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My due date is soon. I'm really scared. So how can I get this fear under control?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Health, Pregnancy, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (27 October 2012) 4 Answers - (Newest, 28 October 2012)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

When my mum had my youngest sister 6 years ago she had really bad complications in pregnancy (eclampsia)

She ended up really sick and to be honest it frightend me to bits as being 18 at the time, the memory is very fresh.

I'm now expecting my first baby and my husband and I are both really looking forward to becoming parents. However im too afraid to admit how frightend I am that something is going to go wrong, not just for my sake but for my child as well.

Im a healthy person and havent yet had problems, but so was my mother, apart from being over 40 which is always higher risk.

My mothef had such a traumatic end to her pregnancy and a terrible birth experience ending in caesarian section, I just cant get it out of my head! My due date is getting closer now and im really scared, how can I get this under control?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2012):

Hi, I'm first hitting forty and I had my second daughter just last year.

I had severe pre-eclampsia and genestational diabetes with my 1st and 2nd daughter .. In my first pregnancy the symptoms were not that bad though my bp and protein in my urine told a different story. Yet I felt good..

My second pregnancy I was I'll throughout but managed .. The delivery themselves went fine, yes I had a doctor on hand during delivery and there was a risk, something could happen..

But truth is there a risk everyday, when we cross the road we take a risk, when we get into a car, birthing is another risk ..

And I think you just need to steady yourself, take a deep breath and say things are going to be fine.. There no point in fretting wont help you or the baby..

So rest as much as you can , get a good book something that will make you chuckle, nice cuppa and some soft music playing in the background and you and bump just chill ..

I can understand, your a fretted like me, but honestly things will go fine..

Deep breath remember relax and take care..

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A female reader, oldbag United Kingdom +, writes (28 October 2012):

oldbag agony auntHi

You and every other woman who has had children,including myself, worried.

Its a major step bringing a life into the world emotions and hormones everywhere. Nobody has exactly the same birth so don't compare or worry about yours being like mums.

Talk to your Midwife about your fears she has probably heard similar from every first time mum to be all her career and would be surprised if you weren't nervous.

Talk to other mums who are about to give birth too.Hopefully you have been to relaxation classes so will be able to meet them there.When your holding the new bundle in your arms for the first time you will forget you were ever scared and be in love!

Good luck and congratulations x

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A female reader, Dear Mandy United Kingdom +, writes (27 October 2012):

Dear Mandy agony auntHI

Firstly I would like to say no pregnancy's are the same. I have 3 children and each one was different. All new mothers are scared of their first born, as you don't know what to expect, only by hearsay or videos or info from your Dr. I really feel for you and you have nothing to worry about honest, when that baby is in your arms you will have forgotten all else :) however I agree with Abella Speak with your Dr about any concerns, so he/she will be able to reasure you and help keep you as relaxed and as calm as possible, because if your stressed and worried your unborn baby will pick up on this via your feelings. Meditation would be great for you and Yoga for pregnant women. Congratulations and Good luck with your soon to be baby :)

Mandy x

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A female reader, Abella United States +, writes (27 October 2012):

Abella agony auntSit down for Long Appointment with your Doctor for a thorough going over of all the issues likely to affect your pregnancy. And if you are still anxious after the Doctor has spoken then organise some counselling sessions to help you deal with your fears

If you feel up to it you could also consider attending a Yoga class, preferably one for pregnant women.

It is very important that you remain calm for the sake of your baby. Delivery of a baby is always much easier when the mother has a calm disposition.

if you are attending classes prior to the birth - breathing exercises and pelvic floor exercises and relaxation etc then I think these classes will also help you to relax. You are so much younger than your mother was and so you are likely to sail through the birth without any complications.

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