A
female
age
41-50,
*ilmishap
writes:If a bloke is out getting drunk every day without you. then when you are there he drunkenly flirts with everyone ,that makes him a flirt. right? harmless drunken flirt. But if he ignores you and later on when u pull him outside to ask him to stop and one of the girls sits on his lap stroking his neck IN FRONT of you and he makes no attempt to move her. Is that drunkeness? he claims not to remember and what else may he do when im not there that he cant remember? weve been together 8 years. would appreciatte a male pov if poss
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (7 May 2013):
 my husband is an alcoholic. He drinks regularly to black out mode... I still HOLD HIM RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS BEHAVIOR.
it does not matter if it's "flirting" or if there is more there... if his behavior bothers you, that's all that matters.
He is an alcoholic. IF you want to live with this, KNOWING what he is and you make that choice, that's on you... but then you have no complaints when he, hurts you when he's drunk, or cheats on you when he's drunk.... and if he is blacking out, then that's still on him and your choice to stay.
Listen to me very carefully.... I am 53 and I choose to stay with my alcoholic husband (and I married him knowing this) YOU are not married to this guy and are young enough to still find an healthy whole adult to partner with.
consider leaving.
A
male
reader, peanut_gallery +, writes (7 May 2013):
The question is: What kind of behavior is this?
My answer is: Childish and unacceptable.
Who wants to be with a drunk anyway?
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (7 May 2013):
 Hi
8 years is long enough to waste on him, he's just using drink as a cover for his behaviour. He remembers what he has done alright.
Unless you want to keep making excuses for him for the duration I would walk away from this one.
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A
female
reader, lilmishap +, writes (7 May 2013):
lilmishap is verified as being by the original poster of the questionso is it likely that the 'flirting' is something more when im no tthere?
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (7 May 2013):
 It looks to me like you would love for someone to validate this boorish behaviour, based upon its occurring under the influence of alcohol..... HOWEVER,....
..... the behaviour you've described is NEVER O.K. Soooo,
Chalk up the 8 years to being a big mistake.... get away from this creep, and get on with your life....
That's this man's pov...
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (7 May 2013):
 If a drunk person were to murder someone, he or she would still be legally and morally responsible, drunk or no.
How would he feel if you got drunk and jumped onto men's laps flirting and breathing all over them? I'm guessing he wouldn't care what you drank.
Don't let him get away with it. He remembers alright, and if he's truly drinking regularly enough to have blackouts, then he is an alcoholic and not for you anyways.
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