Latest articles: Just Two
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
31 March 2011: I recently read something nice that I would like to share.... JUST TWO. Donate blood twice a year. Donate your eyes after death. Thank God twice a day. Write two letters a week. Visit two ailing people a month. Say two words of gratitude-"...
A little humility goes a long way
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
27 March 2011: I’ve been a moderator here on DC for a while and it’s a great forum. It really irritates me though when the OP shows no regard for the aunts who’ve taken time to answer questions. We moderators don’t know you, yet we spend time poring over ever...
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The guy I broke up with is threatening to harm himself if I don't give him a second chance. What can I do?
Q. I broke up with a guy who didn't treat me right. But when I refused I give him a second chance, he threatened to commit suicide. This is worrying me. I told him we could be friends but he did not want to. And he just went from blaming himself and ...
A. 11 July 2012: Lodge a complaint with your local police, with the help of your family. Don't hide this from anyone anymore because now he's just manipulating you because he knows he can scare you. If everyone around knows you what is going on, then he cannot ... (read in full...)
Will I ever be able to forget what he's done to me?
Q. My boyfriend has beat me more than a couple times before and hasn't in a period of time and has told me he wouldn't ever again but I am scared of him im scared a lot of the time and if he gets really mad at me he threatens to choke me or beat me but ...
A. 11 July 2012: Get him of him RIGHT NOW. This is no small matter, if you don't get away from this guy then he will kill you. Please wake up. Unless you get rid of him completely, you will never be able to get over your flashbacks either. Every time you look at ... (read in full...)
Is it realistic to have an ambition to be a porn star? Or is my depression affecting my judgement?
Q. I wish I looked like a pornstar I feel like my life would be so much better if I was beautiful, who out there is beatiful but got dumped? I need to know it doesn't matter, I am so depressed....
A. 8 July 2012: Being beautiful has nothing to do with getting dumped or not. You get dumped if things don't work out, not because of the way you look! If the reverse was true, film actors and porn stars would have everlasting relationships!!
... (read in full...)
Boyfriend mentally abusive because he cannot forget my escort past
Q. This situation is extremely complicated, but here goes. I am currently teetering on the verge of insanity due to an extremely psychologically, and emotionally abusive relationship with a man who cannot forget my past as an escort. I met this man...
A. 5 July 2012: Why are you still with him? What would you rather have? A disastrous, abusive, doomed relationship or being alone and having peace of mind and much deserved freedom? Dont be absurd and say that you still care for him, if you choose your heart over ... (read in full...)
My marriage is crumbling, I have a crush on a guy I went to high school with and I'm contemplating leaving my husband not for the other guy but to make myself happy. Am I doing the right thing?
Q. I'm in a strange place, and I was hoping someone could shed some light.. I am twenty-three years old and have been with my husband now for three and a half years, married for about ten months. Our relationship has been good for the most part. W...
A. 4 July 2012: I agree with the posters who have said that you are letting your depression get the better of you. And I know there's no point saying this now, but you got married way too early. 23 is when you should be exploring life with all its endless ... (read in full...)
She says she loves me yet she doesn't want to walk out of her bad marriage
Q. I have a lady who I have known for 20 some years,she is the wife of an ex-friend, who I had never gotten to know, because of him, he was real jealous and possessive. Well out of the blue he decided to cheat on her, she came to see me one day and ask ...
A. 1 July 2012: What do you want to hear OP? This woman is using you, you are allowing yourself to get used, she wont move out of her marriage, you don't want to move on...its all one big mess. You know what you should do, right? Leave her and move ahead. I don't ... (read in full...)
Can toothpaste get rid of pimples?
Q. Iv starting developing pimples. iv been using a cream but it bleach my skin too much so iv decided to put an end to it even though it helps me. I heard tooth paste can also get rid of pimples. But i dont know how to go about it. Can tooth paste get ...
A. 30 June 2012: I dont know about toothpaste but I use a medicated face wash with salicylic acid and it works just fine. I used to have the odd pimple but ever since I stated using the face wash, I have great skin with absolutely no pimples!... (read in full...)
The fact that I'm completely flat chested is really starting to affect me and my relationships
Q. I'm an 18 year old female and I am completely flat chested...and i am not exaggerating when i say this for effect, i am being completely honest, i have the chest and nipples of a 7 year old boy. I have been on birth control pills for over 2 years...
A. 30 June 2012: As long as its not a health problem, please don't obsess about it. Small breasts are not affecting your relationships, you are ALLOWING yourself to think that they are. Honestly, any guy who is shallow enough to not like you because of your breast ... (read in full...)
