A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:im close friends with a guy and up til 3 months ago he went a bit weird on me then i discovered hes 'dating' a girl.he told me shes a medical student and lives in london. the other day i fixed his cv and he asked me to go in his email. i was shocked as there was an email from this girl. turns out shes a filipino girl without a job, i think theyve met and already after 7 weeks hes sending her money. hes paid for her food, and money to fly her over here. im so angry as ive helped him loads with money, work everything and he lies to me ! i warned him that she might be playing him and he also said he didnt love her yet hes besotted with her in the emails and hes brushed me away even though ive been there for him always. we had a huge row the other day as he denied lying. im so hurt i dont know if shes genuine but the way shes asking for money so soon. he has 4 kids to support-is taking out payday loan to get her here and ive been a genuine loyal friend and hes binned me what advice can i get pls !
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female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (17 June 2011):
 If he wants to send money to her, that is his choice, you have no rights to be annoyed about this. You are not his girlfriend or wife, you said yourself you are just friends - so he can do what he wants.
If I were you, I would stop giving him money and stop helping him out so much - it sounds like he is taking advantage of your generosity and chances are your money is going towards this woman.
It sounds like you have feelings for him, but you are just friends for whatever reason, and now he likes someone else you are jealous. Sorry to say this but it doesnt sound like you have much of a chance with him, if he was romantically interested in you he would have done something about it by now. So best thing you can do is to back off a bit, stop helping him out and try and get over him so you can move on with your life.
I hope this helps and good luck!
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (17 June 2011):
 As the other Aunts have said, step back and STOP giving him money. Protect yourself and let him handle his business on his own.
Btw, I remember along the year we got several posts from a lady your age,in your country and in your situation. She had been helping a coworker , both emotionally and financially, only to be brushed off and sort of could shouldered once he had got the position he aspired to .
If that lady is you- you MUST have seen this coming and you should have stopped helping him in any way a while ago. Fool me once blame on you, fool me twice blame on me.
If you are a different lady, the advice still holds : don't get financially involved in other people's follies, not even good friends ' ( but... good friends are loyal and they tell you the truth, don't they ? )
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (17 June 2011):
 http://www.dearcupid.org/question/my-friend-is-sending-money-overseas-to-a.html
This is the link to the last question you posted about this situation. Have linked you just incase you couldn't find it.
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