Is my FWB falling for me?
Q. I have been in a fwb relationship for almost two months now.he generally emails me throughout the day to see how I am doing or just random talk through emails. I really connect with this man and am catching feelings. If he wasn't feeling the same ...
A. 9 April 2014: I understand talking is scary. It means in most situations that you are going to learn the truth. Be prepared to hear the truth and have a sense beforehand about how you are going to handle it. If he says he just wants to be fwb and keep things that ... (read in full...)
Are these the signs of a friend or a man who is interested in more?
Q. A man acts in the following ways with me: Always pays most attention to me in a group situation to the point where if we are all sitting and lingering after a discussion and some people leave and others stay but then I stand up to go, he will imme...
A. 9 April 2014: I would say to play it cool. You all work together and it can be extremely awkward if you date someone at work and end up sleeping with him as well. How would you feel if he were still flirty with the other woman there after being intimate with him? ... (read in full...)
Feels like no one is genuinely excited about our engagement. There are challenges. What can I do to cope with it all?
Q. It feels like no one is genuinely excited about my recent engagement. I've been dating a wonderful man for about 6 months and he recently proposed. We are in a long distance relationship, and there are a lot of challenges to us being together-t...
A. 28 March 2014: Call off the engagement on the grounds that you cannot live together and let him know you feel it would be in your son's best interest to be in a more conventional household and since you can't move, you must regretfully call it off. See if he has ... (read in full...)
His idea of a compliment left me troubled
Q. Hi. I would be grateful for some opinions please. My partner of ten years has never paid me many compliments but the other day, he said he had been watching me sleep and had made a decision. He said he thought to himself, "Yeah, she`ll do". He said ...
A. 28 March 2014: He might have been trying to be humorous and complimentary but since it came across in the wrong way, he should be telling you, "What I meant was that I was watching you and realized how much I love you and how grateful I am to have you in my ... (read in full...)
His colourful past adds to my anxiety about my body!
Q. I'm a very insecure woman. Throughout my dating life, I've had nothing but rejection and hurt. As a teenager, I was constantly rejected in favor of prettier girls. I've always felt ugly. Then I had a long relationship with a guy for whom I made MANY ...
A. 28 March 2014: You have to trust someone in order to know if you can trust them. You have to embrace love in order to know if it is real and lasting. You have to become confident and stop living trapped in your fears. You only have one life. This is not a dress ... (read in full...)
When do I know when he wants to become official? What are the signs?
Q. I need some help haha. I have been seeing a guy for some time now, we constantly text all the time, and we have also spent some time together. I asked a couple of weeks ago what was happening between us, he told me he wanted a relationship however ...
A. 28 March 2014: Give him some time and give him his space if you sense he needs it. It should become clear within a couple of months. If he is still wishy washy after you have been dating for a few months, I'd recommend having a conversation about it and if he is ... (read in full...)
Can I never trust a guy after this?
Q. Please help me. In January I met a guy in Facebook and we both started chatting. After few days of chatting we both exchanged our contact number and he started calling me. After few weeks we decided to meet at one of his friends home. We both wer...
A. 28 March 2014: I have had some disrespectful men come into my life. I have also been rudely propositioned. Now you know to take your time and get to know a guy for a few months and let the ones who are only looking for sex lose patience and leave. Also, most men ... (read in full...)
I'm questioning my break-up!
Q. Hi Everyone, Thank you for taking time out to read this, especially since it is so long. I was in a relationship for 14 months. He and I got along very well. I have never enjoyed someone's company as much as I did with him. I found him engagi...
A. 28 March 2014: We all want to be the number one priority in our significant other's life or to feel as though we are supremely important. This man has obligations to his children and to his mother and does not make enough money to do more than simply support his ... (read in full...)
Condom wrapper and girl's scarf found in my boyfriend's car… I'm having trouble trusting him! Any advice?