Is it fair for my partner to blame me for looking at his emails when I found out he's cheating again?
Q. I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for two and a half years. We have an 8 month old daughter together. We were starting new and moved recently to a new state because of a job opportunity for him. A few months ago I noticed him acting a ...
A. 29 June 2012: How can you expect a cheater to be fair??! Of course its not fair and why are you still waiting around? He's not going to change and you know it. You can move away from him, you're not Siamese twins and you can make a difference to your life...if ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is planning a vacation with his ex-wife, for their daughter's sake. Should I be upset?
Q. Recently, my boyfriend of about 9 months said that he and his ex-wife were planning to take their 5 year old daughter on vacation to Disneyworld. They've been divorced for a few years, and live about three hours apart, but share equal custody of the ...
A. 29 June 2012: I know its a difficult situation to be in, but spare a thought for the child involved! She is entitled to time with her mum and dad because no matter what, they are her parents first and only then are they someone else's partners. You could tag ... (read in full...)
Shattered that it could happen to me twice.
Q. I'm new here. I'm 51 and divorced. This is really for the more mature crowd. I would really like to figure out how this could have happened to me, twice now. My background is I married at 36 and my husband left me, for another woman after 16 y...
A. 29 June 2012: I read your question and the varied responses to it, and the first thought that came into my mind was, why do you even need a man?? Life has been hard to you but you are 51 years old, you've been alone for a large part of your life and have turned ... (read in full...)
My older friend targets younger girls. Should I talk to him about it?
Q. Hello all, I know this opinion may be controversial, but here it goes. My friend just graduated from high school. He's a really cool guy and all but he always goes after girls who are 13 or 14. This is weird to me. I don't mind age differen...
A. 28 June 2012: I dont think this a "friend" you would mind losing, would you? This is a dangerous, twisted guy and what he's doing is WRONG. Its sick to go after girls that young and he's doing it because its easier to score with younger, innocent girls who cant ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend of five years has just left me and I feel like I just lost a huge part of me.
Q. Hello. My serious boyfriend of five years has just left me. Its hard to believe in true love, soul mates and fate, since I thought he was my knight in shining armor. I don't know. I feel so betrayed. He gave up. He let us die without so much of...
A. 27 June 2012: Dont drink and go around kissing random men just to get over the pain, it never helps and you will end up feeling worse about yourself. Get a hold on yourself OP, remember, its not the end of the world. You are an individual first and foremost and ... (read in full...)
He shouts in his sleep, should I tell him what I hear?
Q. Hi there, My boyfriend often has angry dreams at night. Her figits which I why I wake up, then he breathes deeper and faster and then starts shouting and swearing. sometimes its at his dad (his parents are divorced a long time ago) and sometim...
A. 27 June 2012: I think you should tell him so that he can go to a counsellor because his issues are deep seated and will take time to heal. He has been dealing with anger and pain for a long time now and has probably never confronted the issue but has always ... (read in full...)
Is she interested in a threesome or not?
Q. I have discussed with my wife having a threesome. We were watching porn one evening and I asked her if she would prefer mfm or fmf, she said mfm of course if she was to do it and she was not that interested. Ok....I did get an answer. The ...
A. 27 June 2012: Why are you trying to play with fire? Your wife isn't interested and thank your stars for the fact that at least one of you is sane. Respect the sanctity of your marriage and stop pushing other men on your wife. Nope, you're not "just another horny ... (read in full...)
I want to fit in but I don't!
Q. For a long time I've been having a lot of problems with my virginity...I can't stand it. It makes me angry, and I can't stand it...but I met this girl. She's changed my life...made me see that the world isn't as dark and depressing as I thought...I ...
A. 26 June 2012: Where on earth are you getting your facts from? ... (read in full...)
Is my best friend racist? Or am I just being over-sensitive?
Q. Ok so my best friend is Caucasian, and I am African American. I totally understand why she would want to date a white guy, because it is something that I understand the agreements and disagreements of that topic being offensive. But we live in a ...
A. 25 June 2012: You're taking this the wrong way OP. Your friend is being blunt but in a minority where you and your brother are the only African American kids, your skin colour will set you apart and not in a bad way. Don't take it as racism, its just something ... (read in full...)
I've been helping my pregnant sister and she treats me like this?
Q. My life is in such a whirlwind, but i think my biggest thing is my family. My younger sister is currently pregnant and her boyfriend is a complete swine, he didnt even want the baby and i was the one that took the support role for her. I have h...
