What are some other ways I can enjoy foreplay?
Q. I am not able to perform oral sex on my husband at the moment, please can anyone give me advice on other ways to pleasure my husband during foreplay....
A. 6 July 2005: Oooh I love issues like this...lotsa spice & variety ! To begin with, find out what turns your hubby on. I mean find out what REALLY turns your hubby on !! He may be a bit shy at first & beat around the bush with his answers, but you're a Go... (read in full...)
Even though it's legal for me to have sex now, I'm too scared!
Q. Hi, I'm 16. It is now legal for me to have sex. I'm scared to have it. My friends tell me to wait till I'm ready, but there is a boy I really like, he always tells me he wants me to be his first. I liked attention from him so I said "you never kn...
A. 6 July 2005: First of all, you have some misguided preconceptions about sex. If you say no to sex...it does NOT mean you will never have a boyfriend. It just means you are not ready, sweetie. Do NOT allow yourself to be pressured into sexual intimacy, especia... (read in full...)
When we have sex, I don't feel a thing!
Q. My boyfriend and I had sex but I don't think he went all the way because every time we have sex I do not feel a thing. What do you think the problem is? Wondering...
A. 6 July 2005: Your story is a bit vague with details, but it sounds as if your boyfriend has a small penis or erectile dysfunction. The other issue might be a lack of internal sensitivity in your body. I would suggest visiting a doctor, having a full physical an... (read in full...)
Out of nowhere, my b/f announced that he couldn't take on my kids and decided we have to end it!
Q. Dear Cupid, I'm feeling so awful right now, my bf of a year has ended our relationship. I love him so much and want him back desperately. I have 2 children from a previous relationship who he had taken on, got on with and they had taken to hi...
A. 6 July 2005: Oh sweet soul, my heart goes out to you. It sounds like your ex did A LOT of soul searching before he made the decision to end your relationship, and he knew it would hurt you (I'm sure he's hurting too) but he did what he thought was right...... (read in full...)
Our sex drives are mismatched. She thinks we have sex often enough, but I'm frustrated...
Q. I am married to a beautiful 30 year old woman who I love dearly, but she has always had a very low sex drive and I am finding myself looking at other women and generally getting frustrated and depressed. We have sex less than once every two mont...
A. 6 July 2005: If you truly love this woman and desire to spend the rest of your life with her and grow old together, then I would advise it's time for Action ! Sharing sex once every 2 months is not enough for men ! Your wife may be comfortable with that idea, ... (read in full...)
I'm so keen on my English teacher. What can I do to be his favourite?
Q. I am a student and I have a crush (a major crush) on my english teacher. He knows I'm a good student and all, but he is never frank with me. I want him to like me and treat me as his favourite student. What can I do?...
A. 6 July 2005: He is your TEACHER...hired by the school system to teach English and ONLY English. If he got involved with you...he would be Fired and his reputation and career would be totally ruined. Your need to be "favourite" stems from somewhere else. ... (read in full...)
Could my girlfriends be right about this guy's shady background, or am I worrying too much?
Q. I have met a man on the internet about 4 months ago and see him about every two weeks as he goes on a lot of fishing trips and lives in a houseboat in Teddington. My concern is I do like him but am worried about his past although of course w...
A. 6 July 2005: If he acts one way with his friends, and a different way with you, it is just a matter of time before the 2 worlds EMERGE or COLLIDE and you will see his true colours. I do not believe your girlfriend is jealous...it sounds to me like she is shari... (read in full...)
My new guy says that he's"over" his ex-wife, but I just don't believe him...
Q. I finalized my divorce last fall and started dating six months later. I hit it off immediately with a man who moved out sooner but who only resolved his divorce last month. He says he's over his last wife (she left him) and "is not going back t...
A. 6 July 2005: Number one...this fellow is FRESH out of a relationship and has 3 little added responsibilites on his plate. Also, he keeps photos of his ex close by to look at A LOT. Where does he keep your photos? You want children but he does not...BIG ISSUE.... (read in full...)
Both of us are virgins, and even after several tries, we haven't successfully had sex...
Q. My boyfriend and I have been "trying" to have sex for about 3 or 4 months, but each attempt ends in failure. We are both virgins and put the first few failures down to nerves, but after the first few times I realised it could be more than that. M...
