A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok, so here's the deal.About a month ago my girlfriend broke up with me. About two weeks ago, she was acting like nothing was wrong and was all touchy-feely to the extent that people have been asking if we were going back out. Its hard to just ignore her and try not to see her, because we go to the same school, which happens to be ridiculously small. I don't understand why she's doing this, but it leads into the second part of my question.There's another girl who I know likes me... a lot. A group of us went to the movies the other night and throughout the whole thing she was trying to hold my hand and stuff. We've txted back and forth and I think I gave her the wrong impression. I don't really want to be in a relationship right now, and even if I did, I never looked at her that way. I don't know how to tell her that. Even if I did want to be with her I wouldn't right now, I still have strong feelings for my ex-girlfriend, and it wouldn't be fair to this new girl.Oh, and ever since I started talking to this girl, my exgirlfriend has been flirting and calling me increasingly. One of our mutual friends told me she was jealous, but she broke up with me! I'm just confused about it all.
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 September 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionalright, so i talked to both of them.
First the girl who like me, then my ex. The girl who liked me took it pretty well, she's already after someone else.
With my ex, that's where it gets complicated. She's openly bisexual, that doesn't bother me. What bothers me is that she told me that she still likes me a lot, and wants to be with me... but she's with a girl right now, and they've been best friends for two years. I don't think it will last, my ex's parents (who loved me) have forbidden her from seeing, talking to, or having anything to do with her.
This girl has tried to kill herself in the past, most recently about three weeks ago, and just got home from the hospital.
The thing is, my ex told me there's still a chance for us, but she's still with this girl. I think she doesnt want to lose her friendship with her... what do you think?
A
female
reader, Cyg79 +, writes (27 September 2008):
 First decided if you want your ex back. If not, be public about telling her your not dating any more. In other words let people know, otherwise they wont know what conclusions to draw. If you do want your ex back, then ask her was is going on? Personally it seems like she is playing games, but that’s not for me to decided.
As for the second girl there is nothing wrong with telling her, your sorry if she got the wrong impression but your not looking for a relationship right now. You can say more or less if you want. Just be clear about your feelings and it will save a lot of drama in the end.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (27 September 2008):
You need to talk to both of them and set them both straight.First the girl that fancies you. Take her to one side and talk to her. Tell her that although she's a lovely girl and you like her as a friend, you don't want a relationship and still have feelings for your ex.Second talk to your ex. Ask her what the hell is going on! Does she want you back? If not then tell her to stop using you as a plaything. It's not fair and it's not nice.Good Luck!! xx
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