A. 25 June 2012: Let them all go OP, you have done enough and there's only so much you can take. You have been a wonderful older sister and have supported your sister when she was down in the dumps but clearly its not enough. No matter what you do, the first chance ... (read in full...)
Should I worry about what my coworker(s) hint to me about being slow?
Q. I've been a cashier at a very popular beverage place for about a month now. We're extremely busy and the line goes out the door. One of my coworkers whom I get along great with genuinely let me know that some coworkers have been complaining that I'm ...
A. 25 June 2012: Don't give up, remember that most people will try to pull you down but that doesn't mean that you should give up. As long as your manager doesn't have a problem with you, don't care two hoots about what your co workers say. Their words shouldn't ... (read in full...)
I am being horribly bullied by my ex housemates and I don't know what to do
Q. Hey guys, Just looking for a little support. My head is about to explode. Recently I lived with two people, a guy and a girl I would have considered friends. Some messy events lead to me them moving out and me loosing A LOT of money. Inclu...
A. 22 June 2012: OP stop being foolish and emotional about this and get up and take charge. From what you've told us, they are absolutely in the wrong. You have the legal paper work so you can claim your rights, you don't have to wait for them to do anything. They ... (read in full...)
I accidentally found out that my daughter in law & family do not like me. What do I do now?
Q. This afternoon I had my 10 year old grandson (my son's son)and I took a wrong turn in the car at a junction. He panicked thinking we were going to his other grannys (his mum's mum). On gently questioning him he told me that it would be a bad idea ...
A. 21 June 2012: It hurts to know that someone doesn't like you, but who cares OP? How does their approval matter to you? Do you like everyone who comes your way? And really OP, its no great surprise if your daughter-in-law and her family have an opinion of you, I ... (read in full...)
Is this considered cheating? Help!
Q. Hi, Need help. Is this considered cheating? My fiance and I are 3 months away from the BIG day. I'm 29 and he's 38. Never married and no kids. We're having a coed bechalor/bechalorette party in Las Vegas. We're best friends so we figured i...
A. 20 June 2012: Leave him OP, he's messed up. He's now trying to save face because he sees a real threat in the fact that you might actually call off the wedding. I think this is a very weak man here and surprisingly weak people can be very rigid and staunch in ... (read in full...)
Is this considered cheating? Help!
Q. Hi, Need help. Is this considered cheating? My fiance and I are 3 months away from the BIG day. I'm 29 and he's 38. Never married and no kids. We're having a coed bechalor/bechalorette party in Las Vegas. We're best friends so we figured i...
A. 19 June 2012: Call the wedding off OP. A 38 year old man talking like a fool is not going to make a good husband. I get the feeling this is just the tip of the iceberg, there are bound to be other areas where you disagree because of his ridiculous arguments and ... (read in full...)
The love of my life used to be an escort... can I forgive her?
Q. I met the girl of my dreams... or so I thought. A little background... She is a senior in college and I'm a few years older than she is with a solid career. She is beautiful, intelligent, exciting, fun... she was the perfect woman. I never ...
A. 19 June 2012: OP I'm going to be harsh, but who are you to "forgive" her for her choices? You are not her lord and master and neither is she your slave to forgive!! It was her choice-good, bad or ugly, it was HER decision and you cant and shouldn't make her feel ... (read in full...)
I'm torn between my head- boyfriend, job, house and my heart- family,friends and moments I will never have again..and I don't know what to choose
Q. Hi, Im 20 been living with my boyfriend for 3 years now.i moved from a small town in scotland to a big city to be with him. Everythings been great we get on well and been through so much together. We both have okay jobs here and an okay house. ...
A. 19 June 2012: I can completely relate with you OP, I'm a small town girl too, but I have to like in a huge city away from everyone because of my studies. I hated it, still do and I think I've grown really bitter because of the whole thing...there is a lot of ... (read in full...)
Why out of the blue did he text me saying we needed a break? I need closure!
Q. Hello everyone, I have been dating my boyfriend for 5 years now. Like any other relationships we've had our ups and downs but always work stuff out in a matter of time. We love eachother a lot, my family loves him and his family loves me, etc. ...
A. 17 June 2012: OP you have to let him go because he has clearly made his choice. What was perfect for you was obviously not enough for him and many times, people don't even have a specific reason, they just grow out of the relationship. If you continue pressing ... (read in full...)
I'm jealous and its driving away a good guy
Q. How can I stop being so jealous? I've been hurt badly in past relationships, lied to and cheated on time and time again. I'm now with a wonderful man who treats me better than I ever thought I could be treated, but my jealousy issues are driving him ...
