A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello. My name is Jeff, and I have a question that may come off as odd.I've met this beautiful white woman, and she told me she would like to go out on a date with me. As I am black, I have always wondered how it would be like to date a white woman.Problem is, I'm afraid we might get dirty looks from the general populace. What do I do?I thank everyone who helps me out. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2013): You have to be prepared for anything and everything. Do not be fooled or believe that there are not nasty people out there because yes the world is full of them. Learn to deal and cope with it or forget bi racial dating then.
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (15 October 2013):
 Jeff: I've dated white women all of my adult life. I find them to be - for the most part - interesting and loveable creatures.... I expect that you will find the same (about them).....
As for how people will look at you (and her).... Who gives a damn?????
Good luck...
...............................
A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (15 October 2013):
 In 2012 a question with a slightly different emphasis to you was asked. Only that time it was a girl asking the question. At that time the girl was concerned about her own father's attitude.
I think you might find the answers illuminating.
Racists have no place in this world. If people behave in a racist manner they are out of line.
Here are the answers to that previous questions:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/why-cant-i-date-a-black-guy.html
If you care about her and respect her then you should be fine. If it is just curiosity that makes you think she will be different or novel in some way then the relationship may be on shakier ground. Because no matter what color a person's skin may be, no matter what color their hair may be, no matter what color their eyes are, under all that everyone is an individual.
We all have feelings, we all like to be treated with respect and empathy. We can be happy one minute and maybe sad another day. We all know instinctively when we are respected or not. We all sense when we are safe and sometimes we get a feeling that we are not safe.
If you are confident within yourself you will stop seeing the color and only see the person.
There are good and respectful people of all colors in this world.
Just as there are some people who are the opposite of the good people mentioned above.
Go into the relationship with an open mind and feel sad for the racists. They are just ignorant.
...............................
A
male
reader, C. Grant +, writes (15 October 2013):
 There are probably places in Canada where it would draw attention, but not many. Certainly if you're in the larger cities, no one will even notice. Have fun.
...............................
A
female
reader, Soconfusedanymore +, writes (15 October 2013):
 You know what you do? Hold your head up high and hold your girls hand. It really bothers me we are in 2013 and there is still racism. Just because someone doesn't date outside of their race doesn't mean others should be judged for it. People always find some excuse to hate on someone! Who cares what others think. As long as you two are happy that is all that matters. Love doesn't have an age, race, sex, or national origin. Ignore the nay sayers, and be glad you're not as small mnded as them. God bless
...............................
A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (15 October 2013):
Maybe if you live in Alabama or Mississippi.
I've been in a number of mixed relationships and never had a problem. But then again I don't care about the opinions of ignorant people.
...............................
A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (15 October 2013):
 As a gay woman, I know what it's like to be stared at by the general public. You just have to grow a thick skin and not let other people's ignorance affect your happiness.
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (15 October 2013):
 You are both human beings. One of you (you) just have more pigmentation then the other one (she) does.
I have met many "bi-racial" couples in the military it's kind of common and most of them seem to work a lot better then not.( I put that in "" because I don't believe in dividing us into "races" because it separate up, not unite.)
If you like her as a person and want to spend more time with her, then why not go out on a date?
What if people give you dirty looks? You are not doing ANYTHING wrong, neither is she, this isn't the 1800 anymore. Ignore the dirty looks and have a great evening out.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2013): Hi jeff- I will tell you that I am a white woman in my early 40's and I have been married to a black man for the last 23 years!! I won't lie, at first when we started dating back in 1991 (Wow that was a long time ago), we did get some stares and looks. We were living in California at the time. When we moved further north to Oregon for his job, we experienced quite a bit or racism not only because we were a biracial couple but also because of him being a black man. He was not allowed to go to certain areas of the state because of the color of his skin. Nowadays, we encounter racism very rarely. I believe it is more widely accepted. Whether or not where you live it is accepted I wouldn't know. We currently live on the East Coast of the U.S. and encounter many biracial couples.I will say there are still quite a few areas across the United States where this is not so common and we are stared at. We just chalk it up to ignorance.
...............................
|
