A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Why does my Pastor ignore me? I started going along to a new Church with my Son's now ex gf. The Church seemed great, pastor was very friendly. Then I had a accident so couldn't get out for a few weeks. I have tried reaching out to him via text or call and he blanks me. The thing I found frustrating about this he was always responding to my son's gf or going to meet her, or sending her little encouraging texts. But I couldn't get a reply at all! My son's gf recently stopped all contact with me too and split with my son and I think this new pastor ia everything to do with it. She is in her 20s, very beautiful and I think he is being stupid spending all this time with her for a married man in his position it is worrying for me to see. Them tagging each other on FB, photos together and she's not just attending the Church now but helping him out through the week too now. My son told her he thought she was spending far too much time with him. And he is no pastor as he couldn't help me. I guess I'm not young or pretty enough. Then she sent dumped him and told him he was out of order. I honestly think they are having an affair and even though he's a pastor he's closer to his own desires than God in my eyes. Not the first time he has been accused of Cheating on his wife either but he kept his position. As no one believes him. I want to defend my son and tell them both what I think but is there any point. My son's ex won't even speak to me now and before I took her to that Church she was like a daughter to me. I'm broken by this and so is my son.
View related questions:
affair, ex girlfriend, married man, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2016): So this girl had a good boyfriend her own age? A family of in-laws that loved her. Then she threw it all away for some married pastor 2x her age? She is either very naïve or stupid. Or he could be the one manipulating her, as you said he doesn't sound Christian at all. Once he has either had his fill off her or the next pretty thing comes along i can guarantee he will drop her, and sorry she deserves it if this is true. Where is the girl that accused him last time, did he paint her as liar to save his own skin. She thinks he won't do it too her? Bind your time her karma will come and guess who she will come crying to.
A
female
reader, Eagle'sfan1986  +, writes (18 November 2016):
I read your post. I think the pastor is a perverted if he is having affair with the girl who was supposed to be your son's gf. But meddling will be very wrong also if you confront his gf on Facebook or whatever media you have. I will defiantly move to a new church since this one isn't treating you very well. As for girl she will regret how she treated your son by dumping him for a gross older married man. I am so sure your son will find someone new soon.
...............................
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (16 November 2016):
 You cannot be certain that they are having an affair, even if he was accused off it before, does not mean it is or was true.
She is your son's ex girlfriend now, so really has nothing more to do with you. Yes it is hurtful as you treated her like a daughter. But breakups do happen. You need to remove her from social media.
As for the pastor if you and your son are calling him a cheat that could be why he does not want to spend time with you. Also having it all over Facebook usually means that they have nothing to hide. Either way delete him from social media as well.
Then get yourself a new church with a new pastor and hopefully you will get comfort from there.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2016): Don't involve yourself in your son's personal-life. The issues between him and his girlfriend is for them to resolve.
If she dumped your son, it is for the best. If she's carrying on an affair with the minister as you suspect; good riddance to bad rubbish. If the minister ignores you, it's probably because he is not practicing his faith, and doing his job. Maybe he's too busy dipping his wick into the female congregation. When the truth comes to light, it will be through scandal and shame. He will lose all credibility, his wife and family, his position, and his congregation.
Just remember, this is only speculation. You haven't seen it with your own eyes; so don't go spreading gossip.
If it turns out you are entirely wrong, and misread everything; you will the source of defamation of character.
Its best to disassociate, and move on. That includes your son.
Your son is better off without her, if she is cheating. He can go find a new girlfriend, and you can find a new church.
...............................
A
female
reader, Flower89  +, writes (16 November 2016):
 I would be breathing a sigh of relief tbh. At least you both know what she is like and how quick she ran off, I guess the Pastor has a shiny car and fancy suit? Tells you what you need to know about her. Just be glad he never married or had kids with her. Break all ties and let her fall into her own mess. I'm sure his wife and other Church members are watching too. You don't need to do a thing the truth will come out. You just find yourself a good Church and better Pastor who does actually serve God.
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (16 November 2016):
 If I were you I'd go find myself another church. This one doesn't seem to give you any kind of joy, comfort or support.
As for the ex-GF - she might have dumped your boy for the pastor, she might not. However, it really is irrelevant. It is not your job to guess what's going on between those two or to judge or to confront. She might be pretty, but that doesn't mean she is a good person, does it?
Remove them both from your Facebook and find yourself a church with a pastor that is “worth one’s salt”.
The sooner you and your son remove her AND him (the pastor) from your lives the sooner you can both mend and move on.
...............................
|
