A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:Been in a relationship for two years, am 63, she is 58, I work one job she has one full time job an a part time job. I pretty much live with her, own my own house to.what's up is maybe sex once every two months, she always got an excuse.she just wants to cuddle, am a horny guy, kissing and cuddling is great but I want sex, she will only take the head in her mouth, she says she can't take more then that,she sure can take food in her mouth a lot futher, should a guy break up with a woman over not enough sex
View related questions:
horny, kissing Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2019): Having sex every two months is one thing. The blow jobs is another.
If you're not getting the sex you want and you can't get over it, then yes- end the relationship. But this doesn't mean the weight of the problem lies with her. She just want want sex as often as you, there's nothing wrong with that. As for blowjobs, well, more women then you might think don't like to do it all. You're lucky she puts the head in.
I'd normally suggest trying to compromise in some way, but I don't see how you could!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2019): What an awful comment about taking food in her mouth - she's not obligated to give it to you and maybe she doesn't want to. I think she's not fulfilled in your sex life, maybe you could be more affectionate with her and do nice things for her. I certainly wouldn't want to have sex with a guy who made such comments on oral sex, for one, so maybe it's the way you approach it. I'm curious whether you return the favour, or do things to get her in the mood? I definitely think it's wortha conversation because maybe this is something you can both work on together - tell her that she needs to be honest (she may be inclined to not hurt your feelings but if this is something that you can improve on, she needs to be open about what she likes. However if she genuinely has a low sex drive or just can't be attracted/compatible with you sexually, then you might both be better off breaking up, and there's nothing wrong with breaking up if that is the case
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2019): You need to cuddle and do romantic things for her.Be really clean shower and brush your teeth and put on some good smelling after shave but please do not gob it on.Bring her flowers.Tell her you love her.Do your share and maybe even more of the housework....It is more work than you think.If she is working two jobs and doing all of the housework i can really see why you do not get any.Ask her to see her doctor.Sometimes as women age sex can be very painfull. There is help for that.Most importantly do not be a selfish lover.listen to her find out her wants and likes and put her first.Be patient.Even if you break up with her because you think more of your penis instead of her heart I tell you it would be like this with every woman you meet.Put her feelings first the rest will follow.
...............................
A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice + ♥, writes (21 January 2019):
 I'm going to be blunt and weather the scorn of the women here. There are 2 reasons a woman lives in a sexless relationship (less than 10 x per year)
1) She doesn't like having sex.
2) She doesn't like having sex with you.
There is nothing you can do to change either of those things. The emotional need that you have for sexual intercourse will never be met.
You should have left her about 18 months ago.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2019): I have a female friend who isn’t into sex with her make partner because... he’s so awful at it that it’s a chore for her. She tries to tell him gently to spare his feelings by explaining more of what she wants: cuddling, gentleness, feeling loved. But he’s pretty much selfish and just wants to get off. Thus, it’s a chore for her.
Maybe you need to work on being good at sex/making love, so she’s turned on by you. It sounds like you’re a terrible lover and that could be the problem. If you don’t improve it’s not likely any woman will be into you sexually.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2019): What an immature comment regarding oral sex and food.
I have a question for you. What effort do you put in to give her what she wants? Cuddling I may add is her way of telling you that she wants to get close to you. You can add alittle light touching to this or even a massage. This is what gets women turned on.
The straight out demand for sex is a total turn off to a woman so I'm sorry to tell you. You may be the reason she doesn't want sex from you because all you think of is yourself.
A woman likes to know that hjer man has her pleasure as a priority.
Maybe try this. You may be surprised by the results.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2019): Putting pressure on someone to give you more sex can be a big turn off for them. In my experience women respond much better to genuine affection. Put some honest effort into making her happy and making her feel good and loved. If she wants to cuddle, then cuddle. Maybe give her a massage, light candles, etc. If you make a woman feel loved, she’s much more likely to try to make you feel loved in return.As for your oral sex concerns, I don’t think you’re going to get very far by complaining about it. It all comes back to the give and take of love and affection. She gives you oral sex because she wants to make you feel good. If you’re greatful, then she will feel good too, everyone is happy, and she’ll want to do it more. If your UNGRATEFUL and you COMPLAIN, then no one is happy, and she’s unlikely to want to do it AT ALL, nevermind better! It’s okay to tell her what you like or don’t like but ALWAYS be greatful when she TRIES to make you feel good. In any case, some women simply can’t give deep head. That can get better over time, but I wouldn’t count on it...To summarize, in my humble opinion, LOVE your partner and she will love you back. I hope that helps...