A. 6 July 2005: Online advice varies about this situation. The best advice I can give is to make an appointment with a gynecologist for both of you. The specialist will examine you & make an accurate diagnosis of the problem, and offer helpful solutions to rem... (read in full...)
We're getting married in September, but when it comes to sex, he pushes me away!
Q. My boyfriend doesn't want sex with me. Me and my boyfriend have been together for 6 years now and we're getting married in September. But he never wants sex with me. I try and turn him on, but he pushes me away. I'm starting to think it's me. I do...
A. 6 July 2005: You may love him, but the question is, does he love you? When a couple really love each other, sex is WELCOME. After many years together, the sex might be less often, but still enjoyable. If he is pushing you away now, it will only get worse as t... (read in full...)
My guy behaves differently when we're alone than he does with his mates. Why?
Q. I'm only 14 but I really like this boy. I am going out with him but I don't think he likes me and that he is using me. This is because he acts different around his mates, but when I'm alone with him he's different. What do you think I should d...
A. 6 July 2005: The fact that he acts differently around his friends when he with you, does not necessarily mean that he is using you. Guys like to show off for each other, but act better when they are alone with a girl. But if his behaviour continues, I wou... (read in full...)
So afraid of rejection that I don't know if I'll ever find a relationship that lasts....
Q. After many years of failing to start a relationship with someone, I fell in love with a 13 year old (I was 31 at the time). This isn't pedo, as I've not been interested in schoolgirls before or now. We ended up seeing each other (with both our ...
A. 6 July 2005: I've got news for you mister. If you are sexually & romantically interested in a 13 year old CHILD....you ARE A PEDOPHILE ! I refuse to beat around the bush. You are 31 years old...so don't toss rubbish about getting parents consent...her pa... (read in full...)
His insensitivity about my feelings is ruining the great relationship we had!
Q. I'm wanting a bit of advice from other readers please ;0) I have a happy relationship with a wonderful man, we have 2 children together and I thought I had everything in the world. My partner moved 200 miles to live with me and since he moved he...
A. 6 July 2005: First of all, you do NOT have a happy relationship with a wonderful man. I agree with you...he is totally INSENSITIVE...and Selfish! The fact that you have blessed him with 2 beautiful children, should fill his soul with joy & appreciation. I... (read in full...)
I want to break up with my boyfriend, but I just keep going back to him!
Q. Hi, Im 16 years old, and Im with my boyfriend of 10 months. I'll admit our relationships has had its up's and downs, but he can be a really nice guy, and he has always been there for me. See I havent had the best of luck in life, my parents used to ...
A. 6 July 2005: Hi ya sweetie...my heart goes out to your situation. First of all, if your boyfriend knows the abuse you suffered in your past, and that your father is dying, BUT he still had affairs on you...HE DOES NOT TRULY LOVE YOU. True love is faithful and ... (read in full...)
My husband leave me unsatisfied and I don't want to let him know!
Q. I am 37 and have a very high sex drive that I am afraid to let my husband see because he takes advantage of me when it comes down to sex. Many time I'm left unsatisfied while he rolls over and falls asleep. I'm faced with a dilemma, don't get me ...
A. 6 July 2005: By not being HONEST with your husband, you are not being true to yourself and are allowing him to become a selfish lover. You must let him KNOW that you want MORE and that he is not "stepping up to the plate" He needs to "hit a home run", not j... (read in full...)
I see beautiful young women everywhere, but all I'm attracted to are the older ones...
Q. This may be a stupid question but all my friends are giving me crap for dating women way outside my age. I'm 23 and most women I date are between 35 to 42. My current love interest is 40 and I don't understand why I'm not attracted to women my own ...
A. 6 July 2005: Ah yes, the age old question of older ages. If older men are attracted to younger women, then younger men also have the right to be attracted to older women. Just remember, if there is a 20 year age gap...when you are 45(in your prime) she wi... (read in full...)
My crush is in his 20s and I'm 15. I know he's too old for me, but what do I do?
Q. I have a huge crush on this guy. The only problem is that he is way too old. I am only 15 and he is like in his 20s but I always want to see him. What should I do?...
