need to start getting your head around that and maybe it will help you move on.
This relationship would never work, she is simply too old for you and you have nothing to offer her. Dont allow it to mess up your job, that would be pointless. Explain to the girl that you dont think this is a good idea and you want to put an end to this, and then move on. Yes you will have to see her at work but keep your distance as much as possible and in time your feelings will go away.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (8 November 2011):
 It can be hard and feel you are in love when in reality it may be a strong teenage crush that could really hurt your reputation at work. Do you need that to happen? Certainly not. You need to keeep your job and work hard to impress your colleagues with your diligence and your good team work.
You do not need underming by someone false.
Jobs are hard to find and good jobs are worth keeping until you are ready to move into a better JOB postion.
Being unemployed is not fun.
First and foremost relationships and work are often a recipe for disaster.
And how long do you think she will keep her job once she breaks up with the Manager?
And if the Manager thinks you caused the breakup how secure do you think your job will be? The Manager will blame you for the break up with "his" girlfriend.
This girls sounds like Trouble with a capital T.
What a shallow manipulative girl. Keep your distance. Be pleasant to her but keep it all official. She also has the potential to harm your reputation at work with the Manager with a well place snippet of mis-information.
Keep your head down. Work hard. And look serene on top while you work as hard as possible just in case she has already sewn a little seed of doubt about you in the Manager's ear.
This is NOT the type of woman you need to be involved with. She is the type of woman who deserves a player as shallow as her.
Is the Manager also married? But not to her?
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