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My girlfriend wears the pants! How do I get the pants back?

Tagged as: Dating, Sex, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (27 February 2007) 1 Answers - (Newest, 27 February 2007)
A male Australia age 30-35, *att86 writes:

My girlfriend wears the pants. How do I get my pants back?!?

I feel this problem stems from her making alot more money than I do. It isn't really possible for me to make more money because I am at uni full-time and she isn't, so I don't have the time to work to catch up to her financially. She definitely sees herself as the dominant one in the relationship and I really need to fix this. Is there a certain way I could act or treat her to make her think that I'm calling the shots? Hell I'd even be happy if she felt that we have equal say over everything. I have to work really hard to earn her recognition and affection. It's always up to her when we have sex. If I try to jump her or somehow insinuate that "I'm going to have sex with you, weather you want it or not" she gets really pissy and ignores me. I don't mean that in a creepy date-rape sense, thats just me trying to assert some dominance. She decides what we eat, where we go, what we do, what bills I pay, what housework she wants me to have done by the end of the day etc...

I want to be the one calling the shots! I've always been the one calling the shots in every other relationship I've had, so it's really weird and frustrating to be going through this.

View related questions: money

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A female reader, nicola79 United Kingdom +, writes (27 February 2007):

nicola79 agony auntIts quite simple,tell her how she is making you feel, no one needs to be the dominant one here,like you said it would work out fine if it was 50 50 so just tell her how you feel.

She just needs to be brought down a peg or two, just because she is bringing home more money doesnt give her the right to boss you. About the sex thing, next time she says she feels like it,just tell her that you dont and see how she likes it. If she says for you to do the cleaning then tell her that you know and it will get done when you are ready to do it. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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