A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've fallen in love before, I've had my share of boyfriends and I thought there were no surprises on how falling in love happens to me.I have never been a believer of the so-called "love at first sight". I thought things at first sight were purely physical attraction. However, two weeks ago, everything changed. I went to a meeting in another country. It was for people working in the same field. There I met N. I was already familiar with his work, which is brilliant, and from the amount of things he'd done so far, I was expecting him to be at least 50 years old. However, he is only 4 years older than me and I felt incredibly attracted to him. This has some complications, because he is way ahead of me in the professional "hierarchy", he's "a boss". And I didn't want to send the wrong message (as in "i will do anything to work for you"). And although he is so young, he is one of the most respected people in this field of work.This meeting had about 80 people and lasted for one week. For professional reasons, I was interested in the things he's been developing, so on friday I gathered the courage to ask him my (work-related) questions. For some reason, I became a 14 girl. My hands were shaking, I was loosing my verbal skills, I was about to explode. Fortunately it was not a total disaster, because he seemed very shy as well.On the next day there was a farewell barbecue, and only about 20 people were there. When I was about to leave, he came to me, so we had the chance to talk about work a little more. I finally was myself, more relaxed, with my usual smile and sense of humor. He asked non-work-related questions about myself, the I-wanna-know-everything-about-you-but-it-seems-we-don't-have-enough-time type of questions. We got to know each other a little (very little... too little). Saying goodbye, I went for a handshake, and he gently caressed my hand in what became the longest-weirdest handshake ever made. While doing this, he asked me to send him an email. He repeated this about 4 or 5 times ("why don't you send me an email? Please, send me an email. Really, send me an email"). Later that day, he ran into me again while I was talking to 2 other people. From this point, I have no idea what these 2 other people were talking about because N. came, put himself behind those 2 and looked me in the eyes with the sweetest smile on his face for a loooooooooong time... He just stood there, silently. I smiled back, but after a while (the 2 people noticed something was happening) I got shy and couldn't bare to continue looking at him without melting into a puddle of honey. So I drew my eyes to the floor, feeling really embarrassed.That was the last time I saw him. On tuesday evening, I finally sent him an email. It was strictly professional, since I don't know to what extent I may have misinterpreted his signals.But to be honest, I don't really want to work for him anymore. Right now I just want to get to know him better. My email was warm and polite but if he was indeed flirting with me on saturday, it may have sounded a little distant and cold, since it was perhaps too formal. Until today he hasn't replied yet. Why would he insist on me sending him an email and not reply? Since he is incredibly busy and I had some questions about work which require that he takes some time to think about solutions, maybe I'm just being paranoid and he'll reply once he has the chance.I thought about sending him another email next wednesday if he doesn't reply in the meantime. I will NOT send anything like "why didn't you reply?" or "have you read my last email?". I thought about something like "There are some things that I forgot to mention in my last email" and take it from there.But this time, I want to add something between the lines. Revealing but not too revealing. Something to let him know that I'd like to get to know him better, I'd like to see him again.... without scaring him off (because I have no idea if he feels the same).... And here's where I need advice. What can I write?This may be totally silly, because we barely know each other, but what I felt while talking to him was really special. There was some kind of chemistry, sparks and fireworks, feels-like-first-time-I'm-in-love kind of thing. I need to know if it was just a momentary thing or if there is something more. He lives in another country, but not that far, plane tickets are cheap and I consider going there for touristic reasons soon, anyway. What can I say in an email, without sounding too pushy or eager, but letting him know that whatever the reason that made him be so sweet towards me, I'm feeling exactly the same, and I want to see him again soon?
View related questions:
cheap, flirt, shy, spark Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2009): Thank you so much, Gina and Mimisoph. Tomorrow evening it'll be a week since I sent the first email. The waiting is killing me, but I don't want to rush a second email. On the other hand, I cannot stop thinking about him and I shouldn't postpone this any longer. If he's not interested, the sooner I know, the better. Ah well, I'll keep you posted on my delusional soap-opera. Once again, thank you. You are both great! Your replies are giving me the push I needed.
A
female
reader, mimisoph3  +, writes (8 June 2009):
 i think his interested.i mean if he wasnt intrested then why would he tell u to email him and have the time to reply..if u feel eager then send him another email saying wat u wanted to say something u didnt mention in the last email and i honestly cant tell u wat to say u have to speak from the heart who cares if ur eager..u should just say things like oh when we have the next meeting if u know the place we should get some free time through our crazy schedual and just get to know each other..say anything that involves u guys getting to know each other and if he says that would be lovely or him sounding excited that u know his intrested..good luck if u have any questions im here
...............................
|
