A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Once A Cheater Always A Cheater?!?Help! My boyfriend and I recently got back together after being broke up for several months! I have a really difficult situation... I was best friends with his sister for 2 years of highschool! She would always tell me that he was a player and spent numerous hours telling me not to date him! I always figured she was jealous and didnt want me dating her brother, because when we did start dating I would always be with him and rarely had time for her! When I found out from him that she had said the same things about me I was furious! Then one day last November she called me and said she couldnt take it anymore that he had cheated on me with his ex girlfriend. When I confronted him about it he told me that she had come over to their house to talk... because her brother had died(which my bf's brother died several years ago) so they were in the same situation and he told me that he was just being there for her! Well I told him that if he would have told me about it that it would have been ok.. but the fact that he didnt tell me meant that it meant something more to him than that! I couldnt bring myself to trust him again and so we broke up! I found out later that they started to date after I broke up with him... but he would still send me messages telling me that he missed me and that he didnt do anything wrong. Well, I couldnt stop thinking about him and we still kept in touch... eventually we started talking again and started to hang out as friends... but I still loved him! Me and his sister grew apart as she went off to college... and so he started trying to get me back romantically... leaving me flowers on my car... the whole nine yards! I decided to give him another chance, things were great for about 3 weeks, until he got a txt msg from a number that I didnt know, and his sister came home from college for the summer... Ive become so paranoid that something is gonna come between us again and I cant take it any more! I love him so much and cant see myself living with out him! Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
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best friend, broke up, cheated on me, ex girlfriend, flowers, got back together, his ex, jealous, player Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Robyn1701  +, writes (21 August 2007):
 Aww hunni. I feel bad hearing your situation because in my oppinion, cheaters will always cheat. But it's not always true.
Some people change their ways. But a relationship with a guy that you don't feel is faithful could be bad for you.
I get upset with my boyfriend sometimes because he has opportunities to cheat and I want to know where he is all the time to make sure he's not! It just makes him mad at me because he thinks I don't trust him.
Guys should not treat girls that way. Just explain to him how you feel that women should not have to worry if their guy is cheating. But try not to get too soppy about him because if he does cheat then he isn't worth it.
I really want you to msg me and tell me what happens and what you decide to tell him because I really feel for you and I really hope you work it out. He does sound like a nice guy. Good luck to both of you!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 August 2007): Sorry to say it,but i believe people are cheats or they are faithful. Cheats are only sorry when they are caught. The odd one or two could make a mistake but generally speaking,once a cheat,always a cheat (and a liar).
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A
female
reader, redshoes83 +, writes (21 August 2007):
 It seems to me that your boyfriends sister is acting strangly, she has told you to watch out for him (which may be quality advice) but you know how you behave and if her saying to him to watch out for you is silly, then she deffinitely doesn't want you two together and you should disregard whatever she says. BUT it's no good being in a relationship where you are paranoid, you should get him to tell you the whole truth and then you can decide whether it's something you can move on from or not. I don't think if his ex came over to really talk about her dead brother with him that she would really be in the mood for having sex with someone she knows has a boyfriend. You should really tell your boyfriend to be straight with you though, he may have done things wrong which he regrets, but it's mainly to do with whether you want to be with him and whether you can forgive him for these things and leave them in the past....
BE STRONG.
I am in a similar situation, I am giving you the advice I would give myself.
xxx
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A
female
reader, melly786  +, writes (21 August 2007):
 First off.. u need 2 no if its true or not that he did something with this girl.. but if u really do feel it in ur heart thats sumthing else.. ask ur self has he ever been the type 2 be with girls talk 2 alot girls and have a bunch of girls numbers if yes theres a possibility!
but if the answers no hes not like that then he's not a cheater and the 2 of you went on a brake.. now its really messed up that he started dating her so quickly after u 2 broke up.. but thats the past and if u really want 2 be with him still u have 2 let that past go and rebuild that trust and honesty and all the good that u 2 had now if u can not let it go and rebuild then u guys have 2 let this relationship go!
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