A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I live in a fairly small area (an island) and worked in a charity shop which I enjoyed however for the second time one of the managers decided to open his own shop. The first manager and one of the workers opened their own shop. The second manager also has done the same and I helped him with a few donations then went away for a long holiday to come back and told by the charity shop I HAD been helping that I cant work for them anymore.I am upset because there was a small element of social life from the first shop, the unfortunate thing is the second shop is just literally a few yards from the one I DID work in - he should have found on in a different area and I can see why the original one is a bit upset.HOWEVER because I canot work for them I dont want to work for the other one either even though we were quite friendlySo now because I wanted to help BOTH I have lsot out and dont want to work for either.Where do I go from here I seem to have lost my "friendly colleagues" and there arent anymore and I do not want the locals turning on me saying I was wrong to help the next manager.What shall I do? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Ciar  + ♥, writes (28 July 2012):
 Find someone else to help. Somone or some group entirely unrelated to the first bunch. Say nothing about any of this to anyone and if it's ever brought up by anyone else, whatever you do say should be positive and upbeat.
Speculating with others about the why's and what for's will only nurture the issue and allow it to grow.
It might be a good idea to consider potential conflicts of interest before you engage. YOU may not intend any harm, but you've got to consider how things may appear to others (I guess that's what you're doing now by refusing to help out at the new place - a wise choice).
A
female
reader, Abella  +, writes (28 July 2012):
 Time can often heal these splits. Though not always.
And a small island is like a family. And Family animosities can run very deep. And hurts can be long remembered.
And sometimes one door closing is the opportunity to encourage us to consider opening a New Door to new possibilities
I am so sorry that all this has gone pear shape.
If it is a small island it may not be viable for others to try to successfully run more than one shop that is very similar. So there may be a time later when you can give them support when one or more of the new businesses falter.
And as a small island everyone would know everyone I guess everyone is aware of the tension.
Is it an island that gets many visitors? And tourists? If yes then have you considered starting a "come and stay" tourist operation where you create one really nice bedroom and access to a bathroom. Then shared use of your livign space and a nice breakast each morning. While they tour the island at their own pace for the rest of the day?
You could set up a nice little business. And allow you to meet nice well heeled tourists from all over the world who want to discover what it is like to live on your island?
Alternatively you could start writing a book of fiction about a small community where the events start to get out of hand. Though the characters can do anything you like. And the outcomes can be entirely different. Throw in a film crew who come to make a film, where the 60 year old hero of the film falls in love with a local lady also 60, and tries to convince her to leave her beloved island but she refuses. And so therefore he decides to......
And as a result she .......
You could have a bestseller on your hands.
Could you start an online course to develop or learn a new skill?
Start creating hand printed silk fabric to buy online?
There are other ways you can reach out to people,
and it is very sad that this chapter in your life has closed. But there are many other exciting possibilities out there for you to enjoy.
best wishes for the future.
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