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My teacher who I fancy

Tagged as: Forbidden love, Teenage, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (3 April 2009) 6 Answers - (Newest, 12 April 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 26-29, *allyy writes:

so i fancy my teacher. he is older than me by quite a margin. i am confused and dont know what to do. he found out i fancied him on a school trip abroud last year from my friends. he smiles at me in the corridors now. he also now notices me more. like before in year 7 he never liked me. now he does i think. my friends think so too.

there have been a number of incidents. firstly when i went to get a merit signed by him once (though i hadnt doen anything, my other 2 friends i was with had done the experiment) and so i went to get it signed and my other friend said 'why are you getting a merit, you didnt even do anything' and i said as a joke 'cuz i'm his favourite student ' and he heard and said 'yes, possibly.' and smiled.

then another thing happened after school.me and my friend were walkin in corridor downstairs from vending machines. he was walking towards us. he stopped me and said 'how comes your not at home.the bell went a while ago.do you not have a home to go to.' then smiled cuz it was a joke. i said as a joke 'no i'm a tramp. i live at the school. but you can take me home with you.' and he said 'yes you could come.but i'd have to charge you.' then laughed and smiled and winked. my friend was like omg. but a lot of other stuff have happened liek this.

i really need advice.

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A female reader, kitty_3 United States +, writes (12 April 2009):

kitty_3 agony auntawww! he really does seem like he likes you! if he didn't have a fmily, i'd say go for it! but since he does, maybe you two can just be friends...? next time he offers you a lift, i'd go for it!

let me know how it's going!

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A female reader, ballyy United Kingdom +, writes (7 April 2009):

ballyy is verified as being by the original poster of the question

yeah. hi its the origanal poster again.

well i am trying to get over him but its a little hard seeing as he's not trying and still talking to me lots.

i mean after school when i was standing at the top of the road with my friend we were waiting for our parents and he came out the school drive and was leaving. but he stopped the car by us. he was on the phone to someone. he pulled over by us and put the phone down.then lowered his window and said hi do you need a lift (i mean he just ignored my mate). and i was like nah i'm ok thanks. my mums coming. and he said oh ok. then like as a joke i started saying you know you shouldn't be on the phone while driving.you could get fined.

and he laughed and win ked and was like 'yes,sorry,i'l keep that in mind.'

was a bit strange.my mate was shocked.

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A female reader, justme..x United Kingdom +, writes (7 April 2009):

justme..x agony auntHi again

Oh right, so he's got a family ... well, to be honest, I can understand you feeling guilty, but I think he should feel worse: after all, he's the adult, and it's his family. From your stories about your conversations, (although I can't fairly judge him)he doesn't seem to be guilty or holding back very much.

Of course, I don't blame you for loving him; it's understandable even without the flirty conversations.

My advice is, just KEEP IT QUIET if you can't get rid of it. As it is not only on your part, it is harder to just forget it and get over it.

But seriously, be careful. No offence, and I'm sure you know this, but well, it is kind of wrong. You're either going to have to get over each other or keep it really quiet, and pray noone finds out.

It depends if you're going to feel guilty about it if you keep going ... if it's going to bother you then it would be better to move on and try and forget him. But if you think you can live with the guilt, then, well, good luck and congrats on falling in love :P

sorry i can't say anything more helpful

Good luck xx

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A female reader, ballyy United Kingdom +, writes (7 April 2009):

ballyy is verified as being by the original poster of the question

yeah sorry. its me the original poster.

he's like early 40s and he is married with kids.

thats why i feel so guilty.

like last week sometime again;

me and my friend ater school go to an ice cream van up the road then come back into school, and as we walked back into school we had to walk past the chemitry block whre he works and we'd passed and he came out behind us. he recognised me from behind and said 'Is that ....(my name)' . he'd ignored my friend and said it to me. so we both stopped and turned to see him walking behind us. and then he just suddenly started talking to me about random stuff like how i'd been great in the recent assembly we'd had on that trip abroad where he'd found out. then he started saying how my chemistry test results were very good. (though when i got them back i'd only got liek 80% or something). then i randomly said how i liked his tie cause i really did. it was cool and had the periodic table on it. and he said thanks.then now like in every lesson we have, on that day he wears that tie.

lmao.

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A female reader, justme..x United Kingdom +, writes (7 April 2009):

justme..x agony auntHi :)

Well, obviously your feelings are totally understandable, especially with all those slightly flirty conversations you've had.

It certainly sounds like he likes you back!

However, please please don't cling to this or trust that view completely. I am not in your situation, I can only judge from what you've said.

I don't think it would be a good idea to directly talk to him about your feelings ... although he plainly likes you, you can never tell how he would react until it's too late. He might be in a relationship (well you might know if he is or not; I don't think you said) and even if he isn't it's likely that he'll put keeping his job first.

I know it is hard, especially if you feel really strongly, but I would just carry on as you are. Enjoy the conversations you have, and be yourself. When you leave school ... well, you never know, and it sounds pretty likely to me! But for now, I'd just go on as you are and wait and see what the eventual outcome is.

Good luck, I hope it comes out well :) xx

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A female reader, Tevote Australia +, writes (4 April 2009):

Tevote agony auntWell sounds like there's a bit of subtle flirting going on, and not so subtle.

So i'm guessing he likes you a fair bit. But as you probably know there are a lot of consequences to what you're doing-Sure it could just be the type of people you are and you've formed a good friendship, but it could eventually turn into something else-Which in the long run isn't the best idea.

All I can say is, just act normal-if you talk you talk, if something happens it happens-You need to learn this lesson on your own, whether the outcome good or bad-I hope it's good, and I wish you luck..

I believe something is going on between you two :P

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