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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I have been married for 7 years and 2mths. I love my husband, but as of lately, the size of his penis bothers me. In fact, for quite sometime I wished he had a larger penis. He has been the only man I have ever had sex with, he makes me orgasm several time during sex, but his penis is so short. Sometimes he tries so hard to please me sexually, but I literally feel nothing pleasurable. I love to touch his penis randomly, which he likes, but at times, it is all shriveled up that when I go to touch him, it feels like a stub, and makes me feel so turned off. I watch porn, and the size of the men compared to my husband, it's like so dissatisfactory. He rarely foreplays, but wants me to give him oral when he's soft. The last sexual encounter was, I gave him oral on his short penis while soft but he just wanted to penetrate when he got hard. I found it to be unfair but he just went and sleep leaving me so disgusted by this ordeal. How do I get over my husband's small penis)?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 February 2021): Talk to him about it. Find the perfect sex toy size that you want and have him use it on you.
Tell him to look up penis enlargement. From all accounts it works but takes time.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2021): Here's the way I see it. You're in love with porn starts huge penises. Those big dongs are beautiful.. But so is Bradly Cooper. Your husband makes you cum. He's your only partner, you have no yardstick. I had eight checks on my yard stick, one was porn star sized...ehh. He'd be on my 2nd team.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2021): I knew a man who by all accounts had a massive penis but his girlfriend dumped him because he had no idea how to use it and by her description was useless in bed. You say he has a small penis but since he is your only sexual partner you have nothing to compare him to in reality. The fact he can make you have several orgasms doesn't scream out to me (pardon the pun) that he is selfish and there are different ways and moods when it comes to sex, if I know my partner is just wanting sex without the thought into pleasing me from time to time that's just fine, I like to see him enjoying himself whatever our moods.
I think you are very fixated on porn and that simply isn't reality. Switch off and look up ways to be closer and to really connect with HIM and not his penis
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  + ♥, writes (6 February 2021):
 Sorry but your post makes no sense whatsoever. In one breath you state "he makes me orgasm several time during sex" and "Sometimes he tries so hard to please me sexually", yet you go on to state "I literally feel nothing pleasurable" and "He rarely foreplays".
Comparing yourself/others to what you see in porn is always going to end badly. Porn is fantasy. It is not real. Do you think these obscenely well-endowed men are like that 24/7? When they are not "working", they are exactly the same as most other men. They don't look like that when not aroused. Also remember, most of them have "staff" to arouse them and make them hard enough to "perform", and many are probably also on drugs to help keep them hard. You are comparing a fantasy industry with real life. There is no comparison.
Your husband cannot change the size of his penis, just as you cannot change how YOU look.
If he occasionally expects "selfish" sex, then surely this is not a problem if other times he works at satisfying you? I'm sure you don't complain about the latter. Perhaps the times he is giving it his all to give you your multiple orgasms, he is not as sexually gratified himself? Sometimes it's a good thing to have completely selfish sex, where you focus only on yourself, as long as this is not the norm.
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A
male
reader, liddel  +, writes (5 February 2021):
You’ve been married 7 years. Unless you’re willing to end it or are willing for things to stay the same, things need to change. If you watch porn together, ask him to recreate the foreplay in the video. You might start with some that have finger manipulation and work your way up to oral. If you get there and you are satisfied, that should be an easy compromise. Tell him you want him to pleasure you in these ways every time you have sex. Make sure he knows how much you enjoy these acts by being very vocal while they are happening. As to wanting to be more filled, there are tools to do that. There are thousands of different models of adult toys that will fill you as much as you would like. You can purchase that type of toy and use it secretly or using the same way of getting him into other foreplay, ask him to purchase them and use them on you. At the same time, you need to volunteer to also try new things to do to make him feel good too. What’s good for the goose is .....Take it slowly and be reassuring that you love him and enjoy your love live together. He might be shocked to try a toy larger than himself but it may well not bother him at all. If he does in fact have a small penis, he has been aware of that a lot longer than you have. Ideally, the priority for everyone is to please their partners. If you both adopt that attitude, the next few decades of your life will be much more physically and emotionally richer than it would otherwise be.