...............................
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (21 January 2019):
 I'm sorry, but I've never heard of a guy making the distinction that since a woman can swallow food "a lot fuller", that she should take an entire penis and not just the tip of it.
You *do* realize you really REALLY don't want to make that kind of distinction, right?? We women use our TEETH on our food and chew it until it's soft enough to swallow. Shall she chew your penis until *it* is soft enough to swallow? No?? I didn't think so!
Otherwise, she's in her 50's, works 2 jobs, and has a horny 60-year old guy demanding sexual favors constantly! YES, break up with her! She needs someone more her speed, and you need someone who doesn't work and likes giving oral sex!
Now in your defense, I couldn't get by with sex only once every couple of months either, but sex isn't anyone's to demand. At your age and hers, it's normal for libido to slow down a bit. Do you use Viagra to prop up your sex life? If so, you may want to back off a bit. Also, she may need relief from her part time job. Let her cut her work schedule if she wants to, and maybe hormone replacement therapy would help restore some of that pre-menopausal desire as well.
...............................
A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  + ♥, writes (21 January 2019):
 So, when she wants to cuddle, do YOU accommodate HER happily, or do you sigh and do it with bad grace, or maybe even not at all? Or make snide comments?
Her reluctance to have sex with you could be down to many reasons. She could just be exhausted from working two jobs. As you "pretty much live with her", do you contribute to at least half the household expenses, or do you expect her to carry on paying for everything as you have not "officially" moved in? (Asking as this would explain her need to work two jobs while you lounge about, demanding sex.)
Perhaps she does not find sex enjoyable with you and sees it as just another chore on top of looking after the house (do you help at all?) and working two jobs. Do you ask her what SHE enjoys? Do you work at ensuring she enjoys the experience, or is it all about you?
Your comment about oral was rather nasty, not to mention ill informed. If this is how you interact with her in general, then it is little wonder she doesn't want sex with you. Women need to feel loved to want sex. What do you do to make HER feel loved? A lack of sex drive on the part of the woman is often a reflection of the relationship in general.
To answer your question, yes, I think you SHOULD move back home. This lady deserves to be treated with more respect and consideration.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2019): Well from what you say you expect oral sex and quite frankly no woman is obligated to give you that or to enjoy it . If she does she does if she doesn’t she doesn’t . Women are more than f... toys and what sexual acts they will or won’t perform on you. I agree with what others said in that there are no rules about what you can and can’t break up over , to be honest you comment about ‘ she sure can take good ‘ sounds very passive aggressive and you don’t wound like you think highly of her
Sounds like you definately should break up
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (21 January 2019):
 Yes, break up and let her go.
You want sex, she doesn't. Sounds like she either isn't FULFILLED sexually, bored with sex or JUST doesn't have much of a libido. After working a full time and a part-time job... maybe she is just exhausted!
You live with her but have your own house... so pack up, move out.
If sex is important to you... then find someone who feels the same way. Instead of have expectations of your current GF.
Also with the giving head... maybe she isn't a fan of it and doesn't WANT a dick down her throat. Sure.. food goes all the way down your gullet and through your intestines, doesn't mean women WANT to suck your dick.. to put it bluntly. You get what SHE is willing to give. And since that isn't enough... let her go.
...............................
A
female
reader, singinbluebird +, writes (21 January 2019):
 Sex is extremely important and it differentiates friendship from a romantic relationship. My advice is bring it up that you're needs are not being met. If she loves you she will try to meet them ( As you should try meet her needs for cuddling, affection, commitment as well). If things do not change, gently break it off. Whatever people say, we all get into relationships so our emotional, physical, and mental needs can be met. If there's no compatibility, break it off and find someone who can.
...............................
|
