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Why this man is acting like this? Jealously? Stupidity? Or am I at fault?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (10 August 2013) 4 Answers - (Newest, 11 August 2013)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Hello, I was wondering if male and female readers would be able to tell me why this man is acting like this? Jealously, stupiidty? or am i at fault?

A colleague at work lead me on to think he was single (found out he was married) then lead me on to think he was divorced ( i called one evening and wife picked up). So he has never been honest about that to me.

He use to be my bodyguard always look out for me and i use to LOVE working with him. We had a flirty relationship and i use to think he fancied me to. He is twenty years older than me though!

But rumours began spreading (any conversation he had would involve me in ajokey way) so i told him people think we are flirting and i don't feel that way . He was fine about it stating people may believe what is/not real. Since then he has been horrid!

Shouting, flipping, attempting to back stab me with a manager. He has found out i now have a bf... He piles alot of work on me. I had booked the afternoon of to see BF, he then purposely amends a appointment for the PM saying manager has said i have to go with him to it. (manager said she did not say this ).

He saw me on the phone to the guy, walked past on three different occasions within two minutes and then says admin are puttin a cal through me...they said they only had a message not a call i had no missed calls!

He said oh got important info to tell you about the case but would not tell me kept delaying it... I don;t know why he is being like this!!! been there nearly 10 months he has never kissed me or even asked me out so why be like this now?

View related questions: at work, divorce, flirt, jealous

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (11 August 2013):

I know how you feel , I am going through same thing.

He is a loser who thought he would hook on to someone young, beautiful and impressionable. Being young does not mean we are daft though.

Next time, keep it professional, that is what I'm doing from now on.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2013):

He's creating a hostile working environment.

Tell him calmly in front of another work colleague that he is close to that he seems to have an agenda against you because you want to keep your relationship with him professional. This will embarrass him and stop him doing it again. Also give him a warning that from now on, you are documenting a log of the lies or unprofessional things he is doing which you will present to the HR manager in a formal harassment complaint.

Next time, try to keep professional relationships platonic.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2013):

Explain the situation 1:1 to your manager. State you feel harassed and would like to be removed working directly with him. He is 20 years older and knows exactly how to manipulate you.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (10 August 2013):

Honeypie agony auntBecause he is an ass.

Yes, he might be jealous, because 1. you turned him down, 2. you caught him in not one bot 2 lies and now... you DARE to have a BF on your own.

I'd be extra careful around this one.

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