A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My ex fiancé left me for someone else two years ago. He always said he wanted to be friends. Recently, him and I connected over Facebook and began a friendship for the past three months. He was nice at first but when I told him out I had a boyfriend. He became extremely rude and mean. He apparently wanted to see if him and I had a spark if we see each other in a year. We are in two different countries. Due to covid who knows when itll be safe to travel. I told him I didn’t want to risk my current relationship and take a chance again. His rudeness just increased. I don’t understand he isn’t interested in me now and he is not in love with me? As he said! Why is he mad that I moved on?? When he did not want me. I don’t want to stay in his back pocket.!!I really enjoy him as a person and I actually wanted a real friendship from him. Why is he not happy for me???
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (26 July 2020):
 I think if you WANT your current relationship to BE healthy and work out, you NEED to let this ex go and block him. He is not looking out for your best interest or for your new relationship.
He was hoping to re-kindle something with you, maybe because he has no one else and YOU will do until he finds someone else. You know, USE YOU.
He isn't going to WANT to be friends. He can't BE your friend because he is ONLY concerned with himself. And honestly? Someone who gets MAD at you for having a new partner IS NOT going to be a good friend.
And YOU won't TRULY let him go, he will always get to live rent-free in your head if you try and keep him around "as a friend".
He has shown you CLEARLY that 1. he isn't looking to be YOUR friend, 2. He isn't being a decent person.
He made a choice when the two of you broke up. And so did you. Go back to no contact. Stop keeping old partners in your life "as friends". It's not good for your current relationship and quite frankly it's a bit unfair. HOW would you feel if your current BF had some EX (who still liked him) hanging around? It wouldn't feel great at all!
So LET him go, wish him well and block him.
A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  + ♥, writes (26 July 2020):
 Because you were his fallback, his "plan B" and now he no longer has one. He is annoyed that you did not just sit and wait for him.
Good on you for moving on. Trust your gut instinct and don't go back to something which didn't work before, unless you want to go through the heartache again. You wouldn't read a book again and expect a different ending.
Sadly I think staying friends with this guy is not a good idea because he wants something different. Concentrate on your current relationship and let your ex go. You can make new friends.
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A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (26 July 2020):
 Maybe he has just come out of a relationship and thought he would try to reconnect with an old flame.
It did not work the first time around, so the chances are it is not going to work second time around. He left you for someone else, this alone should be enough reason to not start anything with him again.
He has shown his true colours by becoming extremely rude and mean when he learned the fact that you had a boyfriend, this really is not someone that you want and need in your life.
You say " why is he not happy for you"?. He is an ex from two years ago who left you for someone else, does it really matter what he thinks?. i would say absolutely not.
My advice would be to stop contact with him and not talk to him again, block him on social media.
Concentrate on your present relationship and leave old relationships in the past where they belong.
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A
female
reader, BettyBoup +, writes (26 July 2020):
 He is like a child, having a tantrum because someone else is playing with his toy. He wasn't playing with the toy anyway, but when he remembered he had the toy and was thinking about maybe playing with it again, he found out that someone else is playing with it now, and he's furious! That toy(you) was his! How dare anyone else play with it?! Outrageous!
He is immature, and can't control his emotions. I don't think he would make a good friend if he can't get over himself being butthurt over another man having you now. He didn't want you, you've moved on. He needs to accept that.
I do think he had intentions of friendship anyway. I believe that he was testing the waters to meet up with you and starting a romantic or sexual relationship somewhere in the future. He found out that you've moved on and threw his toys out of the pram. Tough luck fella!
Even if he is a cool person, and you'd like to be friends, it sounds like that's not a good idea. He can't handle you moving on. You don't deserve to be spoken to rudely and meanly. Move on. There's loads of cool people out there who would make better friends than this guy.
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