A
female
age
30-35,
*lueeyedbabe
writes:I recently went to a party and got really drunk, I had a few people stay over and ended up sleeping with a boy from my school. The only problem is that he has a girlfriend in the year below. I really dont know what to do. Am i in the wrong,is he in the wrong or is it equal? I dont want there to be tention between us 3 but i have no idea what to do.
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male
reader, Richard_EMids +, writes (25 October 2007):
 Well - when I was in my teens these sort of occurrences happened all the time, dating or not. Lots of "one-offs." Especially at or after parties/gatherings etc. so don't beat yourself up over it. In fact I would say the opposite - remember it with some joy - if you both wanted it. But reflect and improve. Remember what can happen if you have too much to drink (or smoke). Think about the risk of preganancy and be prepared. Think about the risk of disease and be prepared. Learn about what sort of behaviour you feel OK with the following day/week.
A
female
reader, need help here i am +, writes (25 October 2007):
well to be honest i would have to say equal as you both have to take the responsability to tell the truth to his girlfriend if i was his girlfriend i would truly want to know about this as i dont want to go out with a boy who would do such a thing if he acts like this when he is drunk nothing would really change when he is older but i would rather be told from both of you personaly rather than rumors about this going round the school you should own up and be truthfull about this or you will dig a deeper hole in this situation and if you just own up to this now you will be able to cleer this off your chest and will be able to sleep easier at night knowing you dont have to keep this secret anymore. I hope this has give you confidence to tell the truth about this and just think before you act next time even if your a bit drunk. good luck remember what i said.
yours sincerely need help here i am
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2007): You're both in the wrong. Sorry if that's not what you want to hear because clearly you were trying to eliminate yourself from blame. Getting so drunk that you sleep with someone who you know already has a girlfriend is not normal behaviour, especially for someone your age. I really hope you have the intelligence not to do this again. Learn from your mistakes, spare a thought for the poor young girl who doesn't know her boyfriend slept with someone else - someone from the same school(!), and then move on.
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A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (25 October 2007):
 I think you do nothing here and learn the lesson about the demon drink. We all have poor judgement after alcohol so it is best to stay in control by not getting drunk. He wouldn't make great boyfriend material because as you say he has a girlfriend already and this means he cheated...he would do the same to you and blame it on being wasted at the time.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2007): I think you were both in the wrong. You should never have too much to drink that you enter in sex with a bloke, full stop! What if you are pregnant, was it protected sex? He was in the wrong for taking advantage also. So you both in the wrong. Just make sure that in the future you dont get drunk and dont do this again. If i was you i would now keep quiet about it. What can you gain? You will ruin their relationship, if it isnt ruined already. Just move on and forget about it and vow never to do it again.
take care
xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2007): There's no one wrong and there's no one right in this situation!!! You were both drunk, made a silly mistake and just move on forget about it!
If it makes you feel any better, speak to the guy in private and explain to him it was one off mistake and that it won't be happening agian. That you want to remain friends (if you are friends)
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A
male
reader, AirRevenant  +, writes (25 October 2007):
 If he is the person in a relationship he should have been more careful with his decisions to go to a party and sleep with someone other than his girlfriend. It may have been a poor decision on your part also but you don't have the same obligations that he does and he should be well aware of that. I suggest avoiding further intimate contact with him and seeing how he treats the situation. Hopefully he will be honest with her but not tell her who it was, then everybody could move on from the situation.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2007): well i dont think your in the wrong here he was the one who took advantage of someone who was drunk and even cheat on his girlfriend just let things settle down and remember please wear condoms and not get too drunk in the futer also remember its not your fault
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