A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I was wondering if it was okay for a 19 year old girl to date a 15 year old boy. I'm really worried for a friend of mine. He's obviously underage and still a minor and I'm sure there are legal implications of this but she seems so happy with him. I don't want to hurt her. Should I intervene? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (21 November 2011):
 legally no it's NOT ok
she can go to jail if she has sex with him
she can RUIN her life forever....
IF she feels THAT strongly about this young man she needs to wait till he is 18 then she can have a relationship with him.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for your answers. I'm going to have a chat with her and tell her all the things you've told me. I can't control her but hopefully I'll make her see some sense.
Thank you again :)
...............................
A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (20 November 2011):
 Yes, there are legal implications. Sex laws in the UK changed in 2003 I think. Here's the current situation. She's over 18, so is legally an adult. He is 15, and is still classed as a child, under his parents control. The legal age of consent is 16, it is illegal for them to have sex. We don't have special rules for teens - 16 is legal, under is not. If she has sex with him before he is 16, she is at risk of being arrested as a sex offender. She faces up to 3 years in jail and could be place on the sex offenders register, which is for life.If she has sex with him before he is 17, she could still be classed as a sex offender, and charged with the offence of grooming. She knew him before the age of 16 and therefore the law states that they must wait until he's 17 for sex. The offence of grooming carries a jail sentence of 3 years and her name will be entered in the sex offenders register.There is confusion in the law about whether it is legal to kiss, caress or do other sexual acts, without penetrative sex. The Sex Offences act 2003 was drafted very badly, and many teenagers and children's groups have complained about it. The act seemed to suggest that even two 15 year olds hugging could be in danger from the law.It is illegal to show a child under the age of 18 pornography. It is also illegal to take pictures of a child under 18 naked. These come under the offence of producing indecent photo's. That's the legal position. The defence is, MARRIAGE. At 16, you are able to get married with your parents permission. Sure sounds scary, BUT, THE LAW AND THE POLICE AREN'T STUPID AND WILL USE THEIR COMMON SENSE. Very few teenagers are charged or arrested by the police if they are having sex with other teenagers, especially if the gap between the teenagers is small. It's very, very unlikely that your friend will have any problems. But, I tell you the situation in law, to warn you, that if the parents get upset, they always have a right to report her and ask the police to arrest her. The school or neighbours or people with nothing to do, can also report her to the police and ask for an investigation. Social services can also interfer, and have the right to label him "out of control and in danger" and can make him a ward of court. Teenagers have gone on the Sex Offenders register for having sex with other teens. He is still young, she is older, she must be very careful with him. That is why the law makes no allowance for the fact that she's a teen too. They take the view that children under 16 should be protect from any older predator.
...............................
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (20 November 2011):
 PS. you're not labeled a pedophile for this. A pedophile is someone who wants/has sexual relations with a child, not a teenager. "Child" here means under the age of 13 (that is infants to 12 year olds). An adult having sex with a teenager will not be categorized as a pedophile.
...............................
A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (20 November 2011):
It's not okay. But you aren't their parents, and you are not in a position to intervene. Theres nothing you can do about it really, other than alienate them and push them away from you, which will just make them bond together even closer.
As long as they don't have sex then it is legally okay. But your friend must be very immature to be happy with a 15 year old, who in turn is more immature than other 15 year old girls. But that's just how society (and I) view it.
...............................
A
female
reader, uroboros +, writes (20 November 2011):
any sexuall activity with a person under 16 is a crime in the uk.take care.
...............................
A
female
reader, Claraw1  +, writes (20 November 2011):
 I agree with Ciar, it is not ok. If she is labelled a paedophile, it will follow her for the rest of her life. Make it hard for to get or keep a job, she will be restricted in where she can live (as in nowhere close to schools, parks or anywhere that children are.)
It is better that she is reminded of these things from you than from the police. If she really wants to be with this boy, she would be better to wait to be in a relationship with him once he is legal age, and then she will be right. As for now, it's not ok.
...............................
A
female
reader, Ciar  + ♥, writes (20 November 2011):
 No, it is not ok. The legal implications are that your friend could face charges and be labelled a paedophile.
She might not like being reminded of this fact but it's better she hears it from you than from the police.
...............................
|