A. 6 July 2005: If a 20 year old guy chases a 15 year old girl...there is something definitely wrong with that picture ! Now if it's YOU chasing HIM...you need to change the direction of your focus...to guys closer to your age. Leave him alone sweetie...you ar... (read in full...)
I picked up herpes from a casual relationship with him... Should I tell his new girlfriend he's got it?
Q. I was having a casual relationship with a good friend of mine and contracted herpes from him. He knew that he had it but didn't tell me. Now he has a new girlfriend, she's 16 (he's 23) and she's a really nice girl, they've gotten into a serious r...
A. 6 July 2005: Sheesh...this "good friend" of yours is not a good friend at all ! If he did not inform you that he has herpes, he's a JERK ! Now he's with a sweet young 16 year old who is naive & inexperienced & she is about to be RUDELY AWAKENED with the fact th... (read in full...)
He thinks the world of me and finds me sexy, but he just doesn't seem to care whether we have sex...
Q. Hi, My problem is that me and partner are not having a lot of sex of late and its been going on for quite a while. No he's not cheating, and I have talked to him about it. The problem is that it seems that I'm the only one bothered about whether ...
A. 6 July 2005: It sounds to me like you are trying to compete with your boyfriends "porn stars" by desperately trying anything to make him horny for you. (handcuffs, dressing up, dirty chat, being naughty, etc) Sweetie...be yourself...pull away from him & make you... (read in full...)
My partner was up all night and says he was "just talking"... but I can't stop thinking they were up to no good!
Q. Myself and my partner live together, we have this mutual friend who came down at the weekend with his partner. On the Sunday night we stayed in and our guests went out for the night. I went to bed at about 2am and my partner said he would follow....
A. 6 July 2005: If they sat up all night talking in your own house, I wouldn't worry too much, unless the talks continue or they isolate their "chats" at another location. Keep an eye & ear on the pulse of the situation. Let the female KNOW that he is your man. ... (read in full...)
Was I just being self-destructive to meet my old flame before I get married?
Q. I'm getting married in less than 2 months to a wonderful man. We've been together for almost 3 years, been engaged for 2. Up until 2 weeks ago I was blissfully happy, then my self destructive behaviour got the best of me. I dated a man for 2 we...
A. 6 July 2005: If you are really in love with your fiancee than NOBODY can tempt you into leaving him. I understand your need to meet with this other man, because you sought closure, but now you are confused & full of doubt. For those reasons, it would not be fai... (read in full...)
He's thinking over going out with me, but was I too forward asking him out?
Q. hiya! I have this crush and I just asked him out. He is thinking about it at the moment but do you think I have done the right thing to ask him out cos he is a year older than me? I am 13 and he is 14, is that wrong of me? Should I be going out w...
A. 6 July 2005: There is an important lesson for you to learn sweetie. It's wise to let the guy ask you out. Guys love the HUNT...just be yourself & they will notice you. When they are ready to ask you out...they will...don't make it too easy for them or they wi... (read in full...)
My new guy and I have never really dated, but we kiss and cuddle... Where do I stand?
Q. There is a guy that I met online a while back, maybe 6 months ago. He was fresh out of a 5 year relationship so we were just chat friends. He would always joke about me coming over to his house. Maybe he wasn't joking, but about 2 months ago h...
A. 6 July 2005: Why buy the cow if you can get the milk free? No worries sweetie...you haven't given the "milk" away yet. Some hot passionate kisses & cuddling are great, but if you really want to win this guy over, it's time to pull back & stop allowing yoursel... (read in full...)
We've broken up and it hurts. So what do I do if he asks me out again?
Q. I miss my ex-boyfriend so much. We really loved each other and he has already gone out with 2 other girls since we broke up and we havent talked since the break-up. This is the 3rd time we broke up and it really hurts. I love him to death but I do...
A. 6 July 2005: Don't fret or worry about what MAY be or what MIGHT be. If you asks you out again, I would say no thankyou. 3 times around the track is enough to prove to you that the relationship will not work. He is dating others, I would suggest you do the... (read in full...)
Don't know what to say to my girlfriend, who I know found out about my weird compulsion!
Q. I have a bit of a wierd habit and my girlfriend has found out, and now I don't know how to handle it... I am 24, and for several years I have had the compulsion to steal girl's used underwear from their wash baskets. I don't know how it started b...
