A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hiya,I've been thinking about asking my bf of 5 months to marry me...I'm very confused, i am 24 and have been with my new (29 yr old) boyfriend for 5 months. We are very close and very much in love and moved in with each other very shortly after getting together, and he can cope with my menagerie of animals! I had only just come out of a 6yr relationship with my fiance when we met, but it was a relationship that had gone full term for me, and which we both left on relatively good terms. I know that i love him very deeply and we get on brilliantly, and i know that he feels the same way. He asked me to marry him very soon after we met, and i, never one to really think marriage was great, said yes, but we both decided in the end to wait a while, and try again later. We figured that a month of being together after both of us being in a relationship just two months previous thought it'd be too much for our friends, family and previous partners to really cope with. And that using our common sense should wait a while.But now it's been over 4 months and its been sitting on my mind for a while, going round and round... I really love him, and i know he really loves me, we see a future together and want to buy a house this year if we can get the money together.Basically, my question is, should i ask him to marry me?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2009): yes I think you should ask him to married you.But got ? me and this guy we only been dating for a month in half and I love him thinking married little bit too soon to be thinking that.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2009): What's the rush? Marriage is forever. It seems silly and impulsive to force the issue after only a few months. It sounds like you have a great relationship, just enjoy it!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2009): Hiya, i'm the one who wrote this, just thought i'd add that the previous releationship was one of 6 years, and we were engaged for 5 of those better never had enough money to actually do it.. though i think it was more that i was never truly happy about the idea of marriage and money was more of an excuse.I'd always thought it was just a piece of paper, but i feel differently about it now, i don't really know why, i just feel more at peace with this relationship and more complete than i ever really did in my last one... if that makes any sense... We understand everything about each other, i feel like i know him as well if not better than my previous partner and i've known him for considerably less time.Thanks for your answers so far, i'm still unsure what to do but i will let you know when i make a decision. :)Thanks
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (17 April 2009):
This is going to be the second time you have been engaged within a year.... what does that say to you, your friends and family and him?
When you say you want to propose, do you actually want to get married within 2 years?
If you just want a ring on your finger and a sign of commitment then have a chat and get him to tell you he'll be with you seriously.
You have already move INCREDIBLY fast and you are talking about taking on a LIFETIME of debt with him.
I am not saying that it's not love, and I am not saying that you two won't be together for ever and ever, but if you rush into this then you risk cheapening it.
Give it time, enjoy what you have now, enjoy the build up or hinting at rings, and getting to know each other's style in everything.
Talk about the future and make sure you have the same life goals the same feelings the same views on all the important things.
Engagement is the intention to marry in the near future, so unless you have been through some tough times, some distance, some stress and some illness and you've come through stronger after seeing his bad side, then why rush into it?
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, SophiaB  +, writes (17 April 2009):
 5 Months together is a very short amount of time! But if you think it is the right thing to do, and it is what you want that will make you happy, then go for it. Just be careful though, because most relationships start out perfect, and you are very much in love at the start, but people can change. So just make sure that you get to know the "real him" before proposing!SB
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A
female
reader, PeanutButter +, writes (17 April 2009):
 You should do whatever you feel is comfortable and feels right - hell, my husband proposed to me 3 days after we met, we've now been together 3 years and married for over 2 of them! His philosophy was that he was never going to love me more than he did at the time and that people who get married after 10 years do it because they feel they should, he did it because he knew he wanted to! I thought that was sweet! Our families were shocked to say the least and some warned us both to be careful and not rush, but i was never one for marriage - i was in a 4 year relationship with my sons dad and never wanted to marry him although we were young and engaged for about 5 minutes before i saw sense, then i was in a relationship for 4 years with another guy who was lovely but i still didnt see marriage and babies or anything with, then i met my husband and it was like HELL YEH marriage, babies, houses, everything, and i obviously said yes straight away when he asked me because i just knew it was right. Whatever you decide, have fun with it, cherish the moment and GOOD LUCK!!!!!xxxxxxxx
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