A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am soooo confusedplease can you help me asap!! before tomorrow if you cani am 15 and i am a virgin and i like this boy alot and he want to take my virginity really baaaad but i think thats all he wants to do but im not sure.hes 16 and has had sex already and ive known him for almost a tr now and i really really like him and i think i want to lose my virginity to him what should i do?i dnt know anymore what to think?i kinda want to get it over with but im scared im not sure why thoughthe pain and the blood is that always for everyone? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, kitty_3  +, writes (6 June 2009):
 oh, yay! me too! you made the right choice and you should be proud... not everyone is strong enough to say no.
A
female
reader, jalmetha +, writes (6 June 2009):
 YEAH!!! I'm soooo proud of you!!!
Wait until you can be with someone who won't start pouting when you don't give him what he wants!!!
I'm so happy for you!
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A
female
reader, niki20 +, writes (6 June 2009):
 you did do the right thing. especially if you feel you did, and him not talking to you def. proves it. good job!!!!!!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much everyone
i didnt do it :S
i hope i made the right choice
i feel like i did.
he isnt talking to me as much as he was before but i guess that just proves it.
thank you again everyone xx
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A
female
reader, shaniquas3 +, writes (5 June 2009):
no your body is your temple.give it to somebody who you love and truust.im 16 and im a virgin.if i can do it you can do it!
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female
reader, shaniquas3 +, writes (5 June 2009):
NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!im a 16 year old girl and i got a bangin body and boys want to take my virginity to and CONSTANTLY beg..listen lil mama..ur body is a temple!!!dnt do it and dnt give into the temptation of it..who cares if everybody is doing it...DARE TO BE DIFFERENT.DON"T!!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): At least give it to someone who loves you whom you love back and to someone who waited..and please..you are very young to be involving in activities like that. Run away tomorrow and never show yourself to him again...
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): He's not a good boy and he does not care about you at all. When I was 15 my boyfriend loved and respected me and guess what, he NEVER pressured me to have sex, even after 4 years of dating. Please don't do this. He just wants to brag to his friends and then pass you on to his friends. You'll have a bad reputation and an even worse self-esteem, which can lead to even worse things. You should not feel an urgency to make this decision. I wish I could punch him in the face for treating you like a cheap slut. Unless you are one, but I could tell by the fact you are on here, that you are a nice girl who wants to be loved like everyone else. This isn't him sweetie, but he's out there, I promise you just have to be patient and wait for him.
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female
reader, iSmil3y +, writes (4 June 2009):
Honestly, Don't do it! I don't think that sounds like a good way to lose your virginity. Wait until you're actually with someone you love and someone who actually cares about you and loves you. He just wants you for sex, so I wouldn't do it. I don't think you should give your virginity to a guy that way. Please, wait until you're with someone who you actually love before you lose your virginity.
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A
female
reader, jalmetha +, writes (4 June 2009):
My dear, PLEASE DON'T.If you have this much doubt, it is a red flag that you should not. Beleive me, there are a lot of guys who use a score card as to how many virgins they can have. You didn't say he wants YOU really bad, he wants your virginity. Think of his personality traits. Is he a gossip or a braggard? Why would he tell to you that he has had sex before? Intimincy is between you and who you share yourself with, he should not be telling you about his previous experiences to ease your fears. Do you love him or is it his begging that is getting to you? Think of your most trusted secret, if you would hestiate telling him, why would you get naked infront of him? More important, why would you give him the only gift that that you can't buy or can ever replace. Lastly, don't ever think of losing your virginity as something to get over with. Its not like busting a zit, a little pain and it is over with. People remember who they lost their viriginty to all of their lives. Think, do you want to remember this guy when you are 45? Besides, where do you plan to sleep with him? You deserve to be in an envirnoment that is comfortable and will put you at ease, not a twin sized bed in his room hoping that his parents don't show up. Please think carefully before you do so.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): I didnt have blood the first time... but it did kinda hurt.... After a while though it feels realllly good :) Um... I wouldnt do it, personally. if thats all he wants from you hes gonna hump ya and dump ya girly and you will be lonely and embarrassed when its all over with. you should find somebody to be in a relationship with before you have sex. if he wanted to be your man before and after you had sex like a monogomous relationship; that'd be different. But you dont want to lose it to someone who doesnt really care about you.... trust me! do other stuff with him if you want like oral or whatever, but dont have sex. STD's play a role.... getting caught, and pregnancy do too. there are so many adult responsibilities that go along with sex if you arent ready for those.. thats just another reason why you shouldnt do it.