A. 6 July 2005: Your situation brings a chuckle & a great memory. My last boyfriend also had a compulsion with ladies undies. He stole a pair from each one of them, including me & would masturbate with their undies on his face. When I discovered his preoccupa... (read in full...)
We didn't have actual sex... but could I still be pregnant?
Q. My boyfriend and I are in love, and we do not have sex because we do not feel that it will benefit our relationship right now. We do however immensly enjoy foreplay, and "dry sex". Well I've missed my period after 'dry sex' and was wondering if I ...
A. 6 July 2005: Go to your local drugstore & purchase a pregnancy test. If you are not pregnant, but still fearful about it, make an appt with your doctor & get guaranteed results & peace of mind. In the future, to prevent further upset, do NOT let his penis co... (read in full...)
Want to get over my ex and get back on the dating scene... but I'm so anxious!
Q. I have recently come out of a 5 year relationship and now I'm having real trouble living the single life... It has been 3 months since we broke up, although we have had several "relapses" since then, we are both sure that the relationship has...
A. 6 July 2005: It's obvious you are a creature of habit and routine. You are comfortable with long term relationships & commitment. I would suggest SHAKING up your pattern a bit...add the spice of Variety...without sex ! Date several ladies for a few months ... (read in full...)
Sometimes I think our foreplay goes on for so long it's almost, well, boring!
Q. Hi everyone and I'm hoping I can get an advice... I have a sexual problem, I think I can describe it like that, or else please help. Well, I'm a guy,20. and I have my girlfriend that we both have a very active sex life, but there are two thin...
A. 6 July 2005: Foreplay is a wonderful and important way of entering into sexual intimacy with another person. If you are finding foreplay boring...I would suggest taking a break for a few weeks. No sex. None at all. Just dating, kissing & hugging...no s... (read in full...)
Right now, our relationship is great! So why do I worry that I might lose him?
Q. Hello, Bev, your advice would be much appreciated on this and anyone else who would care to help. I've been with my boyfriend for nearly a year now & i love him so much & he loves me back. He tells me all the time & says he would love it if we co...
A. 6 July 2005: Bev's advice to you ROCKS...she hit the nail on the head ! I read your story & conclude that you & your boyfriend truly do love each other, so now it's time to work on some of your past insecurities & be healed. If your fears & moody episodes a... (read in full...)
I need help with my questions about contraception...
Q. I have a very strong thought about this and we ( My girlfriend and I did it twice in a month ) are pretty unsecure. First of all, we have had sex , very much unprotected and I'm very much aware about it that is wrong, not the fact of having interc...
A. 6 July 2005: If you continue to have unprotected sex, I can GUARANTEE you will become a Daddy in 9 months ! Stop messing around and take action NOW. Sex is great, but it carries responsibilities. Education is the best cure for ignorance...read & learn... (read in full...)
How can I make new friends at university?
Q. I'm in university so it's a new social world. I don't have a friend so I want advice to help me to make new friends and social contacts. ...
A. 6 July 2005: To begin with, let a SMILE be your umbrella ! Smiles are absolutely contagious & attract people to us. Study your fellow students in class, observe their personalities during breaks and meal times. Allow yourself to be drawn to the personaliti... (read in full...)
It's not just the distance between us... he also has an issue with my weight. Could it still work out?
Q. I am 24 years old. One year ago, I met a guy online who lives in another part of the country. We got along very well from the beginning, both of us have been very honest and open about ourselves. This carried on for months as friends, but there ...
A. 6 July 2005: Obviously you care about this man deeply, but I would like to gently make you aware of some issues you have perhaps not thought about. You have lost 50 lbs. since you have been involved with this man. 1) BRAVO for you for losing that weight...yo... (read in full...)
His friends seem more important to him than our time together...
Q. I have been dating my now boyfriend for a little over a month. We were long-distance friends for over a year until he moved back into the area. I am having a problem with his friends taking priority over me. He works nights so the time we get to see ...
A. 6 July 2005: Ever hear the saying, "what's good for the goose is good for the gander?" Give your boyfriend a taste of his own medicine. Some evening when he wants to be with you, sweetly tell him that you have made other plans with your friends. Do it ... (read in full...)
