A
female
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:well I like my teacher a lot and im deciding whether I should tell him or not. I'm thinking telling him is the only way I'm going to stop liking him because its going to get rid of all the what if's going on in my head and I know it might make things awkward between us but maybe its what I need because the way we act with eachother is not a healthy student-teacher relationship. (it would be considered flirting if he was my age) I'm not going to get into it but there is a lot of stuff he does that maybe if he didn't do it I wouldn't like him as much and if he knew I liked him he probably wouldn't act like that way with me. but I don't want to tell him because I just don't know how to go about it. I'm not telling hoping to date him, I want to tell him so he will understand when why I don't talk to him as much when I start avoiding him. I've liked how for almost a year and I haven't liked anyone this much before. I wouldn't do it if it wasn't my last resort but it is. please help
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female
reader, sweetuffy23  +, writes (14 April 2008):
I would suggest not telling him.I am in a bad situation because of a flirty teacher.If you tell him he most likely will show interest and that may be what you want but it'll embarass both of you.You should continue avoiding him and no matter what friends say about telling him dont get caught up.A good friend is better than a bad relationship.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (14 April 2008):
 Hate to burst your bubble but he most likely won't even notice if you distance yourself. You've a bad case of the school crush so do yourself a favor and keep your distance.
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A
female
reader, british_girl  +, writes (14 April 2008):
 I love my teacher too and i feel like telling him every day just because i want him to know that someone cares for him as much as is humanly possible, or because of the tiny tiny tiny chance that something could happen between us, or just because i hate having it inside me... but i don't tell him. And i won't. Not until i leave school, at least, because everything would change for the worse if i let him know how i feel about him right now.
Hope everything works out ok for you xx
mail me if you want
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister +, writes (13 April 2008):
 You are wanting to tell him so you can open more doors. If you weren't wanting that, you would be okay avoiding him and respecting the boundary. It's that simple. You are an adult and you are attracted to this guy, it's not wrong but considering the situation, potentially unethical and it could get him fired. If he were the one uncomfortable with the boundary and avoidance, he would be struggling with it but he's not, you are. He's okay with the situation, may flirt here and there, but you are the one that can't just let it be. At least admit that much.
I'm telling you this because you are no longer a child but you want to act like one by acting like you have no control over your feelings and pretending that telling him will have no consequences. You know that it will but like a child, you hope that you can do this and if he doesn't respond the way you want, you can pretend you only did this because "you couldn't take how you felt anymore".
Stop playing this game. From what you wrote about him, you may get a positive response if you tell him but don't act like you are not going to be responsible for the consequences either way. How will you feel if you tell him and he says "okay, I perfectly understand why you need to avoid me and I respect that" and sticks to his word and stops flirting with you and you get nothing. I don't think that's going to go over too well for you. I even think you'll be devastated. He's okay with the boundary, if he wasn't, different things would be happening and you would probably post on this site "I'm having an affair with my teacher and I don't know what to do, is this wrong?". In your situation, he hasn't even asked you why you avoid him. What does that tell you? I just don't think you are really prepared for the consequences in this. What happens it he does the right thing and informs the school so that you can't be around him at all- are you prepared for that?
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers + ♥, writes (13 April 2008):
You realise that if you tell him, you won't just be telling him.
There are so so many rules about this. He will tell the head of department, who will tell the principal. They will then pull you out for a "chat" about how it can never happen and to check he didn't abuse his position.
Then you will have to move class or he will and there is a good chance the reason will get out so everyone will know. It could affect his career if rumours get out.
The best thing for you to do is to back off. Act professionally. You are an adult and are capable of holding back your feelings.
Go to his classes, hand your assignments in, and get out of there.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, MRS BEAR +, writes (13 April 2008):
 If he acts this way with everyone i would say he is overstepping the mark and you need to realise he is just being over-friendly.But i think from what you say he is way abusing his authority - he is wrong - he is your teacher and could get into trouble for flirting with you. You cannot have a relationship with him.You should not have these worries at your age, you should only worry that you get to much homework not that your teacher is flirting with you. We all like attention it makes us feel good about ourselves.Please do not worry about upsetting him just concentrate on your studies and do well in class and keep you distance from him. He is a grown man he will understand - you don't have to say anything.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2008): Hi Hunny
This is your teacher, Even if he has certain feelings they are wrong in his profession..If you are avoiding him sweetheart because of this, It does not give good teacher student realation at all let alone how much trouble he could get into...http://heyteach.org/ht_trouble_pt2.cfm
It is not wise to tell him, To talk to someone, A school counsellor if your worried, which I doubt you will feel comfortable doing hunny but would be wise...If anyone knows of these feelings it could get out of control and word can spred and he could find himself in a great deal of trouble..So if he is flirting with you hunny ignore it and get on with your education as best as you can, I understand how hard it is but it will only cause pain and heatache for you hunny, Ive popped a link for you to read love...TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOU WITH LOVE N HUGS MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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