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Using my friend to make my crush jealous. Big mistake?

Tagged as: Crushes, Friends<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 August 2012) 4 Answers - (Newest, 26 August 2012)
A male United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Girl A is a girl that I use to be very friendly with. She and I would talk very often and she would unmistakably say flirtateous stuff to get a rise out of me. I was convinced that she had a thing for me. One day, I tried asking her out but she completely turned me down. That wasn't even the worse part. I guess after realizing that I had a real thing for her, she decided to go cold turkey on me. She no longer spoke or looked at me anymore, even when I tried to talk to her. Needless to say, this hurt me very deeply.

I decided to just let go and forget about her. I have now made a new friend (girl B). She and I get along great. We spend a lot of time together and it seems to fly by so quickly. I can honestly say that I am not attracted to her. I think she's pretty and has a great body but I don't feel that special something with her. I felt that with girl A. Well, I noticed something the other day. As girl B and I was walking by, I made a little joke and girl B started to laugh. I glanced to my side and noticed girl A staring at me. I quickly snapped my head forward and kept walking.

On another ocassion, I was walking with girl B again, having a great time. A friend of mines said that he saw girl A happen to pass a few feet behind us and kept staring at us for a good 10-15 seconds before walking away with an irritated expression. I was strangely satisfied with her reaction. I know it's childish but I decided to play it up a bit. Every time we walked by her I would make a joke to girl B and she would laugh to it, oblivious to my hidden agenda.

I was starting to enjoy seeing girl's A reaction as I kept pushing the fact that I could move on easily from her if I wanted. It was to the point where girl A would glance at me several times as she walked by even when girl B wasn't around. There was even this one time that she came directly up to me and was about to say something but she decided against it and walked away.

The problem is that in the times that I have been playfully flirting with my friend, I think that she may be taking me seriously. I mean I did stuff like tug on her hair and bump into her. She would even wip her hair back and forth, daring me to grab it. She would also take me to the clothing section and ask me if I thought this would look good on her. She even asked why I'm not with anyone right now and if there's anyone I know at the moment that I would like to date. I don't see her as anything but a good friend but I do enjoy messing with her to get a rise out of girl A. Do you think that my friend may be starting to like me? I don't want to lead her on, I just wanted to mess with girl A's head a bit. Should I stop?

View related questions: crush, flirt, jealous, move on

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2012):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thank you all for your answers.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2012):

OP you are frankly what gives men a bad name. OP you are honestly giving this woman a lot of grief and in my honest opinion you frankly OP you deserve what you get.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (25 August 2012):

Honeypie agony auntPlaying games is usually a mistake, and it's lame.

If she all of a sudden seems interested because you are with someone else ( or she think you are) does that seem like she is a decent person?

Don't do this to girl B. That is just sleazy.

And girl A, OK so she isn't interested so what? Find someone who IS. Sometimes you got to kiss a few frogs, get a few rejections, date a few people to find someone worth all the trouble.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2012):

That's pretty pathetic childish shit right there OP.

So you get rejected by A and then use/lead on B to try and make her jealous?

Girl A had a lucky escape and I feel sorry for girl B because her "friend" is actually a bit of a douche.

My advice? Man up, stop being a game playing pussy, take rejection on the chin and stop acting like a low life.

Girl B did nothing to deserve being treated like a tool and girl A only rejected you because she's not interested so you start to act like a bit of a spoiled child and throw your toys out of the pram in a huff.

You're a game playing, head wrecking, childish ass OP and you need to grow up.

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