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I'm 13 and my boyfriend (15) wants to have sex with me!

Tagged as: Dating, Sex, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 February 2009) 26 Answers - (Newest, 28 December 2011)
A female Germany age 26-29, anonymous writes:

I need you advice. My boyfriend (15) wants to have sex with me, but I think I am too young. What do you say? I really would like to have sexual intercourse, but I'm not sure whether I am old enough to decide that.

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A female reader, Mozorox247 United States +, writes (28 December 2011):

I was in the same situation just a couple months ago my boyfriend just turned 16 and I am 13. We thought we loved each other and he wanted to have sex really bad and he kept talking about it and I just couldn't say yes. I know my parents would have been really mad so I didn't do it. Thankfully I said no.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2010):

I am in that same situation, but you gotta know that if he is older than you he will try to take advantage of you!! Ask him if he will wait and if the bastard gets mad than he is not worth it!! if he says okay you know he loves youa and he is willing to wait for you!! Give that a try... let me know how it goes!

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A female reader, was it all just a dream United Kingdom +, writes (23 March 2009):

was it all just a dream agony auntim having the same problem but my bf is 16 in early april and im 14 in the middle of july, but i hav been with my bf for only 3 weeks and im not sure what to do but iv already had sex but i dont know if i want to wiv the bf im wiv at the minute because sumtimes sex ruins relationships and i feel different about this lad he does respect me like he doesnt try to pressure me because most of the time he will say hes ready when im ready but sumtimes he will say stuff that makes me think hes only with me for sex i get people to ask him and he will say no hes with me because he luvs me what should i do please send me good advice coz i really need it at the moment....

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A female reader, was it all just a dream United Kingdom +, writes (23 March 2009):

was it all just a dream agony auntim having the same problem but my bf is 16 in early april and im 14 in the middle of july, but i hav been with my bf for only 3 weeks and im not sure what to do but iv already had sex but i dont know if i want to wiv the bf im wiv at the minute because sumtimes sex ruins relationships and i feel different about this lad he does respect me like he doesnt try to pressure me because most of the time he will say hes ready when im ready but sumtimes he will say stuff that makes me think hes only with me for sex i get people to ask him and he will say no hes with me because he luvs me

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A female reader, femalecupid00 United States +, writes (17 February 2009):

IM GLAD YOU DECIDED NO! Cause theres so much going in the world today its not worth your life. you'll be so happy you waited i wish i have. Besides AIDS and HIV these HPV IT CAUSE 70% OF CERVICAL CANCER FROM SEX ALONE YOU DONT HAVE TO ACTUALLY CATCH SOMETHING TO HURT YOUR BODY. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF AND I LOVE THAT YOU ARE TAKING YOUR TIME ABOUT THIS AND REALLY GIVING IT THOUGHT. Its a big step and once you take it theres no turning back. GOOD LUCK KIDO!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009):

My other one didnt get posted! Take it from me *wait* i had my daughter at 16!!! I was young its not easy being a mom at 18 i cant admagine being a mom at 13!!! Your still young you will regret it for the rest of ur life sweetie!

[Moderator's note: Messages in all caps are not allowed, please write in lowercase!]

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A female reader, skye.w United Kingdom +, writes (16 February 2009):

skye.w agony aunthaving sex at a young age is a mistake and you will regret it after uve done it he will leave u feeling low and dirty u need to tell him ur to young and u should wait for someone special if ur b/f cant except u not having sex hes not worth it

skye x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009):

thank you very very much for all this answers. tomorrow i will talk with him and say him i dont want to have sex because i am not ready yet.

THANKS A LOT!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009):

Having sex at a young age with someone you really like is a big mistake. After he's had enough of you and leaves you heartbroken you'll just hate yourself. Just wait until you're older and a lot wiser other wise you'll just be beating yourself up.

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A male reader, Ted-ster United States +, writes (16 February 2009):

Have trust in yourself -- you are right -- you're too young to have sex right now.

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A female reader, aunty_rach United Kingdom +, writes (16 February 2009):

tell your bf to look up the UK's latest news of a 13 year old and a 15 year old who have become parents! that will put him off.

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A female reader, minnie_me  +, writes (16 February 2009):

Girl youre way too young. Tell your guy that you are not ready to have sex you are to young. If he really loved you then he would understand how you feel and except it. If he doesnt except no as an answer then its probly now a good idea to stay in the ralationship.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009):

im 20 and I am still not ready

dont worry just tell him No. you are definetely NOT ready huni. x x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009):

I always say the same thin to things like this. Even if you were to feel you were ready it is illegal and wrong. Talk to your boyfriend and explain how he is two years older and has had more time to think about it then you and his age must make him feel more ready. If he cant handle it he is not worth it!

