A
female
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*itta
writes:I dont know what to do. I'm in a bit of a rut with my current boyfriend. I've been with him since I was only 15 and I'm now 19. I feel like I've out grown the relationship and hes done some things in the past that i cant get over. The problem is that I think I want to end the relationship because I'm falling for someone else but I really dont want to hurt my boyfriend. We live together and If we split up he would have to move out, and hes got nowhere to go but his moms house. And I dont think I could cope financially, although I know thats no reason to stay with him. Another problem is that I'm not sure the guy I like likes me back. We flirt and have fun but I dont know how he feels. I really dont know what to do! I dont want to hurt my boyfriend and I cant bring myself to end it even though hes unforgivably hurt me in the past. And I dont know how to find out if this guy likes me, I just need to know.
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female
reader, pica +, writes (14 November 2006):
Sorry but you don't stay in a relationship because he has nowhere to go, you can't afford it and your other guy might not work out. Do you plan to spend your entire life with him? It doesn't sound like you want to be with him for its own sake. Sorry but you should move towards breaking up with him because that's where you are headed. Better you do it in a controlled way, with no-one else involved, than having a fling with someone else and hurting him that way.
A
male
reader, Thomas17  +, writes (14 November 2006):
 as what the two peopl above have mentioned, yes. take the time to think it over.. having a boyfriend for over 4-5 years is a pretty strong relationship.. breaking it wouldbe really devastate your boyfriend..
think it over..slowwwllyy....
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A
female
reader, mcbirdie +, writes (14 November 2006):
 I think you need to understand that the two issues--that of whether or not to leave your current boyfriend, and whether to pursue this new guy--are two seperate things. It is unhealthy to think "Shall I leave Guy A for Guy B?" You need to take some time and think about whether you want to be with your boyfriend, independently of what you want from Guy B.
I'm a bit worried that you say your boyfriend has done unforgiveable things in the past. If so, why are you still with him? Do you feel you can't handle your life without him? Finances and practicalities are not good reasons to stay together, and 19 is too young to settle. My recommendation would be to take some time for yourself, to decide what you want--independent of the men in your life.
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A
female
reader, Astrid  +, writes (13 November 2006):
 I think that you feel as if your losing your youth because of having a mate since that young and u're tempted to experiment and try new ways but please take care and think it over slow as you may lose the person you really go for just ago with somebody who maybe doesn't care about you
good luck
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