A
female
age
36-40,
*unflower 42
writes:been with bf for 3 yrs but i think he has cheated for the fact that when we first got together we were at a party but he was in toilet supposidly being sick but i couldnt hear him then two weeks later found out my ex best mate was in toilet with him he says nothing happened not sure i belive him as he didnt tell me straight away
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female
reader, sunflower 42 +, writes (22 May 2007):
sunflower 42 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks stina thankyou for all your help and i will keep you posted i hope i can sort it
A
female
reader, stina  +, writes (22 May 2007):
 I think it's time that you and he had a heart to heart conversation. Tell him that he's hurting your feelings and making you upset. But keep in mind not to sound like your attacking him - just be straight up with him. Also tell him that you'd like to know if he's saying these things because of anything that you are doing. (I'm not saying that it's right of him to act this way if he is reacting this way to anything you've done/said, okay?) Make sure that he knows you are talking to him so that things can be fixed.
If he keeps acting like this - telling you that women want him, etc - then you could go a few ways the way I see it:
1. Tell him to shove it (not recommended! lol)
2. Tell him something like "I know, sweetie! And I'm so glad I get to have you all to myself." But I wouldn't make it sound like you "worship" him or anything, just say it sweetly and with a tone that says "okay, enough."
3. Ask him why he keeps telling you about other women wanting him. (If I were you, I would honestly want to know what the deal was.)
Hope this helps you more!
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A
female
reader, sunflower 42 +, writes (22 May 2007):
sunflower 42 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell he winds me up saying that he has women wanting him and he went out with mates and had women kissing a rose on his top also when i was pregnant we split for a night and he told me he did something but then said it was a joke to see if i had done something so sometimes i dont know whats true and whats not
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A
female
reader, sunflower 42 +, writes (22 May 2007):
sunflower 42 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhe also winds me up about how he has women wanting him and when he went out with his mates he had women kissing the rose on his top but its not just that we went away and he come out the loo with an smirk on his face followed by some girl and told me she had grabbed him between the legs but then would not let me say anything. we also split for anight when i was pregnant and the next day he said he had done something but then said he only said it to see if i had done anythingmyslf
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A
female
reader, sunflower 42 +, writes (22 May 2007):
sunflower 42 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionits always been at the back of my mind and i have tried to forget about it but sometimes even he brings it up by saying that he cant belive that i think he would do that it always seems to come up especially as we have been arguing alot i dont want to lose this relationship so if you have any advice i would be really grateful
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A
female
reader, stina +, writes (22 May 2007):
Hello Sunflower,
The time to bring this up was three years ago when it happened. Is there a reason you're thinking about it now? Is there a reason that you don't think you can trust your boyfriend at this point in time? Surely you couldn't have just thought about this out of the blue...there has to be a reason that it's on your mind. Can you maybe give some more details?
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A
female
reader, deejuliet +, writes (22 May 2007):
 Wait a second. You have been with him 3 years and think that 3 years ago he may have cheated on you and NOW you are worried about it?!?! If you thought this then why have you been with him for the past 3 years AFTER the supposed cheating MAY have taken place. Let it go!
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