A. 17 June 2012: You have to get a hold on yourself because not only will your obsessive jealousy drive away the guy, it will also make your life miserable. You cant possibly keep a tab on someone all the time and keep doubting them, that's not how it works. When in ... (read in full...)
Have you ever said "I'll love you forever" and then changed your mind?
Q. Hi this is a question going out to all you ladies out there Just wondering if you have ever said ' i love you forever' or ' i want to be with you forever ' or ' i will always be your girl ' to someone you have been in love with? andddd wait for ...
A. 15 June 2012: If she says that she loves you and has never given you any reason to doubt her words, then you shouldn't. But be practical and reasonable about life. Remember that when people fall in love, everyone thinks that it will last "forever". Sometimes it ... (read in full...)
After seeing her ex, she called me his name during sex and now I'm very upset
Q. Ok... hopefully i can get some good advice on this and not people making fun. I have been seeing the most lovely girl for the past few months. Before she was with me, she was in a 4 year relationship with the most awful guy - he hit her, put her...
A. 11 June 2012: I know you're assuming the worst, but I think your girlfriend's right, she didnt mean it. She was just probably really surprised on seeing the guy and he was on her mind because she saw him after ages. The bad memories must have come rushing back ... (read in full...)
I want to be her guy!
Q. Hey people, i am going to come straight to the point. There is this girl in my med school whom i like. One of my other friend also likes her. I actually want to be the alpha male and get her because i genuinely like her. I flirt a lot with her, i ...
A. 9 June 2012: Cindy is right, its difficult to get a Muslim woman to marry you. Religion is a big deal in India and for a Muslim girl to marry a non-Muslim boy is a very difficult challenge! You don't even know if she sees you as a potential boyfriend, so you ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my parents I'm pregnant?
Q. Hey, I need some outside opinions on how I can tell my parents about my pregnancy. I don't want to add to the pressure they are under by telling them I'm 17 weeks pregnant, but it's going to get increasingly hard to hide, and I feel everything is a ...
A. 9 June 2012: You're 17 weeks pregnant, the more you delay telling him, the more awkward it will become. You should have done this the very day you discovered that you were pregnant. Anyway, do it now without any more dilly-dallying. You have nothing to feel ... (read in full...)
What is more important animal attraction or someone who can treat you like a queen?
Q. I am out a long bad relationship. About 6 months now. I have met this super nice guy. He is loving caring and will go anything for me but I'm not sure if I am attracted to him, although we have only have had 5 dates. I can see he is really into me ...
A. 8 June 2012: If this guy really likes you as much as you say, then you should stick it out and see where it goes. Animal attraction is important, I personally cant imagine my relationship without it! But you also have to remember that it does wane with time and ... (read in full...)
Guy with girlfriend keeps trying to string me along!!! I am nobody's puppet!!
Q. HELP!!!! This guy friend has a girlfriend. BUT he keeps trying to string me along!!! I told him I have feelings for him. He told me he has a girlfriend. So that should be the end of it, right? NO!!!! He just keeps giving me hope and then he...
A. 8 June 2012: He's doing it to you because you're allowing him to. Stop giving him any importance and he'll back away and find someone else. Don't try to be "just friends" or anything, that's not possible with water under the bridge. Now that he knows that you ... (read in full...)
I walked out of the room, came back and my friend was having sex with the guy that I like!
Q. so there was this boy who liked me and i felt the same way but we never really acted on it.so recently i invited him over to my place and we ended up sleeping together.so later my bestfriend came over and we were just chilling when i went to get ...
A. 7 June 2012: Forget about the girl, how could the GUY do this to you? He's as much at fault as anyone else! I say get rid of both of them, the girl is no good and neither is the guy. You're better off without both of them. You don't want a guy who humps ... (read in full...)
Was I wrong for letting my 17 year old daughter sleep in the same bed as her male best friend?
Q. I let my daughter's male best friend sleep in her bed with her - am I a bad mother? My daughter and her best friend are 17 and I completely trust my daughter's trust in him. I know she wouldn't do anything because she's too insecure for anything ...
A. 6 June 2012: By allowing your daughter to sleep with her friend, you are allowing her to think that this is accepted behavior which will later only harm her, more than anything else. Today she's sleeping with a friend under your supervision, tomorrow when she ... (read in full...)
My brother told me that he hated me
Q. I've just had a terrible fight with my 17 year old brother. I am 19. I've always helped him out, and have really been nothing but nice to him. He treats me like crap, and today he finally told me he hated me. I am sure he meant it, and I actually ...
