A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:Ive been seeing this guy recently for a couple of weeks and I really like him and he really likes me too. The only thing I have so far seen that may stop this working out in the long run is that he works so much! He works 50, nearly 60 hours a week! On a 'good' week he will work 45 hours. And his boss doesnt make him work this many hours, he chooses to because he gets paid double time and a half for all this extra over time! With my last bf, he worked lots too. And I couldnt cope with this because I wasnt able to see my bf that much. And once again, he wasnt being made to work so much, he chose to, he chose to work so many hours that I would be LUCKY to see him once a week. And even then he would be sooo tired and cranky because he was overworking himself.I dont want to repeat tht same situation. My last bf was very materalistic, to the point that he worked so much so he could earn enough to have the materalistic life that he wanted. I myself am nothing like that. I would rather spend more time with the poeple I love then be making money to spend on materalistic things. To my ex bf, it was all about the money. It not as if he even had a meaningful job either that he loved. Perhaps then I would of been a bit more understanding.So I guess in a way im afraid that this new guy im seeing may be a bit money obsessed and materalistic like my ex. If he is then I dont think we will match.I dont feel like I can say anything to him about him wokring so much just yet because we havent been seeing each other for that long. What should i do? Give him a bit more of a go? Or end this while no ones hearts are out on the line? Do relationships ever work if one of the partners work to the exstreme?
View related questions:
money, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionManya - dr phil was agreeing with the women that the guy should work heaps? thats weird! i cant understand why he would. because family time is really important.
thanks for the advice though, i will take you up on what you said :)
A
female
reader, Manya  +, writes (19 September 2007):
Hi! I think this was the standard reason, at least when I was growing up, why doctors had so much difficulty in their marriages -- the long hours!
I saw a thing on Dr. Phil where it was the oppostite situation, where the woman was very materialistic and wanting them to
focus on earning money and buying new drapes, etc., but the guy would rather have spent less and had the time. Dr. Phil seemed to be taking the woman's side and I despised that. I think that overworking can lead to poor health, which is expensive in the long run, and that couples and families should spend time together being loving and having a LIFE!!!! There is so much beauty & love is precious!
so I agree with you.
I think you need to get to know this guy better. Perhaps he is only a temporary workaholic because he has debts or
responsibility to a sick mother. I would give him a chance,
try to find out if he really is just like your ex-boyfriend. I agree with Tellulah that you should mention how your last relationship faltered because you weren't able to see the guy enough.
Hope that this guy sees the light!
...............................
A
female
reader, TELLULAH  +, writes (18 September 2007):
 Hi,
I would talk to him about it now before its to late. Dont sound to clingy, but let him now what happened in your past relationship, and how you were efected by this. Its better to be honest, and then you know where you both stand. Maybe thats what he is used to so he wont realise that it upsets you.
Good luck
XX
...............................
|
