A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:my wife and i have been together for 16 years,we have always enjoyed doing things together.She is my best friend,my wife has always been out going something i enjoyed but had to get better at myself and with her help i did.Once in a while my wife might have on a top that i can see her chest a bit easier at some point i told her that that was a turn on.She knew i liked her chest but thought that her chest being on the smaller side was not noticeable,we went out to dinner one night and before she got ready asked what she should wear.My answer was always what ever you feel comfortable in,but this time i asked her if she would wear something a bit more revealing, you know what i mean.This has become more like a form of foreplay for us.What does this say about me? Why is this such a turn on? Does this mean that i don't respect her in some way?Not her, nor anyone else would say we don't have a great relationship,and this is not done in front of friends or family
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (20 November 2016):
 Stop over analyzing things. It's just for fun and no harm is being done. If you feel uncomfortable (You, NOT anyone else) then you can stop.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2016): Not at all, she is your wife, of course you like to see her in revealing clothes. My other half would have me waking around naked constantly if he could! Lol . However you need to make sure she is comfortable. Some days I feel so self concious I cover up a lot and would feel genuinely awful and uncomfortable going out in anything revealing. Then other days I feel like I want to embrace what I was born with :) As long as she is comfortable and still classy then nothing wrong with showing a bit of skin :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionone or two of the answers i got had hoped that there was not going to be one day a third person with us.this is not what i am wanting,nor do i think my wife.at times when we are in bed and she is still in the mood she will talk about past times out or that day out and has asked if i would have liked it if he was able to feel her chest would i be ok with that or she would ask if i noticed how hard he was and would i like to see her help him with that,is this just for fourplay or is this something now she is thinking about,she brings it up and expands on the thought
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A
female
reader, like I see it +, writes (19 November 2016):
 I think you answered part of your own question (why does this turn you on?) in describing it as a form of foreplay. It sounds like a way for you both to feel just a tiny bit naughty in public - she for wearing revealing tops, and you for looking - while staying safely within the boundaries of law and good taste. There might be a touch of exhibitionist or voyeur fantasy at play here and that too is fine and completely harmless.
If she is comfortable with the request, it's not disrespectful at all. It sounds like these are clothes she owns already, and unless you picked them out for her, *she* liked them, tried them on, approved of how she looks in them, and felt that she would be comfortable showing that amount of skin on certain occasions. She probably likes knowing you approve of her attire, and may even be flattered by the request to wear something specific because your appreciation for her is so evident. Many long-term relationships see one or both partners develop some insecurities about how their looks have changed with age and sometimes the addition of children into the equation, and letting your wife know she is as beautiful and desirable to you now as she was 16 years ago is probably a wonderful boost to her self-esteem.
As long as you both enjoy it, there is absolutely no harm done to anyone.
Hope this helps you. Good luck and best wishes!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThe reason i started to wonder about this,while we were out one night I heard while in the bathroom a waiter and someone else talking about how much they liked my wife's outfit then said that the guy with her could care less.I was in a another part of the room so I never say them.
and my does enjoy this also,at first i think she was unsure if i would be able to see other guy's look at her,what she did not realize is she always turns guy's heads that was something i new from the first time i met her,i don't no somehow these thoughts got into my head
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (19 November 2016):
I think you are over thinking this. And I am more curious about why you think so negatively of yourself, than anything else in your post.
No, of course you enjoying your wife to dress revealing is not disrespectful to her, all in moderation. As long as she's not feeling disrespected, and as long as you didn't mean it to be disrespectful, then she's NOT being disrespected.
I would like you to try and think about why you are so nervous of appearing disrespectful to your wife. Did anyone say you were? I mean, where does this idea come from?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (19 November 2016):
 Is she OK with it? If so, I don't see the problem.
If she doesn't like doing it but does it to please you? Then... it's a bit of a gray area where I think you should not ask her or do the play dress up at home.
What does it say about you? That you enjoy her showing off her body in public occasionally. I think it's a "look how hot M wife is"! honestly? if she is OK with this, I don't think it's disrespectful at all.
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