Q. I'm having trouble trusting my boyfriend of a year and a half . I have been burned in the past (cheated on) and am a naturally suspicious person. Here's my dilemma. 1) I found a ripped open condom wrapper in my boyfriends car. Near the drivers...
A. 28 March 2014: It all sounds rather suspicious for him having sex with a woman in his car and her forgetting her scarf. You could wait until the next time you find evidence. Just lie low for a while and snoop around again later and you will most likely find some ... (read in full...)
Feeling fed up. Job going no where. Haven't met "The One". Has anybody experienced this situation and have any advice?
Q. Hi everyone, just looking for a bit of advice. I'm 26 and just feeling really fed up with life. I spent 5 years in uni and trained as a teacher but I currently work as a sales manager. I didn't love teaching and jobs were few are far between ...
A. 28 March 2014: Create two vision boards. One is for career and the other is for your relationship that you would like to have. Use poster board and cut out pictures from magazines and newspapers and words that speak to your wishes. Aim high...whatever you want, ... (read in full...)
I have a massive crush on my much-older, married landlord. Would it be worth it if I could sleep with him just one night?
Q. Ok I don't know where to begin here but I have a massive crush on my landlord. Like I'm not saying I want to run of to the sunset and marry him lol, but I have fantasised sleeping with him! He's older than well by 20 years but looks like fecking ...
A. 28 March 2014: Do not do it. He is married and he's a lot older and your landlord so the repercussions could be severe. He might not do anything but imagine if his wife found out...she knows where you live (it wouldn't be too hard to figure out). You are probably ... (read in full...)
He stopped talking about this female coworker, what does this mean?
Q. Ever since my husband had learned his younger female coworker was getting a divorce, it was non-stop talk about her for a good year and a half. I would hear she is attractive, why would someone divorce a beautiful woman like her. I would hear ...
A. 21 March 2014: It does sound a bit like perhaps he made a pass at her and was rejected. Either that or he had or has something with her and it did not go well or is still going on. If he's good looking and has the money to keep a mistress, perhaps you should be ... (read in full...)
I'm virtually going to be homeless and this man has hurt me more than I can say! I'm so lost and afraid, how do I cope?
Q. Hi everyone, would love some advice as this issue has gotten to bad its tearing me apart. A few months ago I was a single mum with a one year old. Then a friend ive known for years came into the picture and long story short we moved in with him. I g...
A. 21 March 2014: You are young and you made an error in judgment hoping for the best with someone who seemed great. We all make mistakes. He is not emotionally stable and not doing anything to get better. Your son needs positive influences and you need to be in a ... (read in full...)
Why does my husband call me names and threaten me and then apologize?
Q. My husband is in jail for domestic violence and going to get deported. When I visit him he calls me names and threatens me and makes comments about other women in the room to try and make me feel jealous. After the visit he will call me and ...
A. 21 March 2014: Sorry to hear that the person you love and are married to is in jail for domestic violence. I am assuming he got violent with you and the police were informed and he was arrested. Since he is here illegally or with an expired visa or on a ... (read in full...)
My boy keeps lying to me, but insists that he loves me and only me?
Q. Alright so before you tell me to just "dump his ass", actually think about this. Basically, the guy I'm with right now is the best guy ever. I love him to death. And he loves me. He does so much for me, as do his parents. Through his life, he has a...
A. 21 March 2014: The problem is that it could escalate at some point in the future. Time will tell. It is clear you are not at this point simply going to leave him over this. I would say that in the monogamy paradigm, his behavior is unacceptable. If you are ... (read in full...)
Is this a good time to tell him I have feelings for him?
Q. I've been casually dating a guy I work with for nearly 6mths now. We both work shifts so we see each other when we can. Its great and we get on really well. He had a heart attack 2wks ago and it was touch and go for a while. This has made me realise ...
A. 20 March 2014: I agree that it is best at this point to show your feelings with your actions. You've been dating for six months, so perhaps you know a bit about what he likes to eat and what entertains him. Be there, provide some food, some entertainment but don't ... (read in full...)
