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My long distance boyfriend asked me to share my naked pic, I refused to share and now he is sad. Should I send him my naked pic? 

Tagged as: Long distance, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (23 September 2012) 7 Answers - (Newest, 24 September 2012)
A female India age 26-29, anonymous writes:

I'm in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend. We both are of same age, 16 years old. He is Australian and I'm Indian. We met 2 months ago on facebook and he proposed me after 1 month. I love him a lot. I strictly follow what our holy book says, no sex before marriage. I just loved one person truly in my life, my ex-boyfriend. He was Indian living in australia, we both were in long distance relationship. He was older than me and never forced me to send naked pics. Later we broke up because I found out that he is married. This 16 year old boyfriend of mine asked me to send my naked pic this night. We have never met in real life, we are planning to meet when I complete my education. He said that he wants to get engaged when we are 18, so I will tell my mom about him when I complete 18 years of age. We were chatting on facebook today and he asked me to send my naked pic to him. I told him that I'm not comfortable doing it and I will send you my naked pic when we are engaged. I don't want to do something that will hurt my mom. I don't feel comfortable sharing naked pic with him. He is sounding sad from the way he is talking after I refused him to share my naked pic. Did I hurt my boyfriend? I was shattered after my first breakup. I have low self-esteem. I have been called ugly by a guy online who proposed me but I broke up with him coz I didn't want to be with a guy who doesn't respect me and accept me for real me. Should I show my boyfriend my naked pic? He said that it is a sign of true love. I don't want to lose him but I don't want do something which I'm not comfortable doing.

View related questions: broke up, engaged, facebook, long distance, my ex, nude pictures

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A reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2012):

No! He's manipulating you, be strong and stay true to your beliefs, you will be so much better for it and have reason to be proud of yourself which will help your confidence more than sending him a naked picture ever could. Once you send him those pictures you'll never be able to get them back.

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A male reader, Xearo Trinidad and Tobago +, writes (23 September 2012):

I think you should only do these things if you are completely comfortable with it. This goes without saying that you should only do these things when you trust him as well. I think you should get to know him more before you do such things. Also there are dangers to sending pictures which can be used against you. If he really loves you then it should not matter if he does not see naked in a pic.

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (23 September 2012):

chigirl agony auntYou've only been together two months and he is asking you to get NAKED and take pictures of you and send to him so he can masturbate to them. He might also possibly be lying to you like your ex was, you need to get to know him a lot better before you can trust him completely.

NO to the naked pictures. NEVER send naked pictures or give out naked pictures. Because what if you and him broke up and he puts your picture online for others to see? What if he shows his friends to brag about how he got you to strip naked for him?

What do you think he will use these pictures for? He will use them for sex. If you do not believe in sex before marriage then how can you even think about making pornography of yourself?

This isn't about love, this is about a 16 year old boy taking advantage of your feelings for him, and wanting you to give him free porn. If he respected you he wouldn't even ask such a thing.

Naked pics are NOT a sign of true love. A man wanting you to send him naked pictures in just interested in one thing: to use you for sex. He is showing you a lack of respect by asking such a thing. Trying to twist it into being about love also shows that he is willing to take advantage of your feelings for him, making you do things you do not want to as "proof of love". It is a lie. Naked pictures are not proof of love.

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (23 September 2012):

CindyCares agony aunt People who can't learn from their mistakes are bound to repeat them.

So you found a boyfriend on line... just to find out that he was married - so he was never your boyfriend to begin with, because married guys already have ( duh ) wives,cannot have girlfriends.

But that has not inspired you to be more produent, and to take your time ( as well as proof, and infos ) before giving your heart, and your naked pic, to perfect strangers.

How do you know that this guy is single and 16 and he loves you ? For all you know he could be some 60 y.o. married wanker. Or, he could be who he says he is - a boy of 16 - and be just your typical horny teenager collecting pics to use as free porn for his masturbating sessions. How do you know that you are his only online gf ? You have never met in person, never kissed, never hugged him or touched, and you want to send him your naked pic ?... talk about the cart before the horses !

There are steps to intimacy, for some couples it takes a long time to take them all, other couples are much much faster, but.... this is stupid, this instant intimacy. It's like showing up butt naked at your first date, it does not make you " spontaneous ", but only insane !

What if he shows your pic to all his friends to brag a bit ? what if you break up and he puts yor pic on the net for all to see as a vengeance ?

True love, my foot. . True love does not demand or push for "love signs ", and surely not for a sign that makes the loved one uncomfortable.

So no, do not send him your nude pic, and actually the best you could do would be to stay away from online romances until you have developped some more maturity, self respect and common sense.

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A female reader, BondGirl72 United States +, writes (23 September 2012):

BondGirl72 agony auntYou should absolutely NOT send him naked pictures of yourself. Like one of the other posts said, you do not really know him. Besides, even if you did, I would tell you the same thing. These pictures have a way of re-surfacing and you do not want that if you ever plan to get a job, get married, or a whole list of other things. NEVER send naked photos of yourself to anyone.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (23 September 2012):

Honeypie agony auntNo, he doesn't NEED your naked pictures and honestly, you do not KNOW him well enough to share though.

WHO knows what can happen to those pictures..

Sharing naked photos is NOT and I repeat NOT a sign of TRUE love. TRUE love is to not BLACKMAIL your loved one into doing something he/she isn't comfortable with.

You need to START listening to your GUT and STOP trying to please everyone. If it FEELS wrong for you to do, then it IS wrong for you to do, regardless of what this guy tells you.

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A female reader, lmao1989 United Kingdom +, writes (23 September 2012):

lmao1989 agony auntYou need to be so careful because i've been in a similar situation.

From him saying it's a sign of true love it is not!

He's trying to con you into sending one stand your ground and don't do it!

You've never met the guy he could be a pervert or anything. I done something silly like that and i can tell you i MASSIVELY regret it because I was being played all along, he is only sad because he is trying to get you to send the picture to him so he's being sad towards you because of it.

But you really have to be so careful with this kind of thing as i've said i've been in this situation and i can tell you i was humiliated and it was the worst thing i ever done and it shattered my confidence even more!

Please message me if you want to ask any more.

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