I don't want to lose my girlfriend, but I can't deny my attraction for a guy from work!
Q. O.K., here it goes. I am a bisexual male, and I have been with my girlfriend for over 3 years. I have only had two contacts with a man in the past. I recently started hanging out with a guy from work that I believe I am falling deeply in love with, ...
A. 6 July 2005: I have a close friend who was married for years & discovered he was bi-sexual. He told his wife & their marriage ended because she could not accept it or deal with the issue. Now he is in a loving relationship with another female who understands ... (read in full...)
I never developed breasts and I don't feel like I could ever really satisfy a man's needs.
Q. I'm a twenty four year old female with sex issues. I find it hard to enjoy sex because of my physical shortcomings - I have never developed breasts. I don't mean that I have small breasts, I have literally NO breasts at all, just nipples. My sto...
A. 6 July 2005: It's obvious you have personal issues with your breasts. MANY men are attracted to women who are flat chested. Your boyfriend reassures you, but still you feel insecure. I would advise consulting a plastic surgeon for implants. My sister got... (read in full...)
My husband came back after moving out, but he hasn't given up his girl-on-the-side!
Q. My husband told me three months ago that he no longer loved me, although he still cared for me. He also told me he had started a relationship with a work colleague whom he left to live with a fortnight later. After two days he realised that he ...
A. 6 July 2005: Being together for 16 years & having 3 children has created quite a history for you and your man. But when it comes to infidelity...draw a SOLID line and refuse to let him step his hairy toe over it ! Obviously he does not realize or appreciate th... (read in full...)
He didn't return my call, even after he gave me his phone number. But then he gave me a meal for free...
Q. Dear Cupid, I go to this restaurant all the time and noticed a very attractive waiter there. I decided after seeing him there a few times to tell him that he is very attractive on one of my visits there and I also asked if he had a girlfrie...
A. 21 June 2005: Well, the advice that Communicatrix gave you Rocks ! I saw the guest on Oprah who wrote the book "He's not that into you." I agree...if a guy has your phone number..he's also got FINGERS to use to dial your number. If he doesn't phone you...he's... (read in full...)
Does the 7-year itch cover visits to prostitutes?
Q. My partner of 7 years recently visited a prostitute. They didn't have full sex and he admitted to me what he had done the day after. He said that his reason for going was that as I had been the only woman he had ever been with he had got curious ...
A. 21 June 2005: If you really love each other & have a solid relationship, I would try & find it in your heart to forgive him, but if he EVER does it again...respect yourself enough to leave ! Make sure if he's REALLY sorry, that he has to earn your trust & respec... (read in full...)
My bf tells his mates that he loves me more than anything... but then he slept with someone else!
Q. My boyfriend of a year and a half suddenly sleeps with a girl who's in town for a couple of weeks. We live together snd in the past have become very close and have had the best of times. Since January things got rough. I became preganant and lost...
A. 21 June 2005: Dear Hurting so bad, My heart goes out to you concerning your situation. It sounds like your partner truly cares for you but he is struggling with some intimacy issues...and so are you. Plus, you have endured a TRAUMATIC upset when you lost your... (read in full...)
We haven't even dated yet... Has he broken up with me already?
Q. Dear Cupid, Last month I met this great guy on match.com, he was everything I wanted and I was everything that he wanted in return. We talked over instant messenger and talked over the phone for hours. We both knew how each other looked liked, so...
A. 21 June 2005: I read some of the answers from online folks & Dear Kelly gave you some wise advice about internet dating. The majority of men on dating services LIE THEIR FACES OFF ! Most of them are married or sneaking around on their girlfriends. St... (read in full...)
He broke up with me, wanting us to remain "friends", but I don't think I can deal with that. Should I?
Q. My boyfriend , of six weeks, called me a little over 2 weeks ago and said that he thought "maybe we should break up." So, I said okay fine we're broken up and left it like that. The next day he came by my house, apologized profusely and wanted t...
A. 21 June 2005: Dear Young & in Love, I read your story & I believe you are a VERY intelligent young lady ! You have this guy ALMOST figured out...Bravo for you ! I have witnessed relationships similar to what you experienced. It sounds to me, as if this guy is ... (read in full...)
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