A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I don’t know what to think anymore. My gf broke up few months ago but we talk daily and still love each other. However due to pandemic it has been hard to move forward. However I have just realised she does talk to me but barely answers. It’s so one worded. She said she was playing games. So I wrote a few lines of my concerns. And she just replied with one word. She never focuses on the whole convo. Sounds weird right, like a girl showing no interest. But she says she’s not talking to any guys just an older married friend she has been talking to for past year. She will send minimal messages. Thing is I love her but I wish she could just tell me. She has never been a liar. She speaks to her friends, aunties etc and they discourage her, I’m sure. But they are type people who struggle in lives and don’t have solid partners.Me on other hand, it’s all inside me. I don’t talk to anyone I don’t want to hear negativity and they don’t understand.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2021): Your goal ought not to be to find ways to "let her go". She is already gone, you don't have to 'let' her.
Your goal should not be about 'to stop caring'.
Your goal should be to learn as much as you deem useful from having known her, particularly about yourself, about your way of handling things, any potentially erroneous preconceived notions, which mistakes of yours were brought about by your not realizing that you are not owed an answer, or a thought.. That when she was there, she chose to be there, when she replied, she chose to have a conversation, and we are not owed a reason why all of it suddenly stops.
When you'll have learned enough, your brain and your heart will both deem you ready to move on.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2021): Original poster here: I’m not that bad as you guys make out. Can I tell you the honest truth? If god promised me she would be with a man who looked after her, married her and stayed with her until the end of time making her happy, I would happily never ever speak to her again. Yes I will let go, but it hurts me if someone hurts or uses her. You guys are right. I need to stop caring.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious + ♥, writes (18 April 2021):
 You do realize that, if you had gone "no contact" when you broke you, you would be well on the way to healing by now, if not completely healed and ready to move on. Because you have chosen to stay in contact, you are still no further forward in your healing process than you were when you broke you.
Still, better late than never. Stop contacting her. Ignore her if she contacts you. Start putting yourself and your wellbeing first. You cannot have a healthy future if you hold onto an unhealthy past.
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A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (18 April 2021):
 I think if you all of a sudden stopped sending messages you would never hear from her again.
It would probably be easier all round if she simply did not reply to you, or cut you off. I can't see the point of replying back to you with short one word answers, this is keeping you dangling by a thread.
She is essentially playing games with you OP, she has no intention what so ever of rekindling this relationship, so my advice would be to forget her and move on with your life. Onwards and upwards OP.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (17 April 2021):
 OP, it's over.
Time to let her go so YOU can heal and move on.
Tell her you feel it's better to cut contact so YOU can heal and move on. That you wish her well and happiness.
The longer you KEEP her in your life the longer it will take before you are ready to meet someone who WANTS to be with you and YOU want to be with.
And the longer you keep her in your life the MORE possible partners you miss out on meeting.
She isn't looking to rekindle ANYTHING with you. I'm sorry to be blunt here. But she doesn't sound like she is really engaging in the conversations. She is just BARELY engaging. The BARE minimum of replies. Like someone who isn't interested in talking to you. Who would probably be VERY OK with not talking to you ever again?
Time for you to heal, to accept it's over. To work on you.
Chin up.
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