A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:What advice would you give to an unattractive girl? Not beauty advice but life and dating advice Reply to this Question
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female
reader, 0occoo  +, writes (23 October 2011):
 Everyone is ugly to someone, but also amazingly attractive to someone else.
Firstly, be confident. If he rejects you he simply is not worth it.
Smile at him, but mean the smile. Look at him for about 3 seconds or so, then look away and smile slightly (blushing also helps if you can blush)
Dress in something that can flatter your figure and wear sexy underwear. He probably will not see your underwear, but it will make you feel sexy.
Get his number/skype/whatever and start to talk with him too.
Good luck!
A
female
reader, noraynoray  +, writes (21 October 2011):
"There are no ugly women, only lazy ones." - Coco Chanel ;)
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (21 October 2011):
 who said you are unattractive?
if you think you are ugly and have low self-esteem or body dysmorphia I can and will STRONGLY recommend counseling to work through the feelings.
I have body dysmorphia and think I am fat. I'm a size 6 and I'm TINY... but I feel fat. I see a therapist for this...
IF someone said something to you about it, well then ignore them.. beauty is in the eye of the beholder..
The best thing you can do for yourself is groom yourself well. Dress comfortably for yourself and your lifestyle... do not try to be something you are not.. find your style. IF you like jeans and boots.. wear good fitting stuff... it's NOT fashion sense.. it's about being comfortable in your own skin.. DO NOT compromise your integrity to be something you are not. IF you prefer skirts and leggings... again dress appropriately... nothing too tight or too short.
Get out there... make friends.. take classes.. find a hobby..... get a puppy and find a dog park to go and take puppy classes for training it's a GREAT way to meet folks... and if you get into say agility with the pup you get exercise too.
FWIW, my grandmother used to say "there is a cover for every pot" and she's right... one man's ugly is another's beautiful.... AND as someone gets to know your beautiful insides even if you are not the societal standard of beautiful you become beautiful to them...
my boyfriend did not find me physically attractive when we started dating.... but I offered him companionship and sex (long complicated story)... that was a year ago... NOW if you ask him, I'm the most beautiful thing in the world... and hon I'm past 50 with wrinkles, laugh lines, gray hair and crummy teeth.. I wear glasses.... my hair is frizzy and short... and he's in his 30s...
do not think you will be alone... make yourself a full life and the rest will work itself out!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2011): Ignore whoever said you are ugly if you have acne. I have genetic adult acne, and I am beautiful :) I wouldnt question it, and I get plenty of compliments and male attention. Acne is just something that can sting self esteem a bit, and if its out of control you will want to see a derm to try and prevent pain or scarring, but overall just take good care of your skin. A lil coverup can do wonders as well on bad days ;)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2011): Beauty is subjective. There is no such thing as an ugly person. You may look at the person you find the prettiest ever and someone else might think shes a dog. Its life. Of course the opposite is true as well. There are always people who will find you beautiful and people who wont. But you should NEVER be one who doesnt! You are beautiful and you need to learn to believe it. Stay fit, take care of your skin and hair, be good to yourself. Try to find the things you like best about your appearance and focus on that. Men LOVE confident girls.. And it makes your life much happier and easier overall. Write yourself thoughtful, supportive messages for you to find, or one somewhere you will see everyday. My friend has one on her mirror saying "remember, you are better than you think you are". Try making your own little calendar of them, one for each day to build yourself up. Learn to love yourself just the way you are and you will find that many others will as well.
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A
female
reader, Candid Cally +, writes (21 October 2011):
Be confident.Ensure you have good hygiene (fresh breath, smell good but not overpoweringly of perfume, cologne, etc.)Smile and mean it! :-)Be yourself.who you are goes much further with people than how you look
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (21 October 2011):
 For the purposes of this answer, I'll take at face value your statement about ugliness, but you should probably get a second opinion from someone who knows you and who you trust to be objective.
First, maximize what you do have. Stay fit, dress nicely, wear your hair long, that sort of thing. It'll help enormously.
Second, the rule of thumb is that *getting* a man is 80% about your looks and 20% about your personality, but *keeping* a man is exactly the opposite (assuming you've picked a decent guy in the first place; if not, no amount of good looks and personality will do the trick). So, while getting a serious date (meaning, one looking for a girlfriend, not one looking for a quick lay) may be more difficult, keeping one once you find him doesn't have to be.
List out the aspects of your personality that are good, then figure out how much the kind of man you want would value each of those traits. As a hint, men are generally looking for their complement, not their precise match. That means you don't have to share every interest and skill. For instance, I enjoy cooking and am good at it, so I don't much care if anyone I date can cook. On the other hand, I tend to fall into a rut with my daily routine, so a girl who always has an idea for something new to do earns a lot of points.
List out some of your bad qualities (don't go overboard with self-doubt here; just a couple to start with will do). Work to improve them - the more girls share any given flaw, the more you can stand out for having fixed it. For example, most girls your age are flaky and unreliable. If you always show up on time for dates and promptly return calls and texts, you'll really stand out to a guy.
Lastly, guys are incredibly varied in what they like. If you don't believe me, go to a porn site and look at the sheer number of categories listed besides "big-boobed blonde bisexuals." Trust me, there are men out there who will find you attractive. The trick is to find one you like in return. Be patient, and learn to enjoy being single - the biggest favor you can do for yourself is knowing how to be content in any situation.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2011): you can never be ugly especially if you are a girl .trust me guys love every variety,tall/short,fat/thin,big boobs/small boobs,less ass/more ass,any type of skinunles if u have acne or something ,go to a dermatologist n get ridall facial structures,and any kindof nose lips hair that you have.men like all types of women,but you have to 1.keep urself clean and presentable,2.dress yourself well ,look stylish.3.be confidant of yourself this is most important because biologically men and women get attracted to confidant opp. sexits all in the mind honey,even i used to feel ugly..later i realised that my own idea of beauty is wrong,now i feel sufficient and positive.if you FEEL beautiful then people will percieve you as beautiful..unlike men ,women have this aura of magnetic attraction ,nomatter what you have and dont you are a female!the rest lies in your confidance...if you keep thinking ur ugly,you will act negative,have communiction problems and feel unwanted jealousy /insecurity ,be rude etc..and these things repel men ..its like showing a gun to him So first stop feeling ugly.be grateful to god for what you have and naturally,an air of positiveness,chirpy ,happy you will come out.and that attracts men like crazy.a woman who can be happy ,full of life,active in bed etc.makes a man feel contenti have the same problem as you im not very confidant ..however since i know these things i try my best :) good luck
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (21 October 2011):
 Do not think of yourself as unattractive. You can be attractive to someone, but above all, think of yourself as caring, sweet, intelligent, friendly - whatever may apply. Everyone is beautiful in their own way.
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A
female
reader, shrodingerscat +, writes (21 October 2011):
 Play up your strengths. Are you good at something? Talk about that.Be positive. No one likes a Negative Nancy.Diversify your interests. Make sure you can talk to almost anybody about -something-.Dress your body well. No matter what shape you're in, you CAN dress well to camouflage many body flaws.Don't allow yourself to fall in love too quickly. Moving fast in a relationship can destroy what might have become a good thing.
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