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I'm worried about the way my girlfriend's vagina looks may have something to do with her past!

Tagged as: Health, Sex, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (2 June 2008) 17 Answers - (Newest, 14 May 2010)
A male United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I have a rather strange question to ask here... I am curious about vagina... I have been with a variety of different women (sexually), and up until recently I have always encountered generally the same type(ish) vagina... Usually tighter, snug, not really loose lips etc.

Recently, I found that my current gf's vagina looks a bit loose, the lips seem to be rather long and her vagina seems as though it hangs a bit...

My problem is, that is reminds me of what a porn stars vagina would look like... I am worried that maybe her vagina looks like this because of having a promiscuous past...

So I guess my question is, what can cause a womans vagina to do this? Could it naturally be shaped like this, even if she was still a virgin? Can lots of sex cause this?

View related questions: her past, porn, still a virgin, vagina

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A male reader, mrE United States +, writes (14 May 2010):

Labia size doesnt have much to do with if a woman is sleeping with alot of men. For example se could have only been with two guys but the two she was with she was having sex with daily. Another example is that I once was dating a woman who'd been married and had three kids vaginally. She also told me that she and her ex had sex every single day . She was not loose, but not tight either. At the time she was in her mid 30's.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2010):

Every woman's vagina is different. I am 33 years old my girlfriend is 24. Her vagina is meatier than the 41 yr old I dated before. It would take my previous girlfriend way to long to climax she had a small clit. My 24 yr old girlfriends vagina is extremely sensitive. She climaxes up to six times while I dont. You should re thing about your ladies area before thinking of her in a negative way. good Luck

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A male reader, Mr. Luciano United States +, writes (8 April 2010):

I think it is because of too much sex!..

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2010):

Hello everyone,

I just wanted to add that my girlfriend is 26 and honestly I was wondering the SAME EXACT thing about the way her vagina looks.

As I was reading this question I felt like it was ME asking it. I wanted to thank everyone for answering his question because you have ALL answered mine and I feel 1 million percent better about my girlfriend.

When we first started having sex I notices her lips were a bit long and flappy. I honestly got worried that my girl slept around or had a WILD past lol. Yes I'm gulty of using past women and porn to compare as well. I just got worred becasue I've had a girlfriend whose lips were that long and flappy.

Again, Thank you ALL for your VERY helpful answerd and advice. What a relief it is and th worring is OVER!! LoL

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2008):

Stop watching the porn crap and trying to compare your real, human, loving girlfriend to your imagination of what someone might be like.

If you have not had many girlfriends and porn is your only experience, welcome to reality. We are all imperfect.

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A male reader, oldfool Australia +, writes (3 June 2008):

oldfool agony auntI've slept with prostitutes. These girls were sleeping with several men a day over a period of several years, and yet some of them had the tightest, neatest little pussies I have experienced.

You mentioned that the lips are rather long. I presume you are talking about the labia, which don't belong to the vagina but to the vulva. Women have all kinds of labia, including longish labia that protrude out beyond the vulva. That is, they are visible even when she's got her pussy closed. This is nothing unusual and certainly has nothing to do with the number of her sexual partners.

Don't worry about that kind of thing. The look of the vulva doesn't tell you much about her sexual experience.

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A female reader, lexilou United Kingdom +, writes (3 June 2008):

lexilou agony auntYes I know its a legitimate questin its just gets my goat every time we see it on here so you are not the only one who feels this way!! No I dont think too much sex especially given her age would cause this. The outside bit is just cosmetic but the inner workings are governed by muscles but will still vary in size and depth and width and all women are going to be different in that respect too, if you mean she feels loose inside then I doubt its sexually related, women do often get looser after children but this can easily be rectified in most cases with pelvic floor excercises (squeezing the muscles basically) unless there are complications like a relapse. Ive had three kids and am nearly 40 so have had my share of men but my husband used to call his ex wife who is a lot younger than me and childless slack alice as she just kinda 'opened up and swallowed him whole' (and yes I told him off for saying this too) so I guess there is not a lot you can do but accept this if you love her x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2008):

A LOT of sex can not make vaginal lips longer, which could easily make it look loose, even when it is not.

Whether it's that you are refuring to or the actual feeling when you're inside her I don't know.

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A male reader, eddie Canada +, writes (2 June 2008):

eddie agony aunt If you have a thin penis does it mean you wore it down making porn movies?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Ok, well how about this question: Can having A LOT of sex cause your vagina to do this? Like, can it take your vagina from being "tight" to "loose"... I use those words in lack of better vocabulary...

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2008):

Women's vaginas are all different. Your girl friend has long vaginal lips as a small percentage of women do. It's natural. She was born this way.

A friend of mine once confinded in me that she was this shape, she was worried that it looked different from other people's. She was a virgin.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2008):

Unless your a gynocologist, you have no idea of the variety of shapes that a woman's vagina can take. How many have you seen to compare. Unless it's all that porn you've been watching and using to judge her with. I'm sure if she starts watching porn with you, then she will be able to make her own comparison about your own inadequate (in comparison to the long "dicks" in porn) private parts.

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States + , writes (2 June 2008):

Tisha-1 agony auntWomen's genitalia come in all shapes and sizes, so I expect that she may just be built that way. Do you have any suspicions about her other than her physical appearance?

And if you've been intimate with a lot of women, thus you could be considered to be sexually promiscuous, so please be VERY careful about applying a double standard to her presumed behavior.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I should also mention that she has NOT had a child...

lexilou: I did not mean to be rude in my post, it is a legitimate question.

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A male reader, Danielepew Mexico +, writes (2 June 2008):

Danielepew agony auntI think your real concern isn't whether she has had a lot of sex before, but whether she's a slut.

I have never perceived changes in the vagina of a woman I've been with. I suppose they do change with age, and I know for a fact that they change with delivery. I'm not aware whether these changes would be exactly the same for all women. But I have never expected one vagina would look exactly like the other.

Let's assume, for a moment, that a vagina actually becomes the way you mention after a lot of sex. Still, she could have had all that sex with one single partner. So, even in that fictitious case, the "evidence" would not be conclusive.

I don't think that the looks of her vagina alone should give you the idea that "she's been things and done places".

Whether her vagina would look like this being a virgin or not, I guess it doesn't matter anymore. She's not a virgin now.

If she's good to you, that's all that matters.

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A female reader, lexilou United Kingdom +, writes (2 June 2008):

lexilou agony auntI get really annoyed by this questions, all women look different and having saggy lips does not mean she has slept around!!!!!! Ive seen plenty of porn stars on film who look tight but have probably slept with hundreds of men. Just like mens penises we come in all shapes and sizes and from one woman to the next you never know what you are going to get and the look has nothing to do with her sexual past. When were older and Im talking 70 year old and beyond its probably going to sag a bit in some cases (no offense to any 70 year old aunties here) but so will your balls mate x

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A female reader, I'llTryToHelp United States +, writes (2 June 2008):

I'llTryToHelp agony auntEvery woman's vagina inside and out can and will look different. It's the same as a person's face with different eyes, nose, lips, ears.

I'm sure every man's penis doesn't look exactly the same, either. Not the same size, length, color, straight or curved. Get my meaning? If a guy's penis is curved, should you automatically think he's been using it too much?

Get real, buddy!

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