I think my husband has a crush at work and its making me uncomfortable
Q. Would anyone else think anything of this? Or am I just being paranoid? My husband of 6 years has recently started a new job. He's been there about 2 months now. He works in a team of 7 others, one Man and six women. For the past 3 weeks he h...
A. 20 March 2014: Oh, I am so very sorry. That is just awful! He has zero discretion and that has to be both hurtful and humiliating. I recommend you confront him once more when you are calm and collected and prepared for a bit of unpleasantness. Let him know that ... (read in full...)
We can't have sex unless we are in a certain position. Is it the height difference?
Q. Hi, I have started having sex w a new guy. He's 6'5" and I'm 5'5". For some reason he can't ever get his dick inside me unless I pull my legs up. Why is that? Is it because of the height differential? I don't get it! ...
A. 20 March 2014: Sounds like a lack of experience. It also sounds mechanical. I tend to not sleep with a man if I sense after the first time or two that he is cold and mechanical. I don't have a lot of patience in that regard. Try talking to him about it, making a ... (read in full...)
Should I get back with my ex even if he took advantage of me financially?
Q. My ex boyfriend broke up with me 4 days ago and after seeing him at work . He texted me Good job tonight and he feels hurt and embarrassed to take a break from relationship. Should I get back with him even if he took financially advantage of me? I...
A. 20 March 2014: You are aware that he took advantage of you financially and that he ended the relationship and hurt you by doing that. Keep your dignity and guard your heart and your future by just saying no and staying away from him. Move forward!... (read in full...)
I feel like my marriage was a mistake
Q. I've only been married 5 months, but I feel like I made a mistake. There are a lot of "factors" to this story that I feel are important to really give you a perspective, so it might be a long, convoluted post, but I'll do my best to get the point ...
A. 19 March 2014: Make living arrangements with your parents or a friend and move out and file for divorce. Pursue your passion with this other man. ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend made fun of me, says I dress to impress other men and then broke up with me!
Q. hello I am Iin desperate need of help! Last night me and my boyfriend got into an argument about him being very critical of everything I wear! He made jokes and basically called me a hoochie!I told him I didnt like Iit and he shouldnt call me that. ...
A. 19 March 2014: He did you a favor by breaking it off. He will probably contact you at some point in the future if you cease all contact because he is abusive (emotionally, for sure...no idea if he is the kind to get physical). If you like being put down, ... (read in full...)
My anxiety gets in the way, what I do to learn to just smile, enjoy being with her and take it as it comes?
Q. I have recently started dating the best girl I've ever met, and I am finding it hard to switch off. I enjoy my time with her, but I have been plagued with anxiety problems from previous breakups and I find it hard not to feel the same about her. ...
A. 19 March 2014: Smile and laugh as often as you can. Find some new things to focus on while she's absent. Find work or take a class of some kind or volunteer somewhere. When the time is right, let her know you have some anxiety related to past breakups and that you ... (read in full...)
He hasn't texted in a week and I'm wondering if I should contact him
Q. So, i met this guy from bbm about 5 months ago. We were having a nice chat. After talked for a long time, i think i kinda like him. He send me a message everyday. He asked about his family and my family, and all of his personal life and ask about ...
A. 18 March 2014: Chat based relationships are not real, in-person relationships. He is probably on to the next flirtation. You know nothing about him. I think it is a wonderful idea for you to get out and get some hobbies, take up dancing, go to church or some other ... (read in full...)
My first reaction was to lie, and it's causing problems now
Q. I’m 32 and my boyfriend is 37. We’ve been together for 8 months, and he moved in with me about 2 months ago. I know it sounds like it happened fast, but it feels right and we’re definitely in love. Here’s the problem: sometimes he goes through my ...
A. 18 March 2014: It is unreasonable for him to go through your phone. That is a violation of your privacy. I think he did you a favor by showing you he is controlling and does not trust you. Your reflex lie is on one level not a big deal, it is sort of a natural ... (read in full...)
