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I'm 14 and having Quads ..please help !

Tagged as: Pregnancy, Sex, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (20 January 2007) 10 Answers - (Newest, 14 February 2007)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *aby_kiss_passion writes:

i was with my boyfriend daniel for 1 year. and last year when i was 13 we decided to have sex. we used the pull-out method but it obviously didn't work. i kept on being sick so dad took me to the doctors. that was when they told me that i was pregnant. with four babies.

dad was so angry...he keeps punching me in the stomach but i don't want him too. i don't want the babies to die. i want to be a mother to them. but i'm scared...

what happens in labour? does it hurt?

the doctor said my case is unusual...you don't normally get 14 year olds expecting quads.

also i only found out when i was five months pregant. now i'm six months.

what shall i do? tell me whether i should keep them or put them up for adoption.

they keep kicking my stomach and i don't know why.

Please help me. Tell me all i need to know about pregnancy.

Jade xxx

please tell me everything about what i should expect in my pregnancy.

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A female reader, willywombat United Kingdom +, writes (14 February 2007):

willywombat agony auntI was going to suggest that this was a put up question, then I read the answer below. This is BS and should be treated as such.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2007):

Sorry people, I am a midwife and I can assure you this girl is NOT having quads. First of all at 5mths gestation she would be the same size as a single pregnancy woman at full term and so would not just finding out she is pregnant. Also by 6mths she would be in hospital on bed rest as quads usually arrive by 7mths, having scans every 2 weeks and under a specialist and not asking for basic pregnancy advice on the internet.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2007):

I think you are to young to be having one let alone 4! Give them up to familys that can provide for them. You can't at your age and with no help from your dad. Getting help from the state is just a dandy. If I had it my way they would not offer all the help they do because I am sick of paying for 14 year old girls to go out and have litters of kids. Give them up! Think about them and not yourself!

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A female reader, chazx United Kingdom +, writes (24 January 2007):

chazx agony auntbabe, if ya need me just private message me and I'll try to help you as much as i can ok. where abouts you live.

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A female reader, x.Helpful.Cupid.x United Kingdom +, writes (22 January 2007):

x.Helpful.Cupid.x agony auntHiya.

God, quads! Congrats...But this still must be really scary as you are so young. You werent to know that the "pull out" method would work as well. I think your extremly brave..But the choice to keep them or not is completly up to you. Your dad is abusing you for something that isnt really your fault and this is horrible behavour. I suggest you let childline know..or a trusted friend or family member. The babies are kicking because they are around the time when they move alot, so dont worry. With 4 babies, i dont think you will have a natural birth, probably a cesariun so you wont feel it. Im sure someone in your family will support you during pregnancy and birth etc..so dont worry. Expect bigger boobs, wider hips and maybe a bit of morning sickness. Remember to have regular scans just to check everythings ok.

Good luck

xx

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2007):

First of all congratulations.

Pregnancy is very scary with just 1 baby never mind 4. My baby is 1 soon and im 19. During pregnancy alot of things happen to you. Your boobs and nipples get bigger, you get stretch marks, your hips increase in size, your body is just not normal. But you have 4 very beautiful babies growing inside you. They will move everyday and you will feel them kick you. My baby used to kick really hard.

As for your dad you need to report him for what he is doing, not only is he violently abusing you but he is committing attempted murder against your babies. Try phoning child line 0800 1111 or contacting social services.

It is entirely your choice whether or not you keep your babies or put them up for adoption. Do not make an irrational decision as this may ruin your life. Think carefully and talk to people before you decide. Try phoning your local teenage pregnancy via connexions or visit your family planning clinic, your gp will also help.

I will not lie to you hun labour does hurt but with you having 4 babies it is very unlikely you will be allowed a natural birth. In this case they will give you a caesarean with painkillers so you will not feel a thing.

If you feel anything abnormal or that anything is wrong do not hesitate to phone your doctor or go to the hospital

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2007):

This might not be something you want to hear right now, but may I say congratulations to quadruplets! Wow, I bet that must be super scary for you - the babies' futures and such.

Putting them up for adoption might be good for them but probably not good on your mental health - losing four babies of your own. Leave that to the last option. If you can, register for support services with your health department as everyone has said here.

Also, your bf needs to take responsibility as well. Teenagers should go through school and have a bit of fun really before tackling the world. Oh well... That's how unprotected sex comes about - even using the legendary and not reliable "pull out" method.

BTW, agreed with the other aunts/uncle, got to stay away from your dad.

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A female reader, Juliette United Kingdom +, writes (21 January 2007):

Juliette agony auntYou need to ask your GP or midwife for social services to assess you urgently, maybe to go to a safe house such as a hostel. It isn't ideal, but that way you would be safe from physical abuse whilst you get your thoughts together and have access to counselling so you can make an informed decision about the babies. You could ring NHS Direct as they have all the appropriate contact numbers on hand that you could try.

Deal with it NOW as you have struggled on long enough without sufficient support.

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A female reader, vina_101 United Kingdom +, writes (20 January 2007):

vina_101 agony auntVisit your nearest clinic or book an appointment with a doctor and tell them about your situation. Since you're in the UK and if you're not sure where your nearset doctors is maybe you should look in the yellow pages for a doctor or call 118-118. A qualified nurse or doctor will tell you all you need to know. They are the experts. Get the advice from them and see what happens next. Let us know how you get on ok?

Is there a safe place you can stay away from your angry father? Any other relatives you could stay with? If you can't think of anywhere right now then maybe the people at the clinic can suggest somewhere for you.

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A male reader, Ponungalungb United States +, writes (20 January 2007):

Ponungalungb agony auntHi Jade,

What kind of a father punches his pregnant daughter in the stomach?

Where's your mother?

I'm not sure which country you live in but you should be getting prenatal care from a health care provider. Contact your local health departmant and have someone meet with you.

You obviously feel like you are all alone in this. Get some help. You shouldn't be asking people on the net these questions, your doctor or a health care provider should be telling you what to expect and how to take care of yourself.

Good luck to you.

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