A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My ex fiance and i are monogomous with each other but arent together, although we hope to be. Sometimes im very happy with him other times i think hes with me because its easier, we dont have to pay rent and he uses my car cuz his broke down. But right now he is supporting us, me and our children, so maybe im just over thinking it. But the thing is he says he wants to be with me yet we arent even bf/gf, but then he says we are dating. I have been helping him start his business, its not profitable yet. I spend most of my time addressing his needs. I love him so much and he says he loves me. But ive decided if we havent become anything more by august, then i will just start focusing on myself more and him less. Getting a career, etc. Is it normal to feel this way? I feel like im going back and forth on my decisions. Am i doing the right thing? If not what should i do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2012): Im the op. I have talked to him about it and he keeps saying he wants to be sure. We have had various rough patches through the 3 years of our relationship. What really makes me insecure is the fact that right now there isnt commitment. For all i know he could be flirting or even taking breaks with women hes interested in while im home taking care of our children and household. I just dont want him to say all of this and then just end up leaving while all my efforts would be for me to start all over again.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (6 June 2012):
 Off course it is normal to feel this way and you are completely right. If it was me then I would want commitment as well from him. Why leave it until August? Why not just talk to him now and ask him what the story is with the both of you, you are pretty much living as a couple just without the title. But if it was me I would want that, so I can see why you would want that as well. Talk it over with him see what he has to say, tell him what it is that you want.
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