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female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (4 June 2009):
 Icelordess is so right. So calm down, relax, you don't have to do anything at all. What on earth is the rush?
Right. You say you are confused. So let's take a look at the immediate situation and then what the outcome of what your choice(s) might be.
Option A. You go ahead and lose your virginity to him and he falls in love with you and you are together forever. What are the chances of this happening? How will you feel? Will you regret this choice?
Option B. You go ahead and lose your virginity to him and you two date for a while but then after a month or two it's over. What are the chances of this happening? How will you feel? Will you regret this choice?
Option C. You go ahead and lose your virginity to him and he is really nice on the day but the next day he ignores you mostly other than to say hi and then goes off with his friends. What are the chances of this happening? How will you feel? Will you regret this choice?
Option D. You go ahead and lose your virginity to him. You get pregnant because the condom breaks. You know the rest of the questions, only I have to add, what will you do?
Option E. You decide to wait a bit and get to know him better. Maybe actually become boyfriend and girlfriend. Then you know him better and don't feel the need to ask the aunts here because you'll already know the answer.
Option F. You decide to wait until you know for certain that you are with the right guy because you know for certain that you will have no regrets.
Option G. You suddenly realize that lots of guys want to be the first. (Can I tell you a little secret? Some of the guys who sleep around a lot but never seem to actually find the right girl like to be with girls who don't know anything about sex. Why is that? Because then the girls won't realize that the guy actually doesn't know very much about making the girl feel special and good, and is more focused on his own pleasure. That he's actually kind of crappy in bed. By the time they figure that out, he's long gone and is working on the next conquest.)
So I'm wondering that if you're feeling confused and scared, why you feel the need to rush? He might be making you feel that you are only going to get close to him if you go through with this; when you grow a bit older, you'll realize that lots of guys pull this little manipulation.
So, work it through all the way to the end. And by the end, I don't mean the actual act. I mean the stuff that comes after you two both go home. Would you be able to talk to your mom about what you did? If yes, then you're probably just fine. If no, well, maybe you should think about it a bit longer.
No worries, no rush, you have ALL kinds of time.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): The fact that you have to ask says a lot about your NOT being ready. You CANNOT do it confused because you'll regret it and feel like dirt afterwards no matter how much you enjoy it (that is if you do enjoy it at all). Sex is not something you do because you want it sooo bad. That is just inmature. I guarantee you every man on earth wants to have sex with you no matter your looks. Hasn't your mother taught you anything about men? Men are only after your vagina and will do or say anything to be satisfied and then run. It will happen for the rest of your life. You have to be wise. Have self esteem and say no. You should wait for the right person to give up your virginity and a guy who plans to have sex with you in advance it's not worth it. Sex happens naturally between two consenting adults WHO LOVE EACH OTHER.Remember you will never be virgin again and will always remember your first time. Do you want to remmeber your first time with a guy you gave your all and then ran as if you were used tiolet paper? Learning to control your sexual urges is part of being a mature adult. If you cannot control them then you are a kid still and kids don't have sex.You can get lots of sexually transmitted diseases WITH A CONDOM also. Like herpes: an incurable virus that most of the time doesn't show symptoms.
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A
female
reader, solovley  +, writes (4 June 2009):
dont do it. that sounds like an awful way to lose your virginity. it sounds like it means alot to you and you deserve to look back at a romantic story that will mean something to you. i am really happy with the story i have when i think about it and i feel sorry for my friends who dont have such happy stories and try to forget that unhappy memory. its one of the few things in life you'll really remember so make sure its right. dont feel presured because you have the night togther or anything, and he wont like you any more if you do it, in fact he'll probably like you less because the chase is over. good luck and follow your heart x
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): If you're ever in any sort of doubt WHATSOEVER as to whether or not you should engage in secual activity.. then the answer is NO.
Losing your virginity is not something that people want to "get over with."
If you're not sure, then please don't do it. Some guys just get a kick out of taking girls' virginity and don't have good intentions.
