A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:For the past few months I have been very close friends with this boy. As you have probably guessed, I like him alot. The thing is, he is a real flirt and alot of girls also like him. We open up to eachother alot. He tells me that he flirts to give himself confidence, and that he is scared of starting a relationship with a friend/confessing his feelings because each time he has done so, he has ruined the friendship. He knows me better than anyone, however probably not vise-versa. He always hugs me and we get on extremely well, infact just yesterday he came to my classroom in the morning and hugged me asking if I missed him (he had been on holiday for a week.)I replied with "no", as a joke, and he said "you're a terrible liar." Alot of my friends, and even people who I hardly know think that it's obvious that he likes me. He asked my best friend who I like, and he always asks me too. However today he kept going on about a girl who he kind of likes, his description of her sounded just like me, but then he mentioned she was friends with someone. I am not friends with that someone. I don't know if he was doing it to make me jealous, or whether he was being genuine. He is so confusing! He is always charming other girls, and recently he has been flirting with me more than usual, so I just feel like yet another girl to him. He also said once that he always really nervous to make a first move. If it helps, he is nearly two years older than me. He is in the year above me in school (although we are round about the same maturity level.) My birthday is in august, and his is in september. Please help me! I have no idea what to do or think! Should I risk confessing my feelings?
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female
reader, robinp93401  +, writes (22 October 2009):
You absolutely tell him how you feel. We are ALL insecure in some way and fear rejection. However, it is extremely important for you to know that he might reject YOU. You need to prepare yourself for whatever his response is. If he rejects you and you really care for him and want him as a friend, take it in stride and tell him just that but tell him you had to try and things are great between the two of you, that his friendship is important to you. If he tells you that he feels the same about you.....WOOHOO!!! Life sucks when we end up saying "I should have..." You could end up getting exactly what you want :) At the very least, you'll end up with a great friend who knows how honest you are with him. Maybe, after all of his "hints" he's waiting for you to make the first move. Guys take rejection much harder than girls. Every time you take the initiative, you empower yourself, you grow stronger. When the day comes that you're together, you can always jokingly say "I made the first move" :)
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