A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:We have been dating for about 4 and a half years now and used to regularly have sex, sometimes 2 or 3 times in one day and she could handle it, granted she was 16 and I just turned 17 when this happened.We have since slowed down a lot, down to sometimes just once a week or every other week because I don't want to any more because I hurt her so bad now. The problem comes when she is extremely horny and turns me on to the point where I want it to and she is the one telling me to put it in and I go very slow and I'm super careful and more then generous with the foreplay because thats the part she enjoys, and obviously i enjoy the sex part. Lube is not the problem, is gets pretty much like a slip and slide down there for her sometimes going down on her for 20-30 minutes at a time... I've always been bigger then average.. almost as big around as a mag-light and about 11" long currently. I was basically her first and we do plan on being together for a lot longer, and it would be nice to be able to have sex and have us both enjoy it again because she used to enjoy it more then me, but now it just hurts her. She thinks I might be too big but I really don't want to believe that because there is not much I can do about that and im only 20 years old.... Any ideas as to what it could be or something new we can try that might help a little bit?
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female
reader, Euphoric29  +, writes (22 January 2013):
Dear OP,First, I would try different positions. There are some positions - especially when I'm on my back and my legs are up - that even an average sized penis would hurt me very much. It's a question of the angle with which the penis goes inside the vagina. Depending on the angle, it hits the head of my cervix, which basically feels like a punch in the belly.Doing it from behind or in the spoon position are good positions, I find. Also missionary, with the legs down. Well, I am sure you will find things and illustrations on the internet :)Second, I would try and change your technique. Heavy thrusting can really cause pain. Try to do it with feeling. Not so much in-out, more sliding and grinding if you know what I mean. If you try something like lying on your back and let her do the in-out thing, so she can adjust speed and depth, would be a good idea too.Ah, and my favourite: If she doesnt' enjoy penetration so much but you still want to have fun at the same time, why not doing some 69? What gets me suspicious about the it's-to-big-theory is that your girlfriend seemed to have once enjoyed the sex but now doesn't anymore. Maybe this is not even a problem of your size then, but something else. What changed in your relationship or the way you have sex?
A
male
reader, Hennessy1989  +, writes (22 January 2013):
 Makes a change reading a question like this, normally guys are always moaning about being too small. The truth is that your doing all you can, you may have to go with anons answer even if its not as enjoyable for you. Also more than once a night and it's gonna hurt her, and maybe even for a few days after.
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A
male
reader, TrancedRhythmEar  +, writes (22 January 2013):
 Different positions might work or even different acts to keep her excited. Or toys even once in a while so her insides can take a break lol nicely done my man.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2013): I had the same problem with my bf. Hes thick and fairly long at 8in. I was going to say to make sure shes horny and that you do lots of foreplay- because thats my problem- but it appears you are doing that. Have you tried any positions where you cant go in as deep? Does thhe amount of time you have sex have anything to do with it? It may not be as satisfying but have you tried going only a little more tha half way until you are close to orgasm then go in all the way the last few thrusts? Thats really all I can think of. What about anal sex? I always find it hurts at first but I can handle it better than vaginal sex- esp painful vaginal sex. That may not work in your situation but just some ideas good luck and I really hope you find a solution good luck.
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