A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have a male friend who i feel extremely close to, i can talk to him about anything. The other day we were having a normal conversation on MSN and i asked what gossip he had to tell me in conversation. He messed about and said things like 'haha its a secret' so it made me beg him to tell me.He eventually replied.. i love you, me being unsure if he was just joking or casual flirting i laughed it off saying how shocked i'd be if it was real. He then became serious and replied 'How do you no it wasn't real?' i didn't say alot because i was still shocked but basically asked him straight out if he meant it.He then started saying well sometimes i think i do actually love you, he later replied with ' i have alot on my mind, im kinda in the do i? don't i? phase. I started to get annoyed as the first thing that came into my head was 1. why bring it up if you wasn't sure. and 2. you obviously dont like me that much or you'd know, you kinda either do or you dont.He wouldn't explain it further than that all he said was 'i dont know, im not sure, i wouldnt like to say anything yet'. Why would he come out with something as strong as 'i love you?To me that is alot different to saying 'i like you' and i know hes not one to throw those kind of words around, he doesnt even like putting kisses 'xx' at the end of messages whereas ALL my other male friends do. So its not like he says i love you alot friends or more, i've never even heard him say it to his past girlfriends, because he doesnt believe in saying it unless he means it.But he was unsure if he even liked me or not, let alone love. Thats why hes confused me so much when he said one thing, and then changed it and said another.I began to think if he said it afterwards because he was unsure how i was going to react, if i was gonna tell him i liked him back? or if i was going to friendzone him.Can anyone shine some light onto this situation, he said he'd let me know when hes figured it out; but it seems to me as if hes regretted saying anything, is it because he generally has changed his mind about me and doesnt actually want to have a relationship with me, is it because hes worried about how i'll react? surely he'd know if he liked me or not (especially love).Please help, thanks in advance x
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female
reader, fishdish  +, writes (23 November 2009):
 well..i mean he at least has a crush on you it seems. why don't you two date a little, see if you like each others' families, friends, habits, etc. and maybe it WILL blossom into more?
A
female
reader, MKrista +, writes (23 November 2009):
 He sounds scared to me. I can't count how many times I have seen guys (and girls) paste on the "I'm not actually sure, so just forget about it" thing so they wouldn't have to face their true feelings and, more terrifyingly, face the consequences of their feelings. I am sure that it scared him when you didn't believe straight off when he said he loved you. I think your best bet is to be tender and gentle and see if you can convince it to talk about it when he feels safe and you think he will open up completely. Then you can find out for certain how he really feels and who knows what will come from it?
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