A. 6 June 2012: He's being a normal, cranky teenager. Trust me, I know, I have a 21 year old brother, he's the crabbiest old man on this planet but ONLY with his family; with friends he's an entirely different person. He's very moody and irritable most of the time ... (read in full...)
My family feel that if my 27 year old boyfriend is having sex with me, then he should pay for ALL my expenses! And the poor guy does enough already!
Q. Ive been dating my boyfriend almost a year, im 19, he's 27 he also lives 3 hours away but visits every weekend. He pays for 99% of everything when we're together the hotels, dinner, movies, concerts etc. I havent worked in about 5 months i cant ...
A. 2 June 2012: To add to my previous answer, maybe your grandma thinks badly of you because she knows you are having sex with this guy and she cant deal with that. Although, its none of her business! Maybe this is your family's way of 'punishing' you for having ... (read in full...)
My family feel that if my 27 year old boyfriend is having sex with me, then he should pay for ALL my expenses! And the poor guy does enough already!
Q. Ive been dating my boyfriend almost a year, im 19, he's 27 he also lives 3 hours away but visits every weekend. He pays for 99% of everything when we're together the hotels, dinner, movies, concerts etc. I havent worked in about 5 months i cant ...
A. 2 June 2012: I fail to understand why your family is treating you in this way. All I can say is, get out of that house, get a job and have minimal contact with them. I don't think they will change. ... (read in full...)
My family feel that if my 27 year old boyfriend is having sex with me, then he should pay for ALL my expenses! And the poor guy does enough already!
Q. Ive been dating my boyfriend almost a year, im 19, he's 27 he also lives 3 hours away but visits every weekend. He pays for 99% of everything when we're together the hotels, dinner, movies, concerts etc. I havent worked in about 5 months i cant ...
A. 1 June 2012: I find this very hard to deal with and honestly I'm sorry for you. I don't know what culture encourages mothers to talk about their daughter's sex lives. Every parent knows that their child is doing things sexually after a certain age, but to ... (read in full...)
My ex told me I could either tell the guy myself or he would send the picture.
Q. So I made a horrible decision to have intercourse with my ex...for the last time like 3 days ago..after I met a new guy. My ex was stupid and took pictures of me. He then later found out that I was talking to this new guy. So now he said he's going ...
A. 1 June 2012: Your ex wasnt "stupid", you are the one who made a very bad judgement call by having sex with him and then allowing him to take pictures. Look, if he wants he can do anything with the pictures so now its your decision how far you want to go to stop ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend stalks me by using fake FB accounts and it's getting creepy
Q. We've been together since 3 months. The first week we were dating I caught him writing to me from a fake Facebook profile (my friend noticed the profile's page on his Iphone). It was just a smalltalk so I asummed this is normal and wrote some stuff ...
A. 29 May 2012: OK, for now its done. We knew this was coming, the denials and everything. But it doesn't matter, because he is a creep and a liar and not someone you can trust IN THE LEAST.
Please make yourself strong, don't let your emotions get the better o... (read in full...)
My boyfriend stalks me by using fake FB accounts and it's getting creepy
Q. We've been together since 3 months. The first week we were dating I caught him writing to me from a fake Facebook profile (my friend noticed the profile's page on his Iphone). It was just a smalltalk so I asummed this is normal and wrote some stuff ...
A. 28 May 2012: Meet him in a crowded place, do not go to his house or anything. Be sure to let your mom know. I agree that he might not give up easily, chances are that he will be very difficult. Be strong, do not give in no matter what he says, and when you break ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend stalks me by using fake FB accounts and it's getting creepy
Q. We've been together since 3 months. The first week we were dating I caught him writing to me from a fake Facebook profile (my friend noticed the profile's page on his Iphone). It was just a smalltalk so I asummed this is normal and wrote some stuff ...
A. 27 May 2012: OP his "pleasant" behavior is all part of the facade, that is how controlling abusers work. This man is a bit of both, with lots of crazy thrown in! I'm glad you have made the decision of breaking up with up, expect lots of tears and "please dont do ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend stalks me by using fake FB accounts and it's getting creepy
Q. We've been together since 3 months. The first week we were dating I caught him writing to me from a fake Facebook profile (my friend noticed the profile's page on his Iphone). It was just a smalltalk so I asummed this is normal and wrote some stuff ...
A. 27 May 2012: What would you do and is this normal?
I would break up with him This Instant!! His behavior is far from normal and the first time I've heard of something this bizarre.
Do men do this often?
I've never known any guy to do this. Its ridiculous! ... (read in full...)
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