This is absolutely not something you want to end up regretting. Please take y our time here.
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A
female
reader, kitty_3 +, writes (4 June 2009):
if you think that taking your virginity may be all this guy wants you definitely shouldn't do it.
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A
male
reader, Livelife +, writes (4 June 2009):
Please wait. Don't let him wanting it force you into doing it. It's a very big, very important decision, and if you're worried, then you should *absolutely* wait.I know you like him, and I know it seems like he'll like you more if you let him, but if that's all he wants you would be really hurt, and the fact that he's pressuring you makes it sound as though that's all he's after.Losing your virginity shouldn't be something you are so scared of that you just want to 'get it over with', it's something you want to be special I'm sure. Please consider all that and wait. It will probably be painful, and the amount of blood depends on the person, both those things depend on the person really. It's a different experience for everyone, but not one you should give to someone you're not sure of, or at a time you're not sure about.If you have any more questions, you can always message anyone on here for more advice. Please consider what I wrote carefully, if you are unsure, wait.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): You are second guessing having sex with him. You really like him, he doesn't seem that interested in you, meaning he probably won't stick around. Do you really want to lose something special with someone who isn't so special or who doesn't see you as special. Sex with a loved one I believe is so much better than with someone thats just there, they are more patient and understanding. Wouldn't you rather have that? You don't seem comfortable with the idea of having sex with him, you are searching for someone to cheer you on, but I don't think you'll find that on this site. But in the end, it's your choice. Just think about it, what it will mean to you, what it will mean to him, and what the end result will be.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): No do not lose it to him!! I know losing it is the 'in' thing cos everyone else seems to be doing it, but this guy is not worth giving it to. Plese have some respect for yourself and wait until you're in a relationship with a guy you love and trust. I can gaurantee that you'll regret if you lose it to him. You like him but he just wants you for sex, don't settle for that!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): do u want to bleed and be humiliated for the rest of ur life? how about getting blood everywhere. how about possibly getting pregnant. what happens if u get pregnant? awful thing. dont have sex. period. u'll thank me for this!
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A
female
reader, kaylagal +, writes (4 June 2009):
 Please don't do it. Your first time should be with someone who is madly in love with you, and you with him. Your first time should not be forced. It sounds like he's not really into you, and just wants to sleep with you, which is common with guys that age. And they don't even know what they are doing anyway, so it will be a waste of your time.
You are also still very young, and still have a lot to learn in life. Leave this boy alone. And lastly although this sounds like a cliche, it's true - if he really likes you, he will wait.
good luck
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A
female
reader, niki20 +, writes (4 June 2009):
pain varies, you might not even have a hymen anymore, it can tear w/ excersise gymnastics, etc......blood that varies to but changes from girl to girl. i dont think you should loose it he only wants to have sex w/ u to brag that he took it. wait for someone you actually love. it will be that much special.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): OMG WE'RE LIKE THE SAMEEEE :D Dude, don't pleasepleasepleaseplease don't do it ;_; Haha i kno im a stranger but don't do it. First of all, don't u think ur gonna be ashamed of urself when u get older? Don't you want to have the OONCE OONCE with someone when ur ollddderrr? I know *he will* he'll try to force you, foreplay try to coax you but don't fall for it. No matter how good he trys to convince you, just tell him you don't want to, and if he likes you for him not to do it. And if he doesn't listen just keep telling him no and do whatever you can to make it go thru his horny skull. The reason you're scared to have OONCE OONCE with this boy is because, well, you don't want to, and I'm glad that you are. Otherwise you would be a... *can't say* So please, I spent like... 10 minutes trying to figure out what to say because... I care :) Don't do it. Please :) And if he doesn't listen to you say no, he's not the right guy for you, even tho you really like him. You don't want to loose ur virginity, trust me ;_; So don't do it for yourself :D
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A
female
reader, local_celeb2011 +, writes (4 June 2009):
Listen gurl.
Really think about this. You will remember this the rest of your life and you will want it to be with someone you honestly do LOVE. I thought I loved the guy I lost my virginity to and we were together two years and now I regret it everyday. He said he really loved me and dumb me I believed him. And after he got what he wanted he thought he owned me.
I won't bore you with my stories, but please think about if he's the one.
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