He acts like he doesn't know the first thing about me! Should I give up for good?
Q. Some of you may know some of my relationship history with my past questions. I am still back together with my children's father. But still having issues. Nothing has helped and now the little things are starting to get on my nerves. Is it normal to ...
A. 18 March 2014: He is showing you that you are not important to him as a unique individual. He is an inconsiderate, self-centered jerk and you should leave and never look back. If I dated someone with a peanut allergy I would remember that from the first time he ... (read in full...)
What's happened to me? My desire to work has lessened, I'm less happy than I used to be, I'm not interested in the same activities I used to be.
Q. I've noticed something about myself in the last few years that I don't like. My desire to work is lessening. I can't hold a job for more than 6 months, because I just lose all interest in it. I've had a pattern for the last 3 years now: going to ...
A. 18 March 2014: A regular exercise routine would do wonders for your mood. Finding a new hobby to be passionate about would help. Getting a spiritual focus would help. You need some things to feel passionate about. What would you do if you could do anything in the ... (read in full...)
I didn't want this breakup, how do I get over it with my dignity intact?
Q. I've been dating a man for almost a year. On numerous occasions, over the past year, he has asked for time and space bc he is dealing with something stressful with work or his family. I have respected this and have done my best to give him what he ...
A. 18 March 2014: You can regain your dignity by never looking back at him again. Block him from any apps you use. Do not contact him again. In a few months if he reaches out, IGNORE him. He is noncommittal with you, not interested in being in a real relationship. I ... (read in full...)
Looking for opinions on body type and the promotion of a healthy self-image.
Q. I came across an article today and I'm fascinated in general about the latest trend of trying to promote the Average Woman. I put that in caps because I believe it's just a new label for the same problem. http:/...
A. 17 March 2014: Thank you for posting this. The whole "Real Women Have Curves" movement was offensive to me because I was always quite thin. I gained weight in my late 30s and so now I do have curves (and get a lot more attention from men) and I enjoy it very much ... (read in full...)
Should I cut my losses now? My new Bf can't stop oggling women and commenting on them.
Q. I am 38 years old and look after myself and have good self esteem. I have been dating a man the same age for a month. I am finding that whenever we are out he quickly notices an attractive woman and either turns his head when we walk past or ...
A. 17 March 2014: The ogling is completely disrespectful in my book. We are all attracted to beauty, we look at a good looking person, but we avoid doing this when we are on a date or with our significant other. It's creepy to sit there and stare even when you are ... (read in full...)
Would a blood test tell if she were still pregnant?
Q. this is a kind of medical question so i only really want to know if its possible. so basically in early January my sister told me she had just miscarried at 3 and half months. however since then she has yet to get her period. she also has gained ...
A. 17 March 2014: Encourage her to go to the doctor for lack of a period. The hcg hormone is tested by taking a blood sample. It is present during pregnancy and the levels can point to whether it is a normal pregnancy. It is also present for quite a while after a ... (read in full...)
We normally talk every day but last night he didn't answer my phone call!
Q. Hello im in need of help! I just want to make sure im not over reacting. Yesterday me and my boyfriend talked and texted back and forth for most of the day, until about six o clock. We normally talk ever day but last night around 830 I called but he ...
A. 17 March 2014: Texting all day long is very draining and distracting and he needs space. Tone it down a bit. Focus on a hobby, doing things with your friends, and self improvement through whatever you like to do, such as fitness classes, reading, watching ... (read in full...)
My friends don't believe I'm fine with being single!
Q. I have a large group of friends and they're all in relationships apart from me. I am alright with being single, it doesn't matter to me. I tell them I am fine with being single but none of them believe me and try and set me up with the worst guys ...
A. 17 March 2014: Chigirl gave some good advice. I will validate that I have met women who were ok with being single and I knew it was sincere. Some people are just strong in themselves and fine with being single for extended periods of time or even for a lifetime ... (read in full...)
