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Need help undestanding her?

Tagged as: Breaking up, The ex-factor, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (19 April 2011) 1 Answers - (Newest, 19 April 2011)
A male United States age 30-35, *uccimane99 writes:

Alright so i got a really random as questions. When she broke up with me it was hell because i couldn't see where i went wrong and my friends and her friends couldn't either. I found out later it was because i was Clingy. I understand and took that as a learning experience. So i wrote this letter to my ex i will add it at the end. Well when i gave it to her she smiled and she responded really mature about it saying she accepted my apology and she was sorry for her part in it too and she is happy and she hope i am too. Then she told me i was a good hearted person and not to change. So i took that as well whatever.

I started really just moving on when today i walk into class with her and she moved by me like two seat so i moved back a seat. So that i wouldn't be that close to her because i told her at the beginning i didn't want friendship it was all or nothing. So i have this really good friend and we had class with her first semester we were close but she found him cute but said she never saw him in that light. So today i was gonna comment on one of his status's cuz it was like going to cuddle with a pillow and take a nap and she wrote jealous. A couple months ago he wrote another status and she was like chris stop prononucing your love on facebook for me and he was like oh you wish. Then my really good friend whose a girl was like wow like really you two and seriously chris i thought you were josh's good friend. Chris was like it was just a joke and she liked it i had her blocked but she sent it to me then that same month she was asking my friends who i workout with how i was doing. This was after she sent me a text just to see if i would respond like i hope your doing well and i hope you know i don't have a problem with you. I really don't understand her i give her a leter and she pulls the same stunt again what is she doing? What your opinion

I hand write the letter and put it in an envelope with her name on it.

I just wanted to make things clear since I do owe you this I’m sorry for what I’ve done. In the past weeks/months I’ve been realizing how immature I was towards you when we broke up. I said some stuff I really didn't mean and they hurt you. I was just emotional messed up with all the things going on in my life. I’m sorry I took them out on you and you don’t deserve that. You are right I am emotional unstable but, I have learned through life that you should live everyday as if it were your last always tell everyone how you feel towards them this is why I follow my emotions. I do owe Kyle, your friends, and your family an apology and I’m sorry I never meant to say those things I said I was just upset. Your right it is none of my business who your friends with or who you date. It was this that made me realize i was changing from being my strong, happy, confident, independent person who wanted to make everyone happy to someone who was trying to be dependent on someone else and just wanted the things that I wanted. I’m sorry for all the unnecessary drama i have caused you and I’m sorry that we didn't work out you were right. I should tell you that it was my fault we broke up and not yours. I never thought you were a bad person I always thought you were someone who is smart, confident, and caring and that makes you who you are. I truly hope that whatever your doing you are happy. I know in my heart one day you will make an excellent special ed teacher. Im not going to bother you again with this i truly am sorry and goodbye.

View related questions: broke up, facebook, immature, jealous, my ex, text

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (19 April 2011):

CindyCares agony aunt It was a complicated story and I am not sure I got it, anyway I'd say she is not pulling any stunt on you- She is your ex , she can write what she wants.

Probably it's all friendly , flirty banter and does not mean anything at all. Or maybe, she sort of liked this Chris two months ago and she did not push things farther because she was your gf- now she is single, and tryng her luck with him.

Either way, why does this concern you ? You wrote your letter, apologized, said no hard feelings and goodbye. She read it, accepted your apologies, answered politely, all's well that ends well.

Now, if you really want to move on- live your life and stop wondering about hers.

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