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Lost my virginity and I just wanna cry...

Tagged as: Big Questions, Teenage, Virginity<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (20 February 2010) 11 Answers - (Newest, 15 April 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

im 16 and i lost my virginity few days ago, i knew the guy who i done it with wasnt my boyfriend, but since he hasnt spoke to me, i know i was just a bootycall or whatever but now i feel like crapp, i jus wanna cry, i just dunnooooooo :(

View related questions: booty call, lost my virginity

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A male reader, bruce lee Nigeria +, writes (15 April 2010):

bruce lee agony aunt I'm not sure what prompts you to ask complete strangers a question like this. Maybe you should speak about it to someone you know. Enjoy the day though.

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A female reader, kitty.letterbox Australia +, writes (22 February 2010):

hey hun, I know you feel bad about it now but one day you will look back and realise that you didn't really lose anything. so you had sex with one asshole guy, it happens to girls all the time! imagine how much worse it would be if he pretended to be interested, and then you dated him for months before realising he was an asshole, better you find out now.

I know it seems like such a thing because it was your first time, but people put SO much emphasis on losing your virginity and it's such a dated, old fashioned concept. besides, everyone's first time sucks, by DEFINITION.

so smile and realise u're lucky to be single and will find a lovely guy one day who treats you properly,

good luck :)

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 February 2010):

This is a common situation - you are not alone. I lost my virginity to a one night stand and i felt so stupid and i cried so much and i regreted it dearly but do you know what - this is one experience in your life, you messed up but that does not mean you will again and it doesn't mean everything is ruined or even that you are ruined. You messed up, you can't change it so try to learn from it - use it as a life lesson that sadly too many of us have had to learn the hard way. And the crap feeling does eventually go as you learn to forgive yourself and let go of the situation because what's done is done thus you have to find a way to move forward from this because the past cannot be changed. Give yourself time to heal emotionally. Learn from this - you too are worth more than being someone's one night stand or bootycall - this is a hard lesson learnt but perhaps you'll now know the value of you and won't give yourself away so freely next time. You are still you, no less, no more - don't forget that!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2010):

I've felt regret for sleeping with one or two people, and I've done things with people that ate me up for weeks or longer, but eventually you will get over it. I know it seems hard to believe, but one day you will wake up and realize that thinking of it sparks no feeling in your gut anymore, that it just doesn't bother you. Until then, do things you enjoy, work on yourself, and surround yourself with people who make you happy. Good luck.

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A female reader, Laura1318 Malaysia +, writes (21 February 2010):

Laura1318 agony auntYou are young and you made a mistake. Everybody makes mistakes ,learn from it and let it go.

You cannot gain or change anything by regretting it. The past is the past .

Be wiser next time.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2010):

Don't think about wanting to change what you did on the day that you had sex with him. You need to re-examine what you did to put yourself into a position to be taken advatange of like this in the first place.

You seem aware that you're just a booty call to him, so why did you ever get yourself to the point of having to choose whether or not to say no? You shouldn't have given this player a chance when you knew he just wanted sex. This is how to avoid this in the future.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

it wernt rape, well he kinda forced me into it because he is a very intimidating guy, but i could of said no if i wanted, so it wasnt rape, i was just stupidddddd

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2010):

Look I went through something like that.. And I know the feeling. You just need to hold your head up and move on. I know it's easy for people to say but you will realise that it is just something that happens.. Just because the boy isn't your boyfriend it doesn't mean you won't find one in the future someone that will love you and wouldn't have used you for sex ...

Good luck with it pet and don't forget to hold your head high and move on because it's the best thing to do xo

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A female reader, mystiquek United States + , writes (21 February 2010):

mystiquek agony auntSadly, there isn't anything you or any of us can do. All you can do is accept what happened, and move on. I'm sorry for the pain that you feel. I hope that you used protection so that you don't need to worry about other things besides the loss of your virginity. Trust me, you arent the only person in the world who has had sex and then regretted it. Just try and chalk it up as experience, and in the future make wiser decisions so that you won't look back with regret. Give yourself a big hug ok? And if the guy hasn't called you or talked to you, then forget him. He's a jerk and you deserve better.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2010):

Hun you apparently did it without consent. This is RAPE. This person must be reported to the police.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2010):

Don't feel so bad Honey, one time is like no time at all. Yes you lost your Virginity, but since you can't do nothing to reverse that, keep going on with your life and next time you want to give your cherry up again think of how you did it on the first time.

Someday a good guy will love you and do it to you in the way you'll enjoy and without having any remorse.

Good Luck and smile :)

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