Hope this helps :) x

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A female reader, mimisoph3 United States +, writes (16 February 2009):

mimisoph3 agony auntgirl it seems like youre not ready,if ur writing this as ur problem.dont do something you dont want to do cuz u will regret it...tell your bf no sex i'm too young or leave the fella

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A reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009):

I truly cannot believe some of you! Did anyone miss the part where this girl says she is ONLY 13 ???? I cannot believe that adults would sit in here and tell a 13 year old child to give her boyfriend a handjob or blowjob....or even better yet....wait until you're 16....because that is SOOO much older. Sheesh...what is wrong with you people?!?!?!

Kiddo....you are WAY too young to even be THINKING about sex...with ANYONE! You should be focusing on school, clothes, hobbies, friends....NOT boys...and certainly NOT SEX!!! If this kid is pressuring you to have sex, you need to turn the other way and RUNNNNNNN for your life! Not only will he not stop pressuring you...but once you do it...he's gonna leave you.....heartbroken, depressed, and possibly pregnant. Is this what you want? You are still a baby yourself.

Get rid of this loser and enjoy your life. You are so so so young, and you are only young once...but you'll be old for a long time...

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A male reader, ArmyMedic United Kingdom +, writes (16 February 2009):

ArmyMedic agony auntThe very fact that you are having doubts suggests that you don't feel ready yet. I think that it is well worth waiting till you feel ready not just feel the urge.

And when you do decide to have sex make sure he wears a condom

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A reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009):

Guy always want sex no matter what age you are.

Wait until both of you are at least 18 and are in love with eachother. You will both be much more mature and the experience will be much more satisfying when you are both adults.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009):

Your are too young, that's for sure, but you are intelligent enough to realize, this otherwise you would not have asked your question here.

Depending on your maturity, to my opinion, no intercourse before you are 16-17. There is so much more to discover.

You also should realize that boys at your age and his age do not have so much responsibility and do nearly understand the meaning of love.

But they can tell their friends that they did IT or they can put your name name in his book (many boys are doing this). Many peat the numbers, and more intelligent ones write some details.

Maybe your bf is different, because there are exceptions of boys who have intercourse at 15 years old.

But you might see easy that I could be close to right, because nobody who knows to value a girl her respect will ask at a girl of 13 years to have intercourse.

Respect yourself and try to extent your sexual power.

Start to become first an excellent kisser

Let them talk about you because your kisses are so irrisistable and not that you are so willing.

My wife was 22 when she had her 1st sexual contact and she said next time I will not wait so long...17...:)

End tell your bf that you are not ready yet and it will take some years before will be ready. If he cannot wait, he was not worth to do it and if he can wait a few years shows that you are really special for him.

Good luck and be wise.

rate the answer plse, also if you didnt like it.

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A male reader, anoms United Kingdom +, writes (16 February 2009):

anoms agony auntwell you are wise beyond your years, dont feel obliged to have sex because your partner wants it right now, be strong and stand up for yourself, i know you dont want to break up over this, if he's 2 years older than you, then he needs to grow up and be mature about it, and let you make these choices when your ready to, otherwise tell him to take a hike, these early relationships rarely last that long and you dont want to live with the regret after he's gone. gudluk.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009):

If he really wants to have sex, but you dont want to have real sexual intercourse, you could give him a hand- or blowjob.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009):

You are too young. Not sure what the law in Germany is, but I can guess your boyfriend would be committing statutory rape. If you're not sure, don't. A good boyfriend will understand and wait till you are ready.

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A male reader, MyDestiny United States +, writes (16 February 2009):

MyDestiny agony aunt tell you're not ready to go that far yet and he should understand..both of you are way too young to be having sex

and if actually do have sex..use protection

but i wouldn't at your age cause the whole thing is complicated..

gudd luck

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009):

I'm 15 and had sex for the first time with my bf(17) after only being together for 1 month i regretted it for a long time and was scared that i might be pregnant i ended up not being pregnant but that was the worst feeling ever. So i know you want to and honestly you are to young to decide that. I think you should wait until your older and able to deal with some of the stuff that comes with having sex. Now me and my bf are still together and nothing really changed between us but if i could i would go back i would wait so it would be more special and not so awkward.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009):

If you are not ready you should not. Part of being a woman is taking responsiblity and listening to your gut. DOn't ever give in to pressure it is something you will deal with your entire life and good to start practicing. :)

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009):

If he really wants to have sexual intercourse, i would say you give him a handjob or a blowjob. Because youre too young to have real sex.

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