A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Do guys make girls pass "tests" to see if they are worth dating or whatever? The guy I like was dumped when his girlfriend went to college because she wanted to have freedom to date whoever. He hasn't dated anyone since, just had a bunch of random half drunken hookups and I know from his guy friends that he's really hesitant about dating someone again because he doesn't want to get hurt. We talk every day (he texts me first at least half the time) and we have hung out, but sometimes it seems like we won't see each other for awhile, and when we could be he ends up doing things with his friends instead even though he could be seeing me. I wonder if this is to get my reaction. (Like he says "I didn't even want to go out, I'd rather see you but I felt bad") In the fall I will be in college and he'll be working so if we did date it would be long distance. I don't know if he's testing me to see if I'm gonna be like "well if you can't find time for me I'll find someone who will?" Or is he seeing how I will be with him when I go to college and we can't see each other or does he just not like me that much and doesn't want to hang out with me? He knows I have other guys that are interested in me so its not like I have to settle for him cuz noone else likes me.
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female
reader, deirdre  +, writes (29 July 2012):
no guy who is genuinely interested in a girl would make her do any kind of ''test''
A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2012): It's nothing like that at all OP, he's just clearly not interested in relationship with you at all.
You seem to be under the impression that he's just being cautious based on his past or maybe you're hoping that's it, but I can tell you safely that avoiding you and blowing you off to spend time with his friends instead is not being cautious, it's just being not interested.
OP even the most cautiously guarded man will want to spend time with you if he likes you.
Now if by some magic he is interested and is avoiding because he knows he can't have you, which he definitely can't seeing as there is no chance in hell he will do an LDR, then that's also not a good thing and it also means nothing is going to happen here.
You need to move on OP, you say you have other guys interested, well if any of them interest you then you're better off giving one of them a try.
He's not testing you OP, this is just a no-go. Move on to guy who is more suited and interested.
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