How do I keep her interested in me during her month away?
Q. So I've recently started dating a girl I quite like; we get along well, we enjoy each others company and we can joke around with each other and act coupley. Basically I want to be in a relationship with her. Now there is a problem; we've b...
A. 17 March 2014: Just continue to communicate by text and instant message. Don't be too needy about it, though. Wait for her to reply each time you send a message so it does not look desperate. If she likes you, she'll be thrilled to see you after a month. Be ... (read in full...)
Is 26 too late to start a new life?
Q. I've suffered from serious bouts of depression and anxiety related disorders since I was 18, and used to binge drink regularly to alleviate my woes. I'm almost 26 and I don't know how but i'm managing to overcome this mindset which has made my life ...
A. 17 March 2014: I decided at the age of 26 to get a college education. I was working full time and it took many years to complete, including some breaks, but was worth it. I changed my life. I am still changing my life more than a decade later. Life is about ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend gone off sex
Q. Me and my partner are both 24, we've been together for 5 years. For the past few months, he wont have sex with me, I try to touch him but he'll push me away, say he's tired, make excuses like 'it's too early' 'later' and he has a headache. I've told ...
A. 17 March 2014: I am sorry you are dealing with this. He still has a sex drive and is capable of achieving an erection and ejaculating, so it is not a physical issue. For some reason he is not wanting to be intimate. The spark is gone, perhaps, but you are ... (read in full...)
Is he asking because he wants to scrounge or because he really wants to live with me?
Q. Why is my boyfriend pressuring me to live with him?. My boyfriend is going to be evicted from his house in a couple of months, if he hasn't found another place by then. he said either he will go and live with one of his friends, before the eviction ...
A. 17 March 2014: This sounds like a painful predicament. The red flag is the fact of him threatening to break up with you for not moving in with him. Sometimes when one person wants to take things to the next level, he or she will give an ultimatum like that. Some ... (read in full...)
Feeling horribly guilty after breaking up with my boyfriend.
Q. I broke up with my boyfriend of two years, three weeks ago. I genuinely loved him and felt that we had a solid connection. Yet, throughout the course of our relationship, I had to pay for our $1800/month rent, the bills, and the majority of our ...
A. 16 March 2014: Being mean on occasion by calling you terrible names or insulting you in awful ways is not acceptable. You feel guilty because you feel responsible for him and you love him still, but it seems to me he was using you. It is not out of the question ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wants me to delete pictures of my ex's on Facebook... Is she overreacting or am I being unreasonable?
Q. Hi, I'm sorry to say that this problem is due to Facebook, you probably get lots of these! My girlfriend wants me to delete photos of me and my ex-girlfriends from Facebook. She doesn't seem to like the idea of them being on my page and she say...
A. 16 March 2014: As a woman reading this, I can tell you that I have pictures of my ex on my Facebook (only a couple of them) and pictures of myself with various males that are friends. I would be concerned if a guy I was dating asked me to delete them but I would ... (read in full...)
The love of my life but he blows hot and cold
Q. Iv been in a relationship for over a year and a half now and my boyfriend is a wonderful man,we both had a few bad relationships in the past and but really hurt,but the past few months he tells me he loves me and I have the whole of his heart but he ...
A. 16 March 2014: So there are mood swings? That sounds unpleasant. If he is just working and gone a lot for work, that is one thing. It is puzzling that you have a child but he does not live with you. It does seem he is only able to commit only a third of his time ... (read in full...)
Has he been leading me on, and if so, what should I do now?
Q. I have been talking to a guy I really like for about 2 months now. He always texts me first every single day and calls me a lot, and we talk for hours. He has taken me on a couple dates and he says he really likes me, and he compliments me a lot. I ...
A. 16 March 2014: When he contacts you again, ask him about the post. If they were lyrics he wrote, it is a bit silly to put them up there like that. It probably is a girl and he has feelings for her. We all end up with exes eventually and we all have baggage and we ... (read in full...)
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