A
female
age
30-35,
*llie_uk
writes:well, em recently (lke 2 weeks) been seeing this amazing guy which i am very very attracted to. we have been intimate and become close. but in front of his mates and people when he is chattin to them on the phone he says " oh i'm with a friend at the moment...that gurl." He's realy sweet and alwais hints about future stuff that we could do like... invite all my mate round his house an have a party ... well we're not really gf and bf..bf but i presumed we were. although i have no intention of pressurizing him in a realtionship... but i dont want to be used just for sex tho and when his bored sumeone 2 chat to. although he has told me in the past that he never showed his emotions to his past girlfriends and thats why they left him. but at the moment he texts only when i have texted.. soo if i don't text for 2 days... he wont text me or call. im not sure wether he is playing hard to get??? or just to busy or not intrested ??? soooooo plz help meee jennnnn!!!!!!!!!!!
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male
reader, Neboraic +, writes (9 January 2008):
I think hes wants as close as friends can be but doesnt want to cross the line to become a boyfriend. It sounds like hes being lazy with you, meaning he likes you but not enough to make any moves, like a tv show that you like enough to watch but not enough to buy.
All is not lost though, maybe he does like you and needs a push. This would require you to make a move, to tell him that you like him and try to force things forward. It sounds like youre already a couple in the non physical ways. Many girls wish they had the intimacy with their boyfriends. If his only fault is he needs a push now and again then consider yourself lucky. I hope he doesnt turn out to be the lazy guy i mentioned in paragraph 1.
A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (9 January 2008):
 You are still very young to be thinking about commitment and two weeks is far too early to sleep with someone without knowing where this relationship is going. Men in general are not always in touch with their emotions either like us girls, yes you are right you don't want to be his sex buddy either. I also think with his past girlfriends leaving him because of his emotional issues is not a good sign if he has a history of a non committal relationships.
Follow your heart, if you are not comfortable with the way things are. Ask him outright whether he is going to have a long term relationship with you, if you get the answer you do not want to hear, then I think it is time to move on and find a guy who is proud to call you his girlfriend. Good luck my love and let me know the out come. Ok? Dusky xxx.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2008): just ask him where you stand!
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A
male
reader, Dazzerg +, writes (9 January 2008):
 Or somewhere in between...it seems to me you are in quite a grey area. From what you are saying he isnt playing hard to get because it seems to me like he has commitment issues that have existed before you; maybe, assuming he is the same age as you, he doesnt feel ready to settle but that doesnt mean he doesnt like you.
In general I would proceed with caution on this one and try not to invest too much but it appears you have already invested quite alot. If you are feeling really uneasy then just come out and ask him. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (9 January 2008):
 I don't have a clue from what you have written. If you really wanted to find out, you could NOT text him and wait for him to make the next move, though. That would be one way to figure out if he likes you and is willing to chase you for a change. Good Luck with everything.
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