A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I met this girl at work, we got on like house on fire...After knowing her for 2 weeks i took her out and it went well,really well. The following week my cousins were going out so i invited her to come with us and she brought a freind along. Again we all had a great time. I went back to her place, we kissed, hugged and all was fine. She then recieved a phone call from a guy who works with us, she had told me that he comes round but it is pourly friendship and no more. He apparently had been waiting outside for her when we returned at 330am. She said she'll go and see him quickly and come back and that she feels bad cuz he's been waiting. I agreed that she should and it didnt bother me at the time, i then fel alseep on her bed, woke up and shes not back. 1 hour she hadn't returned i then became kinda angry and text "Hey u im off,i'm not the type to type to be waiting around"..As i was leaving she came in and i was drunk and couldnt even look her in the eye and left. She said call me next day and i didnt respond and walked off. Walking down i then text her "Liste i dont like be played around hope ur happy"..It wasnt untill the next day when i sobered up i realised what i'd done and regreted it. I text her "Hey i'm sorry for what happened i was drunk and i made a bad decision. Hope i'm not in the bad books. She still hasn't got back to me and it's been 3days. Unfortunalty i'm not back to work for another week to see her face to face, i'm hopeing she'l give me another chance..I'm not sure what to do next..
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female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (19 August 2008):
 I would be the same in wondering what had happened for her to not be in touch, but i also would do what your instincts are telling you to, not do anything about it til you go back to work. What a shame your off til next week! But seriously, i would hang on in there til then, its probably all thats occupying your mind at the moment i'm sure, but before you know it, it will be the weekend, then next week. She really needs to think about what she did that night, and maybe grow up a bit. It doesn't matter how long someone keeps you chatting, if she doesn't like to be rude and say she's gotta go, why did she act rude towards you and not him?
I'm speaking from experience a little bit because i dated someone a while ago, and when we first started seeing each other, we went to a club together and i came out the ladies and bumped into an ex, he kept me chatting for a while and i kept moving away to go back to where the guy i was with was, but my ex kept talking about something else. I didn't want to be rude and say look ive gotta go, but at the end of the day it was rude to the guy i was with and i didn't even see that at the time ive got to admit. He nearly walked out the club, but decided he couldn't leave me to get home on my own so waited, and it wasn't as long as you had to wait. but now i look back that was damn rude of me, and i wouldn't dream of treating someone like that again.
You weren't out of order in my opinion, and i think she was, but see what she says when you go back to work.
Its not game playing, its having some pride and seeing if she realises what she did was pretty out of order. You're adults not children at the end of the day.
Good luck.
C xxxxx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 August 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHey guys, Thanks for the advice, my instincts were that making me wait was damn rude but like one of you guys said this is only my side of the story...Before she left she said she'll be back, it all seemed right, even body language us getting close i sensed no hesitation unless in my drunken state i didnt notice. For now i'm going to leave it be until i get back to work and find out her side of the story. I'll be honest at this stage i'm trying not to call her and so far i've not. Should i call or wait until i get back to work speak to her face to face? Only thing with me is not knowing what happened and why?
I actualy know the guy she went to meet he works in same place as me, about 6 days ago she called me early morning and we spoke for awhile, laughing and joking and she also told me that he had come round last night so jokingly i replied "Wow looks like i have compition" she replied never that he's just a mate and he's no compition.
Issue also is that night i wasn't meant to stay at her place, i was going out with my cousins and her freinds. But then on the way back she said stay the night over and she'll drop me of in the morning. I was willing to get a taxi and go home but she insisted so i stayed. When her phone rang she had forgotten about him, and said to me "oooppps he was going to meet me after the club" i was like ooookkkk and gave her that look as in whats happening here but she reassured nothing just a friend and thats she's friendly like that. She asked me to wait gave me a kiss and left. It just doesn't make any sense unless i hear her side. Part of me is saying the guy kept her talking and i've known him to bring up sob stories just to keep chatting.
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A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (19 August 2008):
Something doesn't sound right here. I think even though you were drunk, you knew it was rude in the least to leave you in her room for an hour while she goes and 'chats' to some other guy from work. And you did the right thing leaving in my opinion. But i guess we only hear one side of the story, and there could be more to it. But it sounds to me like you're an upfront guy and this woman is a bit of a messer?
As i said, its hard to say though. It makes you wonder if you have had a lucky escape maybe?
C xxxx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 August 2008): Dear My Friend,
In my opinion,you should give up this girl.She won't give you another chance.It doesn't matter.You are young,strong and healthy. In a short time you will find a girl who will be interested in you much more than this girl.I believe this.You should trust yourself and think positively.Also i don't understand why she left you at her home.Were you together?There should be no secret between you.Instead of this situation,she could invite her friend into her home or you could go out together.It isn't a good idea to leave you home alone.Sorry i want to say good things but these are truths.Take care of yourself and stay lovely.
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (19 August 2008):
 Hi,
I dont think you have too much to be apologetic for mate.
She was pretty rude herself by sodding off for an hour . Askoldersister is right, he was around there at 3am for a bit of nookie.. nothing else. And maybe her after spending one hour with him he got it.
I would avoid this one my friend.
Count yourself lucky.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 August 2008): Dear Anonymous;
She has a really interesting character because she hung out with you and that night called another man to her .This is a really interesting situation and the most interesting thing is she went to that guy.C'mon who is he?If he was just a friend so why did she go near him?It is strange.Any girl doesnt go to another guy in night normally.That girl, I'm sorry for you, but she didn't like you obviously.I guess this was a very bad lie.Actually she went to best friend or the other guy was her boy friend.Because it isn't a normal situation.So you must give up.Because she doesn't care about you.You can find better girl.Dont give up searching for love.You will find it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 August 2008): wait a minute, she made you wait, but you're sorry? is that correct? she;s at fault then. tell me if I got this right.
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