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A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (5 February 2021):
 You say you feel nothing pleasurable, then say he make you orgasm several times during sex. I'm sorry, but is having an orgasm 4 times during sex not pleasurable?.
That's probably more time's that a woman climaxes during sex with someone with a larger penis, so he must be doing something right.
If your comparing him to Male porn stars then of course he is going to appear small. Porn is not reality, and keep watching this stuff can have an effect on relationships.
I think your reading to much into this, he does not sound like a selfish lover either. Its rather shallow to be honest. Its like him writing a post on here saying I just can't get hard because I hate my wife's breasts.
Also, you been married to him for seven years,i assume you knew what his manhood was like when you walked down tied the knot.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2021): Am I missing something here? Did your husband's penis suddenly SHRINK over the course of your 7 year 2 month marriage (and prior courtship)??? Why has the size of his penis become a problem for you LATELY? What has changed recently to make you think this way? Is it because you have started to watch PORN? Well if that is it, I suggest you stop watching porn. It is all fake and has nothing to do with real life, real people or real marriages. Be lucky you have a man who loves you and does not cheat on you because you are NOT PERFECT either. Porn is poison. Nobody can measure up to that. Not even porn actors themselves. They are FAKING IT. That is why. You knew your husband's penis was that size when you married him. You still said I DO. It is very judgmental, self centered and insensitive of you to shame him for a body part which belongs to him, and one which he cannot change. And more so, one which you accepted when you accepted his proposal of marriage. Now you are having a problem with it?Has his performance dropped somehow? Maybe your performance has? There is obviously some discord in your relationship for this to even become an issue. Are you fighting? Are you bored? Are you upset with your husband about other issues you have not told us about, or even mentioned to him? But rather you have chose to let the issues fester and affect your sex life? It seems to me there is a deeper issue here. What is it? Confront it. And maybe be open with your husband on how to fix it. It just seems to me like you do not like your husband very much. And are nit picking at his penis size.BTW, it is not the size that counts, it's how you use it. And also, size does count. The size of a man's HEART. Ever thought about that? If you want a better partner in bed, become a better partner YOURSELF. Do not pin all the blame on him. Good sex takes two people. It is a team effort. Are you doing your part?And if all else fails and all you want is a bigger cock, go find one but leave your husband alone. He will find a woman who loves his cock and loves what a catch he is because he is a NICE GUY and NICE GUY'S are hard to find in this world when all is said and done.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (4 February 2021):
 How do you get over it?
By getting over yourself.
There is NOTHING he can do about the size of his penis. So you being MAD or UPSET that it isn't bigger is unfair. What if he was upset about your vagina? It's too big? How would you feel? You would blame it on HIS penis size and be mad and upset at him for thinking this. Again, UNFAIR.
You, like so many people who indulges in porn, don't seem to grasp that 1. porn is FAKE, it's Make-believe IT IS SCRIPTED! All the moans, the orgasms and ejaculations.
2. they hire MEN with (generally) bigger dicks - not because a bigger dick is better - but visually it is what MEN (generally) wants to see - size means ability to dominate, please etc. That is why men in porn can be ugly AF as long as the slong is big. Think, Ron Jeremy. And the women are (generally) hired on the basis on how willing she is to do whatever is asked, for money and hopes of fame.
3. 80 % of women do no orgasm from penetration alone. 80%
4. it's not because of HIS performance you complain " he makes me orgasm several time during sex," SEVERAL times, I's say you are lucky as is.
5. The vagina is really only so deep naturally. While it can expand (for birth and when aroused - no one really NEEDS a big penis to climax.
Lastly, if you give him oral and HOPE to be pleased in return then make sure you TELL him that it's unfair of him to just climax and go to sleep. He isn't a mind-reader but if you have TOLD him about his minimal penis, I can kind of see why he is now "shafting" you sexually.
If you think a big dick will make your life better, maybe divorce your husband and find a man with a big dick - this man might (or might not) lack in other qualities but hey who cares?! his dick is big!
Read what you read in your own post. And if you don't find it a ridiculous problem, then maybe you need to grow up a little and read it again.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2021): Stop watching porn and that real feeling of sexiness comes from within.
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