A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello everyone, I have a loving relationship with my bf for a month plus. Before that we already knew each other for almost a year. Although I'm very happy with everything, I can't help but feel that his ex is trying to flirt with him. She replies to his twitters within less than 5 minutes and sometimes calls him to ask about random things like whether he's seen her missing shoes when obviously he hasn't seen them. They do have a amicable relationship even though she cheated on him in the past. While he has assured me that everything is platonic between them, he sometimes makes jokes about getting back with her and this makes me uneasy. I've told him about it and he has since stopped making such 'jokes'. But still, the fact that he made such comments make me insecure. Another thing is his ex does not have a very good reputation ( in other words she's promiscuous) and this makes me even more wary of her. She knows he's attached but the random phone calls she makes to him are rather unnerving. I don't want to be a mean gf who insists that he cuts off all contact with her but it's really frustrating when you see your bf's ex flirting with him. Am I being too possessive? If I'm not, then what should I do about this? Thanks for taking your time off to read!
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (29 September 2011):
 From what you describe, it appears that this B/F hasn't really shifted his priorities to you.... he's content to add you in to his life-mix.... but you're just another tomato and not his real salad.
IF you are uneasy with his behaviour, especially as it concerns his ex-, then you really should only have to mention you unease one or two times, and he should adjust his behaviour to make sure that he is really focused upon you. IF he can't do that, then you need to consider if he really IS a "B/F" or if he's just someone who'd content to play with your feelings/needs/wants....
Good luck....
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