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My two year old is not progressing vocally the way people tell me he should. Do I have cause to worry?

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Question - (17 August 2012) 9 Answers - (Newest, 17 August 2012)
A female United Kingdom age 41-50, anonymous writes:

My beautiful toddler has just turned 2.

He's not talking though. He makes sounds but no real proper words except grandma and mama which he uses to describe everything. He is a good communicator and lets me know what he wants non-verbally, and his understanding of me is quite good too. But the words are still not there despite the fact the children's books all say he should be able to pt two words together at this stage.

Those of you who have children or work with children ... should i be worried, is this normal? I wouldn't say he has anything wrong with him but lack of words, he is quite quick and healthy and loves doing sign lanuage. But i am worried in case he's not progressing as he should. What age did your children become talkatic??

thanks

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2012):

You don't mention child's father. Is he in the picture? If not, how long gone and why?

Answers to those questions may provide valuable information and insight to child's seeming lack of progress.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2012):

My little brother didn't speak a word until he was three years old. He is now 13 and speaks fine :)

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2012):

My son was the same, I took him to the doctor who arranged a Speech Therapist. It was, apparently just laziness, as long as he could communicate what he wanted he didnt see the NEED to talk. I was advised to not react to him until he asked properly what he wanted or needed, it worked eventually too.

He did see the therapist a few times but by the time he got to Nursery and Infant School was communicating with everyone as he should.

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A male reader, C. Grant Canada +, writes (17 August 2012):

C. Grant agony auntAs others have said, kids develop at different rates. My first two (girls) were perhaps a bit ahead of the curve. The next, my son, was quite a bit slower. We were becomming concerned at his very poor enunciation by the time he started school, and were looking in to speech therapy. But it all worked out fine -- today he's 14, well-spoken, and a fine student. We ended up doing nothing more than read to him and correct him as we did with the other two.

Yes, get his hearing checked and all that. Certainly be on the lookout for signs of a developmental disability. But don't panic, and certainly don't stress the child. Age two, particularly for boys, likely isn't a problem.

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A female reader, pinktopaz United States +, writes (17 August 2012):

It's probably best to have him evaulated. My nephew has autism and he used to get frustrated because he couldn't convey what he wanted into words. After being evaluated, someone worked with him and he talks just fine (he's just on the spectrum though, there's kids far worse than he is).

On the other hand, my best friend was a preschool teacher and I had asked her the same question in regards to my nephew. She said that some kids just would rather not speak and they do later on. It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with them or that they're "slow" they just prefer not to talk.

So like I said, have him evaluated if you're worried for some peace of mind and then I'm sure you can get some tips or help on the talking issue. As other posters have suggested, you need to tell him to "use your words" which is how they got my nephew to finally start talking after much help. His younger sister on the other hand starting talking very quickly (about 1yr or so)--so you never know, could be a progression thing or something a little more.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (17 August 2012):

Honeypie agony auntI do think every child moves in a different speed and often boys can be a little slower with the language then girls.

Read to him. When it's just the two of you name everything for him. Even when you are out point out stuff and name it. Don't expect him to want to repeat it, but trust me he will pick the words up and store them.

What you can also do is add words with the sign language. I think kids learning to sign is excellent.

Experts say that at age 2 most children have around 50 words in their vocabulary. But it doesn't mean that he can put words together just yet.

Singing is good as well. Most kids like music. So either sing children's song/hymns/ pop/rock whatnot songs for him and with him. If you don't know a whole lot I would suggest you look for a CD with children's songs and learn some :)

Encourage him to USE his words. Not just non verbally.

My youngest cousin didn't talk much at age 4 but he had a whole range of non-verbal cues. Like when he wanted a drink he would bang on the fridge (no kidding). And he got away with it. When he started Kindergarten he spoke fluently in school but still not at home. I guess because he had "trained" his family to read his cues.

I have 3 girls, they all talked early. My oldest could even spell words out loud at age 3. My middle daughter was tongue tied and had problems pronouncing words for a long time, but it never stopped her from talking. My youngest was kind of quiet because her two sisters were phenomenal at anticipating her needs so she really didn't have to speak. She did however sing constantly.

If he is otherwise doing well, is growing and is happy I wouldn't honestly worry too much. But I would start to challenge him a little.

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A male reader, hummm  United States +, writes (17 August 2012):

First have your childs hearing checked next have your child tested for autism and always encourage word communication with the child

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A female reader, ImmortalPrincess United States +, writes (17 August 2012):

ImmortalPrincess agony auntNo two children progress at the same rate. According to my mother and grandmother, when I was two, you could carry on a conversation with me. My daughter spoke her first word at eight months, but by age two she was still mixing two and three words at a time among all the baby jabber.

My grandson is twenty months old, and has quite a vocabulary. He attempts to repeat everything he hears. When he was a year old, my daughter started teaching him to say thank you, please, more, all finished, hungry, thirsty, sleepy, and I love you, via sign language. He used to just use the signs, now he uses the signs and attempts to say the words.

Children will talk when they're ready, but at age two, they're like little human tape recorders. So the more they are exposed to conversation, the easier it is for them to pick up words. I think watching educational children's programs also helps. My grandson has learned a lot of the words he speaks, from watching sprout.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2012):

I've worked in childcare for quite a few years now and the ages in which children start to develop change rapidly.

For example, I had an almost two year old in my care who barely said a word, we were all worrying that when he moved to the two years old's room he wouldn't be able to communicate or connect with the other children who were often quite loud and hectic. One day this child just started talking. When I say talking I mean proper stringing whole sentences together, naming shapes, numbers and animals that some of the three year olds would have difficulty with.

As a rule of thumb, I would expect a child to be able to say quite a few words by the age of two, but just because he's not talking yet it doesn't mean there's anything to be worried about. Is it normal? Not entirely. Does it happen to normal children? Yes.

I suggest reading lots of picture dictionary books with him and over pronouncing each word slowly whilst pointing at a picture book. Encourage him to make the sounds needed for each word. Try getting him to make all the different vowel sounds and then add consonants on the end making 'A' become 'AT' etc.

You say that he loves doing sign language, this could be another reason why he's late on talking, it may be that he's focusing on communicating with that or general babbles. Encourage him to try and ask for what he wants using words instead of gestures, for example, if he gestures that he is thirsty, make him a drink and say the word 'drink', see if he responds with noises, wait awhile before giving it to him, if he says any word that sounds similar to drink give him the drink straight away and say 'well done, drink!'. Reward him with something like a sticker every time he manages to say a new word. This may sounds like really simple, basic stuff and if you're already doing it all then ignore me, I'm being too prescriptive.

If you're still having problems in a few months or you keep worrying that he's not developing at an average rate, I would take him to a doctor or specialist, more for peace of mind than anything else.

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